Unanswered Past
by babylove969
Summary: Some spoilers for season 5 and ending of season 4. Let me just get that out of the way. I started this story two months ago and now I am going to post it. Deeks is dealing with the torture and coming back to NCIS. His past gets dragged up for the start of a new case. A case that will put Sam and Deeks as partners again. Summary inside plus warnings.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Okay so I thought I would write this about Season 5. We know that Deeks went through some pretty bad things in the Season 4 Finale. We also know that in Season 5 we start to learn more about his past and growing up. So I figured I would write something about it. Obviously this won't be what happens in the show, but it was fun to write anyways. We really only know a handful of things that happened to Deeks growing up. He was abused by his drunk dad, he shot him when he was eleven and then after that we know nothing. We don't know anything about his mother or if Deeks is her maiden name or not. Also the writers had his father die, but they also said that at a thanksgiving dinner six years ago his father shot a shotgun at him, but missed. Which, doesn't add up to the fact that his father was in prison and died, before Deeks ever saw him again.

So my story is about Deeks getting a call that his mother and step-father are in jail. He has to get them out and of course there is always a twist to bring the team into a new case. Deeks' step-father has vital information about a cartel that is pushing military grade weapons overseas. The team learns some very disturbing pieces of information regarding Deeks' past.

**WARNINGS: MENTIONS OF PAST CHILD ABUSE, VIOLENCE AND BAD WORDS.**

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Chapter 1

The sounds of screaming and the drill could be heard throughout the room. Sam wanted to tear his eyes away and not watch as a man that had saved his life gets tortured. Sam couldn't though, he couldn't get his body to listen to him and close his eyes so he wouldn't have to see this. This was a man that he had insulted his character. Sam didn't want Deeks to watch his back. He had thought less of him, because of how he acted during the day. Deeks wasn't serious and professional all day at work. He joked around and the banter he had between Kensi was annoying at times to the Navy Seal. Yet here he was alive, because Deeks had saved his life and now he was being tortured so his wife wouldn't be made. Deeks didn't deserve the shit that he put him through during the day. Sam always thought that he wasn't going to be good enough to be an Agent. That he didn't have his trust, because of the way he acted. What Sam never realized before was that when it mattered Deeks was serious and he could shot just as good as the rest of them. Deeks had more than earned Sam's trust before all of this happened and yet Sam had refused to look at Deeks as an equal. He was never going to make that mistake again.

The drilling and screaming stopped and Sam was praying that this was going to be over. Sam knew otherwise though, these men were sadistic and they weren't going to stop until they were both dead. He could hear Isaac's voice asking Deeks once again if Quinn was an undercover agent. Deeks didn't talk he just shook his head no and Sam knew that more pain was going to be coming his way. One of the muscle man that was helping Isaac torture the information out of them grabbed a knife. He cut the front of Deeks' jacket and shirt so his chest and stomach were bare. The man took the short knife and then slowly pushed it into the Deeks' side. Deeks didn't scream he just made a groan sound as the knife went into his skin. Isaac asked him once again and again Deeks shook his head no. The man holding the knife slowly slide the knife into another part of Deeks' stomach. The knife was short so it wouldn't kill him right away. It would make him bleed and if they were here too long Deeks would die from blood loss. They did this four more times and by the end of it Deeks had six shallow stab wounds to his stomach and sides. Isaac was getting pissed off that they couldn't break Deeks. He decided that he was going to take this to a whole new level.

"Hand me the drill." Isaac said.

The one muscle man handed over the drill and the other one went to hold Deeks' head still. Isaac turned the drill on and started to drill on the inside of Deeks' jaw. Deeks started to scream again as Isaac drilled through his jaw bone.

"You don't want to talk then I'll make it so you can't." Isaac said.

Sam was close to tears from just watching this. Deeks was younger than him and the Seal in Sam had made him want to protect Deeks. He was annoying, but he didn't deserve this. Deeks was going through this, because of his wife. It wasn't Deeks' job to protect his wife and part of Sam wanted to scream out that Quinn was an Agent just to make this end for Deeks. Sam didn't know how long it was before the drilling had stopped once again. Sam could tell that Isaac was pissed off and that wasn't going to end well for Deeks.

"Let's see if some time will make him come to his senses." Isaac said as he ripped off the metal device in Deeks' mouth.

The three men left the room and Sam could hear them leaving down the hall somewhere. He heard a door closed and he took the risk in speaking. His own body was still screaming in pain at him, but it was nothing compared to Deeks. Sam could see the blood running down Deeks' face from the drill and Sam knew that his jaw was easily broken in multiple places.

"Deeks" Sam whispered. "I'm so sorry"

Sam watched in horror as Deeks' head dropped forward and Sam knew that he had passed out. Sam wished he knew how long they had been here for. He wished he had some way of getting out of this chair so he could get them out of here. Sam knew that Deeks should be awake, but he didn't have it in him to try and get him to stay conscious. Sam didn't know how long it was before the men came back into Deeks' room. Deeks hadn't moved the whole time and Sam was starting to get scared for the younger man's health. The two muscle men didn't even say anything they just started to punch Deeks on the head and in the body. The first blow woke Deeks up and his mind couldn't even register what was happening. It was all just getting to be too much for Deeks to handle. He could feel his body getting weaker as the blood from the stab wounds still bleed. They finally stopped and Isaac asked once again about Quinn, but Deeks continued to shake his head no. Isaac grabbed a metal bar that was lying on the ground and he slammed it into Deeks' wrist multiple times. Sam could hear the snapping of bones from each blow. Deeks' body was shaking from the level of pain that he was in. Blood was dripping down his face from the beating. His stomach was covered in blood from the stab wounds and Sam could already see some bruising from the blows. Isaac asked again and Sam felt his heart drop with each time Deeks was asked that question. Sam knew that Deeks wouldn't break; he would have done it by now. Deeks was prepared to be tortured to death just to protect Sam's wife. Isaac threw the metal pole at the wall and Sam knew that he was getting to the point where he could just kill Deeks. Isaac grabbed a pair of pliers and grabbed Deeks' right hand. He held Deeks' hand still while he started to pull out his finger nails one by one. Deeks was too weak to even scream from the pain. His mind was going fuzzy and he honestly didn't know how much longer he was going to last.

Once Isaac was done with his right hand he moved to Deeks' left hand. Isaac was reaching the end of his line and with all ten fingernails removed Isaac still wasn't calm. The banging caught everyone's attention and Sam turned to see Callen, Kensi, Michelle and a few other Agents storming the place. Relief flooded through Sam's entire body at the fact that it was over now. The banging also got the attention of Isaac and his two men. They turned just in time for them to be shot. Isaac took one to the leg and his two men took one to their heads. Callen, Kensi and Michelle checked on Sam while the other Agents handcuffed Isaac and dragged him out. Kensi didn't even waste any time before she went over to Deeks who was barely conscious. She couldn't believe all of the blood that was covering his body.

"You alright baby?" Michelle asked Sam as Callen worked on his bindings.

"Eric we need those ambulances." Callen said into his ear wig.

"They're two minutes out Callen." Eric replied.

"Status update Mr. Callen." Hetty said.

"Isaac has been shot in the leg and his two men were shot in the head. Sam appears to be fine I'm not sure about Deeks."

"We'll meet you at the hospital." Hetty said.

"Sam, are you alright?" Callen asked.

"I'm fine you need to help Deeks. He's in bad shape G." Came Sam's shaky reply.

Callen gave a nod and headed into the other room where Kensi was with Deeks. Callen couldn't believe how bad of shape Deeks was in. He was covered in blood and it was clear to the Ex-CIA Agent that he had been tortured. Kensi had her hands on the side of Deeks' face trying to get him to talk. He was awake, but barely and Callen could see him fighting to stay awake.

"Deeks talk to me. Come on stay with me." Kensi said pleadingly.

Callen went and cut the ropes that were keeping Deeks to the chair.

"Come on Deeks say something." Kensi pleaded again.

"I don't think he can. His jaw looks broken." Callen said.

"Where the hell are the medics?" Kensi asked with some anger in her voice.

"Eric said they are two minutes out. We need to get him on the ground and put pressure on the stab wounds." Callen said.

Kensi got up and Callen very gently placed his one hand under Deeks' arm and the other around Deeks' shoulders so he could turn him. Deeks screamed at the movement and Callen instantly stopped.

"I'm sorry Deeks, but we need you on the ground to help stop the bleeding. You're losing too much blood." Callen said.

Callen did his best to be gentle as he moved Deeks off the chair and down on the floor. Deeks' body was shaking from the pain that he was in and they could tell he was having a hard time breathing. Callen figured that he must be bleeding internally into his lungs. Both Kensi and Callen put their hands on the two stab wounds that were bleeding the most. Deeks groaned at the contact and Kensi and Callen tried to keep Deeks calm.

"Hang on Deeks the medics will be here any minute." Callen said.

"How is he G?"

Kensi and Callen looked up to see Sam standing up with Michelle holding him up.

"You need to sit down Sam. The medics need to check you out." Callen said.

"He's right baby you need to sit down." Michelle said.

Sam slowly sat down onto the ground with his back against the wall.

"How is he?" Sam asked.

"He's in bad shape. He needs to get to a hospital." Callen said.

The paramedics came into the room and two went to Sam and the other two went to Deeks. They asked Sam a bunch of questions, but his eyes and attention was fixed on Deeks. He had passed out and the medics were rushing to get him onto a backboard and out of the building. They didn't even hook up an IV to him. Sam knew that was a bad sign and Kensi ran out with them. Callen helped Sam outside and into an ambulance. Michelle went with him and Callen instructed the agents to take Isaac to a hospital for his bullet wound to the leg and not to leave him alone. Callen gave them strict instructions not to let him out of their sight regardless of what anyone at the hospital said. Isaac was holding two nuclear bombs and they still didn't have the location of where they were being held. Once the Agents told Callen they understood, Callen got into his car and took off to the hospital after his two injured teammates.

At the hospital everyone was there, even Granger. They had been waiting close to five hours before a doctor came out to them.

"Sam Hannah?" The Doctor asked.

Michelle went over to him and the others stood off to the side and behind her. They didn't want to crowd, but they did want to hear what the doctor had to say.

"Yes I'm his wife Michelle. These are the people he works with."

"I'm under the impression that Mr. Hannah is an agent with NCIS is that correct?"

"He is one of my Agents." Hetty said.

"And you are alright with them hearing about his condition?" The doctor asked Michelle.

"Yes that's fine."

"Very well, my name is Doctor Richmond I am the attending physician for Mr. Hannah. From what my tests have been able to tell and from what Mr. Hannah has told me he was electrocuted multiple times. Somewhere around the neighborhood of five. Obviously with electrocution it is a serious matter and there are many unknowns involved. There have been people who got electrocuted from a light socket and have died. On the other-side there have been people struck by lightning and have been able to live like it never happened. We ran extensive tests on Mr. Hannah and from what we can tell he will make a full recovery. With that being said he does have a few second degree burns on his skin from the entry and exit wounds from the electrical currant. His heart is beating irregularly and we need to monitor his heart for the next twenty-four hours. If it does not go back into a normal rhythm then we will need to insert a pacemaker to correct the problem. His limbs may still twitch randomly for the next few days, but all of it will go back to normal. I want to keep him here for at least five days to make sure that there are no complications. Do you have any questions?"

"So there's no mental damage done or permanent damage?" Michelle asked.

"From the tests that I have run I don't see any. Mr. Hannah never lost consciousness which is a very good sign. He's awake right now and is talking and is alert. He remembers everything that happened all of which are good signs. He has not suffered any complications from the drowning other than some bruising on his chest from the CPR."

"Drowning?" Michelle asked.

"You weren't aware that Mr. Hannah drowned?" The doctor asked with confusion in his voice.

"We were on an operation and we lost contact with Mr. Hannah and Mr. Deeks. We know nothing about him drowning." Hetty said.

"I don't know the whole story. What I can tell you is that Mr. Hannah told me that he had drowned. Someone gave him CPR I can only speculate, but my best guess would be that Mr. Deeks revived him. You would have to ask them about the situation."

"We will. Sam's going to make a full recovery though?" Callen asked.

"He will. Physically he will be able to be back at work in two weeks. Mentally you would need to speak with a therapist for that answer. I'm not sure what happened to either of these men, but I think it would be good for him to speak to a professional about it."

"Mr. Hannah and Mr. Deeks will be going through many hours of therapy over this before they return to duty." Hetty said.

"Do you know anything about Deeks?" Kensi asked.

"I'm not his doctor so I don't have any information for you. I did see his condition when he came in and they took him to surgery right away. I know it's frustrating, but no news is good news right now. I'll see what I can do about having someone come and update you once they can."

"Thank-you doctor." Hetty said.

"This isn't the normal protocol, but based on the situation you all can wait in Mr. Hannah's room if you wish. He is awake and asking about his wife. I can let Mr. Deeks' doctor know that you will be there."

"Thank-you doctor I think we will take you up on that." Hetty said.

"He is in room 304."

The doctor left them in the waiting room so he could try and get information about Deeks' condition. They all made their way to Sam's room and when they went in Michelle went right to Sam's bedside. She hugged him and Sam held onto her for his dear life.

"I was so worried that you had been made." Sam said.

"I was made, but Kensi saved me. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. How's Deeks?"

"We don't know yet. Now how are you really feeling Sam?" Callen asked.

"I don't know what went wrong G."

"You did nothing wrong. It was Janvier who made you. This is all my fault, I should have seen this coming. He blames me for everything that Iran did to him. He took the first chance he had to betray us and get to you."

"Agent Hannah I know that you've been through something traumatic, but can you tell us what you remember." Granger said.

"Everything was fine. Michelle left and we were going to take the gold to a safe location. Sidorov had one of his men carry the one case and I was to carry the other. He had both of us handcuff the case to ourselves so we couldn't steal it. He had the other man hold onto the keys for when we reached the location. I had my back turned on Sidorov as his other man spoke to me. He hit me over the head with something and I fell into the pool. I remember trying to get out, but the case was too heavy so I was fighting with it. I felt them using something to hold me down into the water. The next thing I know I'm tied up to some chair in a bright room."

"Mr. Deeks radioed in saying that you were in trouble and he had to go in. I think it's safe to assume that he got you out of the pool and performed CPR based on what the doctor said." Hetty said.

"Deeks must have traded his gun for the keys." Kensi said.

"How long were we gone for?"

"You've been missing for two days Sam." Callen said.

"I was mean to him G. I told him I didn't trust him and that it was because of his character. I could tell that he was hurt by it, but he didn't say anything. He saved my life and then he refused to give up Michelle as an Agent. They spent at least a day torturing him and he wouldn't do it no matter what they did to him. He refused to give her up. They put this metal thing in his mouth and drilled into his teeth and into his jaw. They stabbed him, beat him, they pulled his fingernails out of his hands and he still wouldn't do it. Yet there I was just a few days before all of this telling him that his character made me not trust him. I was so stupid not to see that he hides behind his humor."

"Mr. Deeks is a very talented undercover cop. He's one of L.A's best undercover operators. Mr. Deeks can hide behind an alias at a drop of a hat and on many occasions he hides who he truly is. As you all know he came from a horrible childhood and was always told he wasn't good enough or worth anything. Part of him still and will always believe that. However, he has been able to see the positive things in life and he knows how it feels to be in a life or death situation. As such he tends to rely on humor to lighten the mood. He's done it many times while you all are out on a mission." Hetty said.

"It helps. The humor and the horrible jokes it lightens the mood and helps keep at least me grounded." Kensi said.

"We might never know who Deeks truly is. We see parts of him here and there, but who Deeks is at the core we probably will never know." Callen said.

"He always thought you didn't like him or trust him because he's a cop." Eric said.

Eric and Nell had been quiet this whole time. They were a part of the team, but they did something completely different then everyone else. They were techs and almost never in the field. They did what they did and they loved doing it, but that didn't mean they understood what to do in this type of situation.

"That had a lot to do with it. He doesn't have the same type of training that we do. Sure he can shoot, but that didn't mean much to me. He doesn't think the same way the rest of us do and just because he can change who he is wasn't enough for me. I judged him and I underestimated him." Sam said.

"Detective Deeks never went to the federal academy; however, he does have more than enough training for this job. Deeks is a lot smarter than he lets everyone believe. Deeks passed the bar exam on the first try and has the record highest score still to this day. He has survived eight years as an undercover detective and in those eight years he has been on over two hundred operations. Totally over sixteen hundred arrests. Deeks is one of the best cops L.A has. Those experiences from being undercover, has given him the training for this job. If I didn't think he was good enough I wouldn't have let him stay on." Granger said.

"Sixteen hundred people?" Kensi was shocked that the number was that high.

"Mr. Deeks has been on mostly long term undercovers with white supremacist, gangs, drug lords and human traffickers. When he takes down an organization they arrest everyone involved. Mr. Deeks is very good at getting the whole organization together for the take down. Resulting in large number arrests." Hetty explained.

"Wow" Nell said.

"Mr. Deeks has a very impressive resume. That should be more than enough for you to trust him Mr. Hannah." Hetty said.

"I know and believe me I do now. He could have broken during any of that torture and I wouldn't have blamed him. I almost broke down and told them just to get them to stop and leave him alone. I couldn't watch it anymore, but I couldn't look away. Every time I looked away I felt like I was betraying him. Like by me looking at him I was being supportive which makes no sense."

"It only has to make sense to you baby." Michelle said.

"I didn't trust Deeks right away either Sam and he saved me from getting shot." Callen said.

"When did you trust him G?"

"When he saved Kensi's life at the hospital that day. He had taken two bullets to the chest and he still ran down four flights of stairs and got to her before hospital security did. He saved her life and he did it through all that pain. A lot of Agents that I have worked with wouldn't have done that. Deeks did. From that moment on I trusted him, because if he could do that to save Kensi's life then there really was no telling what he was capable of. He proved that he would do whatever it takes to protect her and I believe he would have done the same for either one of us." Callen said.

"I can't believe I underestimated him." Sam said.

"Everyone makes mistakes Sam. Deeks takes a little while to get used to and there are many times he is annoying. He's a good man though and he would have been more than happy to die in that room if it meant that Michelle was safe. It's the same for your kids. You didn't want him anywhere near them, but he was amazing with them. Kids love Deeks and he would do anything to keep them safe." Kensi said.

"I know they did. That's all they would talk about for days afterwards. They kept asking when he would be back over to play with them. I've been so stupid."

Sam shook his head. He was a Navy Seal and he couldn't believe he didn't see through Deeks. He had judged him and that wasn't fair to Deeks at all. Sam knew that he would have to make it up to him and Sam found himself hoping for that chance. It was another five hours before the doctor knocked on Sam's door and came into the very full room.

"Family of Detective Deeks?"

"Yes that is us." Hetty said.

"My name is Doctor Andrews I am the primary doctor on Detective Deeks' case. Let me start by saying that Detective Deeks is alive. He is incredibly injured though. I'll start at the top and work my way down."

Doctor Andrews went over to the X-Ray display that was in the room and he put up Deeks' films.

"This is Detective Deeks' brain as you can see there are some darker spots on his brain those are bruises. This line right here is the fracture in his skull. His brain is what concerns me the most. The bruising and the skull fracture are very severe and brain damage is a serious issue."

"What kind of brain damage?" Kensi asked.

"It's hard to say from what I can see he already has an old injury that has sustained a small amount of brain damage. Does he have a speech impediment?"

"He has a drawl." Kensi said.

"Are you saying his drawl is from brain damage?" Callen asked.

"It is yes. The injury is old he would have been around seven or eight. It's not in his records as to what happened for him to obtain the injury, but you can still see the result on his scans."

"Seven or eight?" Kensi couldn't believe that Deeks had brain damage. She could clearly remember all the times she had made fun of his drawl.

"I'll explain later." Hetty said. "Please continue doctor."

"It's not clear that there will be any brain damage. We won't know until he is awake and aware to do more neurological testing. However, while the skull fracture and the bruising heal he will have some problems. His hands will shake, he will have dizzy spells, be exhausted, uncoordinated, he could have short term memory problems. So he might ask you a question and five minutes later ask you again without even remembering he asked you once before. Again once the skull fracture and bruising heals these problems should go away. Are there any questions about that?"

"How long will it take to heal?" Sam asked.

"Four to six weeks. Until his skull fracture is healed it is very important that he doesn't obtain a further head injury. It's best for him to be inside and in a car for as little as possible for roughly six weeks. At least until a doctor can confirm that the skull fracture is healed. Now his face has some deep bruising and his left cheek took ten stitches. His jaw was the worst. Multiple holes were drilled through his teeth and into his jaw bone. His jaw was broken in six different places. As such we had to insert metal plates to structure and hold his jaw in place until the bones heal. He'll need to see a dental surgeon about his teeth and see what is salvageable and what isn't. His jaw will be very painful for a good six weeks. With pain medication the pain can be managed and kept to a bearable level. Once his jaw is no longer broken the pain will decrease until he will no longer need pain medication however, that could take months before the pain is completely gone. Your jaw bone is strong, but it can take the longest to heal and is the most painful while it is healing. Once his jaw bone is healed then the metal plates can be removed. Are there any questions about that?"

No one said anything so the doctor continued on.

"Next we have the stab wounds. There were six in total and all of which were shallow wounds. He was lucky that the knife was not very long otherwise he would have bleed out long before he arrived here. I was able to repair the damage as well as the internal bleeding from the stabbing and the beating his torso took. We had to remove his spleen due to the level of damage done to it. His right wrist is broken we have placed it in a cast. It will take at least six weeks to heal. There are a total of two hundred stitches on his torso and he will be in a lot of pain until his wounds have healed. He needs to be careful about getting the stitches wet and no salt water. He looks like a surfer to me."

"He lives at the beach." Kensi said.

"He can still be at the beach just not in the water until the stitches come out. The salt water is great for preventing infection, but it will irritate his wounds and skin from the stitches. Obviously his chest is covered in bruising he has two broken ribs and three cracked ribs. He's in for a long recovery physically. He will though make a full recovery as long as his brain doesn't experience anymore trauma. I don't expect him to be waking up within the next three days so don't worry if he doesn't. His body went through a lot and is in a great deal of pain it needs to heal and sleep is the best thing for him right now. We do have him on pain medication for when he does wake up he won't be in a lot of pain, but it might make him out of it and confused so be patient with him."

"He's going to be okay though eventually?" Kensi asked.

"Physically he will be alright pending any complications. Mentally that is a whole other ball game. He's a detective and has seen some horrible things and based on past X-Rays and scans that I have seen he's been through a lot before this. That doesn't change that he was tortured for at least a day. He will be traumatized by this and the sooner he can talk to a professional the better for him. I'm not a practising therapist I can tell you that he could experience panic attacks, flashbacks, insomnia, phantom pain, nightmares, he might be able to still hear the drilling, paranoia, and irritability. Even going to the dentist and being in that chair, if the dentist needs to use a drill he might not be able to physically do it. I would suggest that once he wakes up and is conscious enough to talk that he sees a professional right away. He needs his parents and any siblings if he has them. He needs his family to help support him in this recovery, because there will be times when he just wants to give up and quit. He might need help financially. LAPD insurance only covers sixty percent in medical bills and they don't cover dental. Based on what I've seen he needs at least eight thousand in dental work. He's going to need the support of his family to try and survive this."

"We are his family. We're all he has." Callen said.

"Detective Deeks will also be under NCIS insurance. This happened while he was on our time doing an operation for us. His medical and dental will be fully covered." Granger said.

"Good that's one less thing for him to worry about. Do you have any questions about his health physically or mentally?"

"When can he surfer again?" Kensi asked.

"Mentally speaking I think if he is like most surfers they find it therapeutic so I would suggest as soon as he physically can. Now physically speaking at last eight weeks and then that depends on his wrist. I would suggest he doesn't do it alone just in case something happens."

"So he'll be healed physically in eight weeks." Eric asked.

"Assuming he doesn't do anything to reinjure his injures, between six to eight weeks he'll be healed."

"Can we see him?" Kensi asked.

"You can one at a time. He's in the ICU right now in room 509."

"Thank-you doctor." Hetty said.

"If you have any further questions you can have a nurse page me."

The doctor said as he made his way out of the room. The room was silent for a few minutes as everyone let their minds absorb what they had just heard. Deeks was alive, but he was far from okay. Mentally it was going to take Deeks a long time before he was able to recover from this.

"That was very nice of you to offer to pay under NCIS insurance Owen." Hetty said.

"He went through enough he shouldn't have to worry about medical bills to go with it. I'm going to check in with the other agents and see if Sidorov is talking."

"Let me know if he is awake." Hetty said.

"Will do. Feel better Agent Hannah."

Sam didn't say anything as Granger went outside to contact the agents that were with Sidorov. The room was silent once again and no one knew what to say. To find out that Deeks went through so much in such a short time was unbearable. Deeks was always the one they could count on to make them laugh and un-tense a situation. Now it seemed like that part of him would no longer exist.

"I need to go and see him. I need to be there for when he wakes up." Kensi said.

"I'll go with you." Callen said.

"Hold on for a few minutes. Mr. Deeks won't be waking up for a few days so you can stay here for a few more minutes while I explain what happened growing up. Mr. Deeks won't ever tell you, but I think now you deserve to know. When Mr. Deeks was seven his father had attacked him one night. His father was a horrible monster especially when he drank and Mr. Deeks and his mother were always to ones on the receiving end. Unfortunately Mr. Deeks' mother was not very supportive of him or protective. She would often direct his father's anger towards him so she wouldn't be beaten. One night his father had taken the abuse to a different level. He beat Mr. Deeks for hours and with anything he could get his hands on. He even used his belt to whip him. Once he was done he left Mr. Deeks in the room and he was there for two days unconscious until his mother went into the room. They brought him to the hospital and claimed that he was attacked by a babysitter; that they had been away for three days. He was beaten into a coma and spent three months in the coma before he gained consciousness. His parents never visited him. When he woke up that was when the doctors first discovered the brain damage. Mr. Deeks had to learn how to write, read and talk all over again. The brain damage gave him his speech impediment and made it impossible for him to spell words. If Mr. Deeks is asked to spell a word he's never seen before he can't. He can spell based on memory, he memorised the spelling of words from reading them and writing them out over and over again. It took him a very long time before he was able to recover from the brain damage and he did it on his own."

"How was this man never arrested?" Callen asked.

"When Mr. Deeks woke up from the coma he couldn't talk or write. So when the detective asked him about what happened all Mr. Deeks could do was shake his head no. He was just seven years old and terrified of his father. Even if he could have talked he wouldn't have. It didn't stop there he was in the hospital multiple times until he was eleven. Always a different hospital so they didn't have any records of previous visits and there was always a legitimate excuse for the injuries. When he was eleven his father had beaten his mother and him very badly. He had a loaded shotgun aimed at his head and Mr. Deeks grabbed the thirty-eight revolver; that Ray had given him a few months before. He shot just as his father's finger went to squeeze the trigger. Neighbors heard the gunshot and called 9-1-1. When the police and ambulance got there Mr. Deeks was unconscious and his father was shot in the stomach. It was ruled as self-defence and his father received a seven year sentence."

"Seven years for child abuse and attempted murder?" Sam said angrily.

"His mother refused to testify against him and Mr. Deeks wasn't mentally and emotionally able to do it. They had tried, but he couldn't get the words out on the stand, he had a panic attack and the case was settled outside of the court. His mother agreed to the seven year sentence for domestic abuse and it was over."

"So, because he was too traumatised to talk they just let the man off basically." Kensi said.

"Unfortunately they did. Although, it's a moot point now considering he is dead."

"They let him stay with his mother?" Nell asked.

"They did. They felt that she was a victim just like he was and with his father gone she would raise him better." Hetty said.

"That wasn't true though was it?" Eric asked.

"No it wasn't. She was a wreck from everything that happened. She blamed Mr. Deeks for her husband going to jail. She got heavily into drugs and drinking and often took her anger out on him. There were many times Mr. Deeks would be locked out of the house for weeks. He would have to live on the streets until she let him back into the house. He would stay at Ray's, but Ray's father was abusive as well so it was never a safe place to be either." Hetty answered.

"He didn't have anywhere to go to feel safe. That's really sad for a child to go through." Michelle said.

"It is sad, but he doesn't have to go through that anymore. He has a family now and we will be there for him through this." Hetty said.

"I should go see him. I need to see him." Kensi said.

"I'll come with you and then I'll go back to Ops and see if I can find these nukes." Callen said.

"Miss. Jones and Mr. Beale you two should go back as well and try to locate these nuclear weapons. We have Sidorov is custody, but he most likely won't talk. We need to find any location that might be in his name that he could have these nukes being stored." Hetty said.

"Got it." Eric said.

"As for you Mr. Hannah rest and take it easy. We will worry about everything else. I will call and check in later to make sure you are doing alright. "

"Yes ma'am."

"Don't worry I'll make sure he doesn't get out of this bed." Michelle said.

"Come on now everyone let Mr. Hannah rest we all have work to do." Hetty said.

"Take care Sam. I'll come see you later." Kensi said.

"See ya Sam." Eric said.

"Bye" Nell said.

"I'll come by later partner."

"Be safe G."

Everyone, but Michelle left the room and they headed off in different directions. Hetty, Nell and Eric went to leave the hospital as Kensi and Callen went to Deeks' room. They both stood at the door to Deeks' hospital room and they both couldn't believe how horrible he looked. He was covered in bruising and wires. There was a steady beeping sound from the heart monitor and Kensi took comfort in that. They made their way over to Deeks' bed and they didn't say anything. They could see the bruising and his chest was covered in gauze from the stab wounds. He had an oxygen mask on his face to help him breathe. Kensi sat down in the one chair that was by the bed and she took his hand into hers. She could see the tip of his fingers were red with some dried blood on them. His fingernails were pulled out and Kensi knew that when he woke up he would be in a great deal of pain.

"He'll be okay Kensi. Deeks is strong, a lot stronger than people give him credit for. He survived his childhood and he'll survive this. We'll get him through this."

"I can't imagine what he went through. What if there is more brain damage. I didn't even know he had any. He knows about my father and my mother and my childhood, but I know nothing about his. How is that possible? I've been working beside him for three years and I know nothing about him."

"You know a lot more about Deeks then you think. Sure you don't know what his childhood was like. You don't know about his past, but you know the man that he is today. At the end of the day does his past really matter?"

"It doesn't matter to me what his past is, but I should know about it. I told Monica that what he has done in his past doesn't matter to me. That everything he did was to keep his alias, an alias that has saved a lot of innocent live and I meant everything I said. He's a good man and I trust him with everything in me, but it seems like he doesn't trust me. He could have told me about growing up, but he didn't. He didn't trust me with that information."

"It's not an easy topic Kensi. He probably can't talk about a lot of it and he probably didn't want you looking at him differently. Don't take it personal it really isn't you. It's Deeks and how his mind works. It wouldn't surprise me if he can still hear his father yelling at him. During the day Deeks is always full of humor and jokes. He can be a completely different person at a drop of a hat, but at the end of the day when he is at home all alone. That's when the issues hit. Deeks hides it well, but I'm willing to bet my life that he has self-esteem issues, nightmares from it still and still a lot of hurt from it all. Give him time and when he wakes up talk to him about it. It might do him some good to talk about it for a change."

"I will and hopefully he'll talk to me about it."

"I'm sure he will just give him some time. I should get going we need to still find these nukes. Call me if something happens or if you need anything."

"Ya, good luck."

Callen left Kensi in the hospital room alone with her sleeping partner. Kensi kept his hand in hers as she sat back and waited for him to wake up.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It had been three days since Sam and Deeks were rescued and Deeks had yet to wake up. The doctor said that was to be expected, that Deeks went through a lot and needed time to recover from it. Sam was doing better. His heart rate went back to normal so he didn't need a pacemaker. Both Sam and Michelle were happy about that. Callen and Granger had spent the last three days grilling Isaac Sidorov about the nuclear weapons. Eric and Nell had been sitting in Ops for three days straight now doing everything they could to find the nuclear weapons. To say they were exhausted would have been an understatement. Everyone was doing everything they could to find the nuclear weapons and after a grueling three days they finally had a lead. Callen got a team together and they hit a set of old abandon warehouses to search everywhere for the nuclear weapons. Eric and Nell were able to narrow it down to five warehouses based on the level of radiation in the building. It took a couple hours, but Callen and the team were able to find both nuclear weapons in a storage locker in one of the abandon warehouses. The mission and operation was finally over. It had been going on for months, but now it was finally over. Sidorov was going to the top security prison this country had where he would be executed. The nuclear weapons were back in Government custody and they had all there members of the team safe once again. Sam and Deeks were in the hospital, but they were at least safe now.

Kensi had been at the hospital for three days straight. She hadn't left Deeks' hospital room once during those three days. Hetty had been by to see how Deeks was and how Kensi was doing. Nurses had been in and out of the room for three days every two hours. They were keeping a close eye on Deeks to make sure he didn't get an infection from the operation. The oxygen mask had been removed two days ago and now he was just wearing the one that goes under his nose to help him. His bandages had been changed and Kensi couldn't believe how bad he looked. He was covered in stitches and Kensi found herself unable to look. It was the only time she had left Deeks' side and that was only to stand out front of his hospital room. Deeks had been moved earlier that morning to a normal private room. Kensi was happy that he was no longer in the ICU and the doctor wasn't worried about his health or his recovery. They still had to wait for him to wake up so they could see if he had brain damage or not. Kensi was just trying to be positive. It wasn't easy especially after finding out that Deeks had brain damage from when he was seven. It was all so unbelievable. She couldn't believe that Deeks never told her anything about his childhood. She knew it wasn't easy to talk about, but even when he learned that she was homeless at times he didn't say anything. He could have told her then that he had been homeless off and on as well. She needed to have a serious conversation with Deeks, but she wasn't sure when that would be. Deeks wasn't one to share about his past and after everything that happened she knew he wouldn't be in the mind frame to talk about it.

Kensi also couldn't get her mind to stop thinking about that kiss. She had wanted Deeks to kiss her for months now and when he finally does she runs away. Yes she had to go after Michelle, but she could have at least said something to him. She would talk to him later; she could have said yes that communication works great, something anything would have been better than what she did say. The problem was Kensi wasn't good with relationships and commitment. She was with Jack for years and they were engaged, but he left her. He just took off on Christmas Eve and left her without saying anything. Ever since then she hadn't been with anyone seriously since. She was afraid of someone walking away again and leaving her in pieces. She knew Deeks was different; he was different than any man she had ever dated. He was the complete opposite of Jack and at first Kensi thought that Deeks was annoying and aggravating. He would make jokes at the wrong time, he never took anything seriously and never stopped talking. Over time though, he had wormed his way into Kensi's heart. She saw that he had different levels to his personality and he was more than just some joker. Deeks could be serious when he needed to be. He could become a different person at a drop of a hat. He was talented and he had a lot of different levels to his personality and that made Kensi want to get to know him more. They started to hang out as partners and they started to get to know each other. Kensi wasn't sure when it happened that she fell in love with Deeks, but it had happened. She was in love with her partner. She was in love with the most amazing man she had ever seen in her life. Now she completely screwed it up. All she had to do was say something else after he kissed her, but she didn't. She had ran away and left him there. That was the last thing she had said to him before he was gone and being tortured. Now all she wanted to do was to kiss him back and tell him how much she loved him, but she knew she couldn't. Deeks needed to overcome this before they could even start to entertain their thing being something more.

Kensi was snapped out of her thoughts when she heard Deeks let out a groan. Kensi turned her full attention to Deeks lying on the hospital bed. She grabbed his hand that wasn't in a cast and gently spoke.

"Deeks, it's okay wake up."

Deeks let out a moan as the pain started to hit him full force. Deeks slowly opened his eyes and he had to close them from the pain the light caused his eyes. Deeks freed his hand from Kensi's and brought it up to his eyes to try and stop the pain. Kensi went over to the light switch and turned it off so there was only the small sunlight coming through the room. She went back over to Deeks and spoke.

"It's okay Deeks the lights are off. Can you open your eyes for me?" Kensi said softly again. She didn't know if Deeks had a headache or not and she didn't want to speak too loudly.

Deeks tried to open his eyes again, but he had a horrible headache. He was able to open them slightly. He looked over and saw that Kensi was in fact there beside him. Deeks noticed that he was no longer in that room, that he was in a hospital room now. His whole body hurt like there was no tomorrow.

"Kens" Deeks tried to talk, but he found out that his jaw hurt worse than his head.

Kensi could feel Deeks shaking from the pain and from his head injury. She hit the nurse call button so they could come in and check him out. Hopefully they will be able to give him more pain medication.

"It's okay just relax a nurse will be in here real soon. You are safe just hang on Deeks." Kensi said softly.

Deeks closed his eyes and tried to breathe through the pain. His whole body felt like it was on fire from the pain. He couldn't believe how much everything hurt. He thought he would be feeling better in a hospital and not worse. Deeks heard the door to the room open and he squinted his eyes to see that a nurse came into the room.

"Page Doctor Andrews." The nurse told another nurse behind her.

The nurse came into the room and closed the door behind her. She went over to the other side of the bed as she spoke to Deeks.

"Hello Detective Deeks I'm nurse Rachel. It's good to see you awake. I know it hurts to talk so I won't ask you that many questions. The most important one right now is how bad is the pain on a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst." The nurse said.

"Nine" Deeks said through gritted teeth. Deeks couldn't believe how bad the pain was all throughout his body, but especially his jaw and head.

"Okay no more talking then. Over here is your pain relief button. When it is glowing green you can push it. Right now it is set at the maximum dosage we can give you. It will put you to sleep most likely and make you a little out of it. In a few days we will lower it and keep doing that as the pain lessens to eventually you can just be on a pill. Doctor Andrews will be in in a few minutes. So I need you to hold out for a little bit longer before you can hit that button. He really needs to speak to you and see how you are doing. You took a few good hits to your head and suffered some head trauma. So he needs to talk to you and see how you respond. I know it hurts, but it's very important for us to do. We need to make sure that you have no brain damage or any extra trauma that we missed. So I need you to breathe through the pain right now and just bare-with us."

Kensi held onto Deeks' hand again and rubbed small circles on the back of his hand with her thumb.

"It's okay Deeks, just breathe." Kensi said calmly.

Deeks did his best to breathe through the pain the problem was it hurt worse than he remembered. Now that he had slept for three days his mind was fully aware of all the pain his body was in. He couldn't believe how much everything hurt. He could feel himself slightly shaking from the pain. Deeks just couldn't believe how much pain he was in. He swore it was not this bad in that room and yet here in the hospital it was ten times worse.

"Deeks look at me." Kensi said softly. She could tell that Deeks was in a great deal of pain and she wanted to so badly hit the pain relief button.

Deeks turned his head to look at Kensi, but his eyes were still squinted from the pain in his head.

"Just breathe. The doctor is going to be here very soon. You can do this just breathe." Kensi said encouragingly.

Kensi was so relieved that Deeks was finally awake, but now she was wishing for him to be back asleep where he would be free from the pain. The door finally opened again and Dr. Andrews walked through the door. He went over to where the nurse was so he was close to Deeks.

"Hello there Detective. I am Dr. Andrews and I am your attending physician. I can tell you are in a great deal of pain so I will make this quick. You have some bruising on your brain as well as a skull fracture. So I need to just do a quick couple of tests to make sure that you don't have any brain damage or neurological problems. We will do this very quickly so it won't take long. I know your jaw hurts so I'll do my best to not make you talk. Can you squeeze your partner's hand?"

Deeks squeezed Kensi's hand and Dr. Andrews gave a nod.

"Good. Your right hand is in a cast from your wrist being broken. So be careful when you move it for a couple of days. Can you tell me what two plus two is?"

Deeks really didn't want to talk, but he knew he would have to in order for the doctor to leave him alone. All Deeks wanted to do was to sleep and escape from this pain.

"Four" Deeks said through gritted teeth.

"Good. Do you know what city you are in?" The doctor asked.

"L.A?" Deeks said as he looked over at Kensi with confusion on his face.

"Yup." Kensi said.

"Good. I know your jaw hurts. It was broken in multiple places and as a result I had to put metal plates along your jaw until your bones heal. It will be sore for a couple of weeks, but the pain medication will help relieve that pain. I won't ask you anymore questions I do just need to look into your eyes and make sure your pupils have not gotten worse."

Doctor Andrews grabbed his little pen light from his pocket and leaned over so he could look into Deeks' eyes. Once the light hit Deeks' left eye he couldn't help, but look away. He let out a groan and released Kensi's hand to bring his own hands up to his face. The light hurt, it was a level of pain that Deeks never felt before. His shaking was worse and he was reaching his braking point.

"I know the light hurts, but I need to see your eyes." Dr. Andrews said.

"He's in too much pain right now. All you are doing is causing him more." Kensi said with force as she stood up.

"His eyes will be sensitive to light while the skull fracture is there. In a week or so it won't cause him pain, but I need to make sure that the skull fracture and his pupils are not worse. I don't want to cause him pain, but I need to check." Dr. Andrews tried to reason with Kensi.

"So do it when he's asleep or when the pain medication is in his system, but you are not doing it now." Kensi said back as the door to the room opened again to reveal Hetty and Callen standing there.

They wanted to come and give Kensi the news in person that it was finally over. What they didn't expect to walk in on was Deeks awake and shaking from pain with Kensi and the doctor arguing over top of him.

"I need to do it while he is awake so I can see how his pupils respond. I'm not doing this to be cruel, but I have to." Dr. Andrews tried again.

"You're not doing it. Do it later when he has some pain medication in him." Kensi argued back.

"Everyone calm down. Miss. Blye and Dr. Andrews lower your voice. I don't know what is going on, but the loud voices are only going to hurt Mr. Deeks more. Now someone explain to me what is going on and why doesn't Mr. Deeks have pain medication?"

Hetty said as she moved into the room. Callen went over to Kensi to see if he could help Deeks. Deeks' shaking was getting to the extreme level and Callen knew he was in unbearable pain. They could see that Deeks' heart rate was going up and Callen was getting upset over this.

"Why is his heart rat so high?" Callen asked with anger in his voice.

"His heart is reacting to the pain that his body is in. If I could just finish this test then he can have pain medication." Dr. Andrews said.

"Why does Mr. Deeks not have pain medication now?" Hetty asked again.

"It will put him to sleep and I need him awake to check his brain. I need to see if his pupils have gotten worse. The only way I can do that is by looking at them with this light, but because of the skull fracture his eyes are sensitive to light so it hurts, but it needs to be done." Dr. Andrews said.

"Why can't this be done at a later time?" Hetty asked.

"It will be. His pupils will be checked every time he wakes up." Dr. Andrews said.

"Deeks." Callen said softly to him.

"I can't it hurts. I can't." Deeks said through gritted teeth and Callen knew that Deeks was beyond his breaking point.

He just woke up after being tortured for two days. This was not something he could handle. The pain level alone was too much for Deeks and Callen couldn't blame him. With all of the injuries that Deeks had the pain would be excruciating. This truly was the last thing he needed.

"What's this green button here for?" Callen asked.

"It's his pain relief." Nurse Rachel said.

Callen hit the button without even a second thought. He didn't care what tests the doctor had to do. Deeks was in too much pain to handle any more.

"Did you just hit that button?" Dr. Andrews said with some anger in his voice.

"Ya I did. He's been tortured for two days I'm not about to stand around and let you torture him some more. He's in too much pain for your test so try again later." Callen said in his team leader voice.

They all could see the pain medication kicking in as Deeks' shaking slowed down. His heart rate was going back to normal and his hands were now at his sides with his eyes closed. Callen didn't care what the doctor had to say he knew he made the right decision and he would make the same one again.

"You are risking his health. If his pupils are more dilated the skull fracture could be worse than we expected it to be." Dr. Andrews said.

"That doesn't give you the right to leave him in agony. Especially while you argue over top of him making it worse." Callen said.

"Dr. Andrews I know you are only trying to do your job, but understand so are we. We are a family and the only family Mr. Deeks has. I understand you need to run tests on him, but causing him that much pain is not acceptable. When he wakes up next do that test first, but for now he needs his rest. He's in an extreme amount of pain and we are not about to stand around and let someone cause him more. Doctor or not." Hetty said.

"Fine, but just know that your actions here is putting Detective Deeks at risk. If his skull fracture is worse than the chances of him having brain damage goes up." Dr. Andrews said.

"He's fine. He answered your questions. He pushed through the pain in his jaw to answer your questions. You can't expect him to push through the pain in his head as well after you made the pain worse. He knew his name, he knew my name and where he was. That should have been good enough for you." Kensi said.

"Well now it has to be. When he wakes up next this test will be done. Or security will escort you all out." Dr. Andrews said as he left the room with Nurse Rachel behind him.

Once the door was closed was when Kensi let out a breath. She didn't expect to get into an argument with Deeks' doctor, but she wasn't going to just stand around and let him hurt Deeks more.

"I'm sorry I know I shouldn't have argued with him, but I just couldn't let him hurt Deeks anymore." Kensi said.

"That's perfectly understandable Miss. Blye. If Mr. Callen hadn't hit that button I would have myself." Hetty said as she went to sit down in the chair on the other side of Deeks' bed.

"I've never seen him in that much pain before. Even when he was shot and came after me, he wasn't in this much pain." Kensi said.

"He's going to be in pain for a long time. We'll be here though to help him through it." Callen said.

"We do have good news. Mr. Callen was able to recover both nuclear weapons. The mission is finally complete." Hetty said.

"Good. At least all of this wasn't for nothing. I'm not sure if Deeks will see it that way, but at least its' over." Kensi said.

"The mission is over, but the healing has just begun. It's going to be a long road, but they will both recover by the end of it. I have ordered Mr. Getz back to help us all get passed what has happened. I figured Mr. Hanna and Mr. Deeks would be more comfortable speaking with him than a stranger." Hetty said.

"Except neither one of them will want to speak to him." Callen said.

"They don't have a choice. If they wish to return to duty then they need to be cleared by Mr. Getz first." Hetty said.

"Hopefully they won't fight him too much." Kensi said.

"At least for now Mr. Deeks is able to escape the pain." Hetty said.

"How's Sam?" Kensi asked.

"He's doing good. I haven't seen him today yet, but yesterday he seemed to be healing nicely. Michelle has been keeping him in bed and behaving with the doctors. I'll go see him in a few minutes. I wanted to come and see if Deeks had woken up yet. I didn't expect to walk in to him being in that much pain." Callen said.

"He just woke up and the nurse came in asking him these questions. Then the doctor came in asking more questions and the light in his eyes just pushed him over the edge. He woke up in pain, that's why the lights are off. He didn't need any more pain." Kensi said.

"He'll be okay Kens. He just needs time. Once the pain starts to go down then he'll be able to heal and get passed all of this. I'm going to go and see Sam and let him know we found the nukes." Callen said.

"Say hi to Sam for me." Kensi said.

"I will see Mr. Hanna shortly." Hetty said.

"I'll come see you later." Callen said to Kensi.

Callen headed out to go and see Sam and update him on everything. Kensi sat back down in the chair and got ready for the wait once again until Deeks would wake up.

Callen headed down the hall to where Sam's room was. When Deeks was released from the ICU they moved him so he would be on the same floor as Sam to make things easier. Sam would be allowed out of bed within the next day or so and they knew Sam would want to see Deeks as soon as he could. Callen wasn't too worried about Sam. Sam was a Navy Seal he had been in war zones and been in a position of torture. He was trained to take pain and be able to move on from it. Callen knew that once Sam got home to his family he would be okay. Callen was more worried about Deeks. Deeks was just a cop with L.A.P.D and even though Deeks was great at being a cop, he wasn't trained for this. Deeks wasn't trained to take pain and accept torture. Deeks wasn't trained to get passed being tortured and being in that type of situation. This would be a lot for anyone to handle, but especially for someone like Deeks. He didn't do well with emotions. Callen wasn't fooled by what Deeks shows everyone at work. Callen knew that underneath all that laughter and joking was a very damaged person. Callen had been in the foster care his whole life and he knew an abuse victim when he saw one. Callen knew that Deeks had been abused growing up, he didn't know to what level and he especially didn't know he had brain damage from it. Deeks had a lot of demons in his closet and Callen knew this would push Deeks over the edge. It was just a matter of time if it would be a quick nosedive or if it would be a slow downward spiral.

Callen knocked on Sam's hospital room door before he walked into the room to see Sam and Michelle playing cards. Michelle had been bouncing back and forth between the hospital and being home with the girls. She would be at the hospital all day long while the girls were in school and then around dinner time she would go home for the night. Sam didn't want the girls alone with a babysitter or with Michelle's family so he always made sure she would be home with them. The other day Michelle had brought the girls by to see Sam, but since then they hadn't been back. Sam was a strong believer that children shouldn't see their parents in the hospital. So he let them come once, but he hadn't let them come back yet. Sam would be able to leave in four days. The doctor just wanted to keep him for a week, because he was electrocuted and he wanted to make sure there were no surprises that would come up.

"Hey partner, how are you feeling?" Callen asked as he made his way over to the other side of the bed that Michelle wasn't on.

"I'm good. How is everything G? Did you find the nukes yet?" Sam asked.

"We did a few hours ago. Both were recovered. Eric and Nell are on their way home now. None of us have slept in the past three days. Ganger wanted these nukes found and he was being his usual tyrant self. But it's over the mission is finally classified as complete." Callen said.

"Good. All this mission has done is help me remember why I retired in the first place. It was fun at the first, but now I have a lot to lose." Michelle said.

"You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that." Sam said.

"Well one of us needs to be alive for our baby girls." Michelle said.

"Hey you ever need a break from the girls, you just call me and I'll have you put on a stake out." Callen said.

"G" Sam said with a warning in his voice.

"What? No one gets hurt on a stake out." Callen joked back.

"How's Deeks?" Sam asked with worry in his voice.

Sam had wanted to see Deeks for three days now, but the doctor wouldn't let him. Sam was hoping he would be able to see him shortly. He needed to talk to him and tell him how much this meant to him. Other people would have given up Michelle in a heartbeat to avoid the pain and torture. Deeks put himself through hell just so his wife would be kept safe and Sam needed to thank him for it. Sam had been all wrong about Deeks and he had to talk to him about it and make this right.

"He woke up not too long ago." Callen said.

"How was he?" Sam asked with worry all throughout his voice.

"Kensi was with him when he woke up. The lights are really hurting his eyes and that is making his head hurt. She turned the lights off for him. A nurse came in and asked him some questions, than Dr. Andrews came in and asked him more questions. When he woke up they couldn't let him have any pain mediation, because it would put him to sleep. So he was in a lot of pain. Dr. Andrews had to run a small test where he needed to look at Deeks' pupils to see if the skull fracture is worse. He had to use a pen light to look into his eyes and that made the pain worse. Hetty and I walked in just as Kensi was arguing with Dr. Andrews. Deeks was in so much pain he was shaking and his heart rate was getting up high. I've never seen him in so much pain before. He couldn't take it. Dr. Andrews said he couldn't get any pain relief until he was able to do the test." Callen said.

"They were just going to leave him in that much pain?" Sam asked with anger.

"The test was supposed to be quick, but the pain in his head from the light was too much for Deeks to handle right now. Plus the arguing wasn't helping his head any. I hit Deeks' pain relief button so the medication would be administered. Dr. Andrews was mad, but I didn't care. Deeks was asleep within minutes." Callen finished.

"That poor guy. It's not bad enough that he was tortured and is in that much pain, but the doctor is just making it worse." Michelle said.

"Deeks is tough he'll make it." Callen said.

"He might never be okay from this G. He's going to be in a lot of pain for weeks. He might never recover from this." Sam said.

"He's not doing this alone. He has us. Deeks is strong he'll make it. It's going to take him some time, but he'll get there. Hetty has called Nate back to help everyone get passed all of this." Callen said.

"I don't need to talk about what happened G. I'm fine." Sam said.

"I know you are fine and you'll be fine. You're trained for this and Deeks isn't. Hetty doesn't care though. She said if you want to be back to work you need Nate's clearance." Callen said.

"I doesn't hurt to talk about it baby. You might be trained for this, but reading about it and going through it are two different things. You can't act like this didn't happen or it won't ever go away. One day you'll explode and that can be very dangerous for you." Michelle said.

"I'm more worried about Deeks handling all of this then me. He's not trained for this and Deeks isn't exactly the type of person that could handle this." Sam said.

"He's not going to handle this well at all and I can't blame him for that. Deeks is a cop and even though he does this job as well as the rest of us he doesn't have the training we have. He didn't go through the training that you and I have. He's going to have a very hard time for a long time. He might never be the same again." Callen said.

"He's never been tortured, but growing up being abused would have been just as bad. He might handle this better than the two of you think." Michelle said.

"Maybe." Callen said.

"I need to see him." Sam said.

"He's asleep right now and I don't think he'll be awake any time soon." Callen said.

"I need to apologise to him G. I should never have said those things to him. I should have seen underneath all those jokes. I should never have judged him and given him such a hard time. I didn't like that he was just a cop and I thought he didn't have the training for this job. I should have just worked with him and gave him the training. Instead of belittling him and giving him crap every time he did something that I didn't think was good enough. I should have worked with him. I'm the training agent it's my job to make sure everyone is at the same level. I should have done everything different with Deeks." Sam said.

"You can do that now. You can't change the past, but you can change your relationship with Deeks now. You can be that training agent that I know you can be. Take the time to get to know Deeks and maybe we all can be a team and a family like we should be." Callen said.

"There is one thing you have to consider. Deeks might not want to be with NCIS anymore. He could just go back to L.A.P.D." Michelle said.

"I never even thought about that." Callen admitted.

"He can't go back there; they treat him like shit there. Cops hate Deeks for whatever reason. It's not safe for Deeks to be going undercover without any backup or a proper backstop done. Deeks is safer with us and he belongs with us. He can't go back." Sam said.

"Deeks will fight through this and he will be perfectly fine. It's going to take some time, but he'll get there. We just need to be patient with him and offer any support we can." Callen said.

"Come on Callen, come play some cards. It's the only way to stay sane in a hospital." Michelle said.

Callen pulled up a chair and sat down to play with his partner and his partner's wife. Callen didn't know what the future was going to hold, but he was hoping that the team would survive this.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX

Deeks had been in the hospital for two weeks now and he was driving Kensi insane. Deeks was never good with hospitals, he had seen them too many times growing up. He just wanted to go home where he could be with Monty and in his own bed. The hospital food sucked, not that he wanted to eat anyways. His jaw hurt no matter what he did so if he had to put himself through the pain of eating he wanted something more than nasty hospital food. Kensi had often snuck him in milkshakes and soup from his favorite restaurant. Deeks was trying his best to be patient with Kensi and nice, but at times he just wanted to be left alone. He wanted to go home where he could just be alone and figure things out. His body was in pain and he was always exhausted. He just didn't want to be here anymore. He was tired of nurses asking him questions and poking at him. He was tired of the florescent lights hurting his eyes. He was tired of constantly being around people. What he was most tired of was Sam trying to see him. For that first week and a half Deeks couldn't even talk from the pain being so bad. Sam had come by at the end of the first week to speak to him, but Deeks wasn't going to deal with any of it. He didn't want to see Sam, he didn't want to talk to Sam and he most definitely didn't want to hear what Sam had to say to him. Deeks was pissed off at Sam and he wasn't afraid to show it. Everyone knew that Deeks was pissed at Sam and Kensi had even told Sam that it would be better to wait to speak to him. Deeks wasn't mad that because of Sam he was tortured. Deeks wasn't mad that Sam only got a little bit of torture and was walking out of the hospital a week later perfectly fine. What Deeks was so mad about was what Sam had said to him just days before they were tortured. Deeks wasn't in the mood to tell Sam it was all okay. Deeks wasn't in the mood to lie and make Sam feel better. Deeks just wanted to go home and be in his own house, sleeping in his own bed with his own food. That's all he wanted.

So at the end of week two when Hetty walked into his hospital room he knew he could get out of here. He had been alone for a few hours after he forced Kensi to leave so she could go home and shower and sleep. Callen had been looking after Monty for him, because Kensi was spending all her time at the hospital with Deeks. Callen didn't mind looking after Monty and Deeks was appreciative of him for it. Deeks was now on a pain pill to help when he needed it with the pain. The pain was still bad and Deeks took the maximum dosage each and every time he was allowed to take a pill, but at least it was an improvement. Hetty sat down in the chair beside the bed to speak to Deeks. He had yet to speak to Nate about what happened, but she couldn't blame him. Up until a few days ago Deeks wasn't really talking much. His jaw hurt and moving it always made the pain level go up. So she had let him not talk to Nate, but Nate had been by to see him so Deeks would get used to him being around again.

"How are you doing Mr. Deeks?" Hetty asked.

"Hetty, I want to go home." Deeks said softly while he looked at Hetty.

"I know Marty. The doctor is worried about the pain level going up, once you are moving around more at home."

"I'm on pain medication. Hetty I don't have an infection, my stitches are fine, I'm eating food and I've been moving around. I can't be here anymore. Please let me go home."

Hetty let out a sigh. She knew this conversation would be coming sooner rather than later. She couldn't blame Deeks for wanting to be out of the hospital and back at home. Deeks was not the type of person that liked being in hospitals. He had been in his fair share of them growing up and each one had a worse memory than the next. The problem was she was worried about Deeks being home alone. He had yet to speak to Sam or Nate and she knew that wasn't a good thing.

"I'll make you a deal Mr. Deeks. Mr. Getz is out in the hallway, he wants to speak to you. If you give him an hour with you and you talk. You don't have to talk about what happened, but you just talk. I will go and speak to your doctor and have you sprung. I need to know that you are going to start talking about this. You can't burry what happened to you like you did with things growing up. You show me that you are willing to start the process then I will have you home tonight. Do we have a deal?"

"Deal."

Deeks didn't even have to think about it. If he could be home tonight and talking to Nate for an hour was the price he had to pay then he would pay it. Nate wasn't that bad and he knew when not to push Deeks on a topic. Deeks could also stall for time by asking how his life had been since the last time they saw him.

"Very well I will send in Mr. Getz and I will speak to your doctor." Hetty said as she got up.

"Thank-you Hetty."

Hetty left the room and closed the door behind her. She wanted a word with Nate first before sending him in. She knew that Deeks wouldn't talk about being tortured so soon after it happened. However, she was hoping for some insight on how Deeks and Sam's relationship was. She could get that through Nate. She had spoken to Sam and he had said he tried to see Deeks, but Deeks doesn't want to see him. Maybe now she will get Deeks' side of the story and see if she could repair the damage. Nate was standing off to the side by the nurses' desk waiting to see if he would be able to speak to Deeks or not. He had seen Deeks a few times in the last week since he had returned, but Deeks didn't say much. Nate knew about his injuries so he knew that his jaw would be hurting and talking would be making it worse. In the last few days Deeks had been talking more so he was hoping to get some time with him. Hetty went over to Nate so she could speak to him.

"He has agreed to speak to you for an hour. I made a deal with him that if he spoke to you for an hour then I would speak to his doctor about him being released. His jaw is still very painful and talking will hurt so be patient with him." Hetty said.

"We won't get into too much today. I don't want to scare him away." Nate said.

"See if you can find out how he feels about what Mr. Hanna said." Hetty said.

"Sam said that he questioned Deeks' character a few days before they were taken. Has Deeks talked about it with anyone?" Nate asked.

"He has not brought it up; he just refuses to see Mr. Hanna. Maybe you can find out why." Hetty suggested.

"I'll do my best."

"That's all I have ever asked of you. I will see you in an hour. I have a doctor to find." Hetty said.

Nate just gave a smile as he headed over to Deeks' hospital room. He knocked on the door first before he entered to see Deeks sitting up in bed. He was no longer wearing the hospital gown, but he was wearing scrubs. It was easier for the hospital staff if an emergency happened if Deeks was wearing scrubs or a gown. Deeks had opted for the scrubs as soon as they were offered to him. Nate went over to the side of the bed and sat down in the chair.

"How are you feeling Marty?"

"Getting better. Each day that passes the pain lessens so that helps. Jaw and head still hurt a lot though."

"Skull fractures are very dangerous and take a long time to heal. You basically broke you head that's not easy to heal from. You're on a pain pill now though, so that's good."

"Ya"

"Marty I know you are not one for talking about your emotions and life experiences. I'm not going to make you talk about what happened. I know it's still too early for that. So we can talk about whatever you want. You know as team psychologist that I have read your file that Hetty has as well as the others. So we can talk about your past if you want." Nate said.

"I don't talk about growing up." Deeks said.

"Okay. How is everything going with Kensi?" Nate asked.

"Fine. She's been here every day with me."

"Have you two crossed the lines between partners and romantic partners?" Nate asked.

"Kensi is my partner. Apparently that is all we are going to be."

"Why do you say that? Did something happen?"

"I kissed her before all of this happened." Deeks said. He always found it easy to talk to Nate. He didn't judge.

"Really? Good for you. What did she do?"

"She ran away. I know she had to follow Michelle, but she could have said something. She does what she always does, she ran. We haven't spoken about it since."

"Kensi has some emotional problems since her fiancé Jack left her. She's afraid to give her heart to someone. She cares about you or she wouldn't be here every day. Callen is not here with Sam all day every day. She's not doing this because she is your partner. She is doing this, because she cares. I think when you are ready you need to have that conversation with her. Don't be quick to think she doesn't care. You know Kensi better than anyone. When you are ready you need to talk to her about it and see what she has to say about it."

"Maybe"

"How do you feel towards Callen after all of this? He trusted Janvier to help you buy these nukes and because of him you and Sam were taken. How are you feeling towards Callen?"

"Callen made a choice and he took a risk. We didn't know that Sidorov and Janvier knew each other. Callen trusted his gut and it didn't work out. It could have happened to any of us."

"So you have no hard feelings towards Callen?"

"No. He was put in a tough position. He had to make a choice and he did. It could have happened to anyone of us. It's not his fault this could have worked out just fine."

"So then why are you so mad at Sam?"

"Who said I was mad?" Deeks asked.

"You have seen Kensi, you've seen Callen, and you've seen Eric and Nell. You refuse to see Sam. That tells me that you are mad at him. Why are you mad at him?" Nate asked gently.

"I have a right to be mad at him." Deeks said with a slight anger to his voice.

"I haven't known you to get angry for no reason. I'm sure you have a very good reason. Is it because of what you went through together? That he's out of the hospital and healthy?"

"No. I'm glad he's fine. I don't want him to suffer or to die."

"Okay, so why are you so angry at him?"

Deeks took a deep breath to calm himself down and to give his mouth a few minutes of rest. He wasn't good with words and he knew Nate would do his best to understand, but that didn't mean he was able to put his thoughts into words. Nate didn't say anything he just sat there waiting for when Deeks would be ready to talk again. After a few minutes Deeks spoke.

"I've been working with them for three years. I've saved each and every one of their lives. I've been on operations and held my own just like them. All the while Sam has done nothing, but belittles me and gives me crap all day every day. So a few days before everything happened we were partnered up. I asked him why he treats me the way that he does. And he tells me it's because of my character. He's a seal so that makes him better than the cop from a broken home. Three years I have kept Kensi safe and unharmed. I have watched Callen's back and made sure he was covered and safe same with Sam. Yet nothing I did was good enough for him, because I'm a cop. So ya I'm pissed, because for three years I have taken his crap only for him to tell me that I'm not good enough, that my character isn't good enough for him. I don't care what he has to say and I don't want to hear it. I'm not in the mood to lie to make him feel better."

"You have every right to feel this way. You have every right to be angry at him and not speak to him until you are ready. He insulted your character; he's given you a hard time for three years all for nothing. You get to be mad and you get to take as long as you need before you have that conversation with him. I think you need to talk about it with him and both of you need to clear the air. I'm sure there is a lot he wants to tell you."

"I don't want to hear any of it. If I want to feel like I don't belong and be treated like crap I would be back at L.A.P.D."

"Is that something you are considering?"

"I can't even think about going back to work right now."

"Fair enough. How do you feel about going home?"

"That's all I can think about. I just want to be home."

"Why? Besides the obvious reason of not being in a hospital."

"I miss Monty. I want to be home and sleep in my own bed without someone waking me up every three hours. I want to be able to lie in bed all day and just watch tv or a movie. What I want the most though, is sitting on my balcony and looking out at the beach. I know I can't surf, but just being at the beach and seeing it always makes me feel at home. The beach has been the only home I've ever had. It's always been there for me. It's sad, but it makes me feel better. It makes me feel like I can breathe."

Nate didn't say anything to that. He knew that Deeks didn't have much growing up and the beach had been his safety, his escape from reality. Nate wasn't too sure about Deeks being home alone, but after hearing him he had to agree that the best place for Deeks would be at his home.

"I think that is enough for today. I can tell that your jaw is giving you a lot of pain from talking. So that's enough for today. I'll go and see if Hetty was able to manipulate your doctor into letting you go." Nate said lightly.

"If she can't do it no one can."

Nate got up as he spoke. "I'll see you later Marty. I'll come and visit you when you are home and we can continue talking. Feel better Marty."

"Thanks Doc."

Nate left Deeks' hospital room to go and find Hetty to tell her what happened. Nate found Hetty speaking with Dr. Andrews just down the hall.

"Mr. Getz, how did it go?" Hetty asked.

"It went well."

"I was just speaking to Dr. Andrews about Mr. Deeks leaving. He doesn't think it is a good idea. What is your medical opinion on it?" Hetty asked.

"I'm not a medical doctor, but mentally and emotionally speaking. It is my psychological opinion that Detective Deeks needs to be home. His apartment is right on the beach; he's a surfer and has always found comfort in the beach and the water. For Detective Deeks to heal emotionally and mentally he needs to be home." Nate said.

"I can understand that, but physically he is still in a lot of pain. I think he needs to be here for another week at least." Dr. Andrews said.

"Dr. Andrews, what is the difference of Mr. Deeks being at home in his own bed then being here? The pain will still be the same level no matter where he is. Why not let him be comfortable." Hetty said.

"Why do I have a feeling I am not going to win this argument?" Dr. Andrews said.

"Because Mr. Deeks could just check himself out A.M.A. He needs to be home and I agree that that is the best place for him." Hetty said.

Dr. Andrews let out a sigh. "Alright, I will prepare his release forms and he can leave in an hour or so. I will also give him a list of how to take care of his stitches."

"Thank you Doctor." Hetty said.

Dr. Andrews left so he could prepare for Deeks' release from the hospital.

"How did it really go Mr. Getz?" Hetty asked once they were alone.

"Marty was cooperative. We just spoke about his relationship with Callen, Kensi and Sam. Things between him and Kensi are a little awkward right now."

"Because of the kiss." Hetty stated.

"How did you know?" Nate asked with confusion.

"I know everything Mr. Getz that happens with my agents. Maybe next time Mr. Deeks kisses Miss. Blye he won't have the com-link on." Hetty said.

"And you are okay with two of your agents possibly having a romantic relationship?"

"It has been coming for a long time now. At first I wasn't too happy about it, but they make each other happy. I'm fine with it now. I want them both to be happy."

"Well they are both ignoring the kiss right now. Kensi is being her usual self by running from the issue and Marty is being his usual self by pretending like nothing happened. I do believe that he needs to be home where he feels safe and comfortable." Nate said.

"I completely agree. How does he feel towards Mr. Callen and Mr. Hanna?"

"He's not mad at Callen. He thinks he made a choice that any of them could have made. It was either going to go either way and based on the situation Callen didn't have much of a choice. Sam is a completely different topic. He's very mad at Sam, but it has nothing to do with the torture. He's mad that Sam called his character untrustworthy. He feels like for the last three years he's taken Sam's crap and Sam's belittling, thinking that at the end of it all that Sam would accept him into the team. Except he finds out that Sam was doing that, because he doesn't trust or like Marty's character and for Marty that's the last straw. He feels that Sam is looking down on him as a seal, because he's a cop from a broken home. Marty said that if he wanted to be hated and belittled he would be working for L.A.P.D. He's stayed with NCIS, because he thought he was on a team that accepted him and that he finally found a place where he belonged. Much like Callen, Marty wants a home and a place to belong more than anything in this world. He didn't say it, but you could tell over the last three years that he looked up to Sam and saw him as an older brother figure. To find out that Sam didn't trust him and all that belittling was for nothing. Sam truly didn't like Marty and for Marty that hurts more than he is saying."

"Mr. Hanna has a lot of work to do to repair this damaged relationship. Is he thinking about going back to L.A.P.D?"

"He said he wasn't thinking about work at all. He's not ready to cross that bridge yet. I think Marty and Sam need to talk and I don't think he should wait until Marty is ready. The longer Sam waits to speak with Marty the angrier he is going to get. They need to talk this out before it tears the team apart."

"I'll speak to Mr. Hanna about this. I will also call Miss. Blye so she can come and take Mr. Deeks home. I'm sure she will be happy to hear that Mr. Deeks can leave."

"I told Marty that I would come and see him within the week to speak more about everything."

"Was he fine with that?"

"He was. I'm not sure how easy it will be to get him to open up about what happened. He's not used to being able to talk about how he feels and what he thinks without being reprimanded or judged. Hopefully he opens up to me."

"I'm sure with a little patience and some time he will open up to you. Thank-you Mr. Getz."

"I'm happy to be here to help them out any way that I can."

"I know; that's why I called you back."

Nate just smiled as Hetty turned so she could call Kensi to let her know that Deeks could go home.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX

It was another long three hours for Deeks, but finally he was home. Kensi had come back to the hospital once she found out that Deeks was able to leave. She didn't bring any clothes for him, because she knew once he got home he would want to shower and get changed. Deeks never wanted his clothes to smell like a hospital. She had remembered him telling her that when he was in the hospital after being shot. Deeks didn't even waste any time he told Kensi that he was going to shower and Kensi said she was just going to watch tv. She knew that Deeks would be going to bed after taking a shower. He was still exhausted, because of the pain and the pain medication. So Kensi just hung out while Deeks showered and slept. It wasn't until seven o'clock at night did Deeks finally wake up and come out of the bedroom.

"You're still here?" Deeks asked confused.

"You didn't actually think I was going to leave you alone tonight did you?" Kensi said.

"Kens I'm fine. You don't need to babysit me."

"Good, because I'm here with my partner making sure he is okay for tonight. I'll leave you alone tomorrow, but tonight you are stuck with me. So how about some food?"

Deeks went over to the couch and sat down.

"Not hungry."

"Thirsty?"

"Ya"

"How about some water?"

"Sure

Kensi got up and headed into the kitchen to get Deeks a bottle of water. When she had found out that Deeks was going to be released from the hospital she went to the grocery store to get Deeks some food. She came back into the living room and handed Deeks the water bottle as she sat down.

"I went to the store for you and got you some food for the next week. I figured you wouldn't be up for it."

"Thanks"

"Any time. You'd do the same for me."

"In a heartbeat, but I better not have to."

"With a partner like you, I won't have to worry."

Monty came over to them from the bedroom. Kensi had picked him up on the way to the hospital. Monty went over and laid down right by Deeks' feet.

"Someone missed you."

"I missed him. You see the same person every day for years then all of a sudden that person isn't there anymore, it's depressing. I miss having him around."

"Well now you two can play all day together." Kensi said with a smile.

There was a knock at the door and Kensi and Deeks looked at each other.

"Expecting company?" Deeks asked Kensi.

"No, you?"

"No"

Kensi got up and she went to the door. She opened it to reveal Sam on the other side. Kensi turned to look at Deeks and she could tell he wasn't in the mood for this. Sam didn't care though; he wasn't going to be ignored anymore. Sam walked into Deeks' apartment and Kensi knew that he wasn't leaving until they talked.

"Why don't I take Monty for a walk?"

Kensi suggested as she grabbed Monty's leash. At the clicking sound of the leash Monty's head popped up and he headed straight for Kensi. Kensi clicked the leash on Monty's collar and then looked at Deeks. Deeks gave a nod and Kensi headed out closing the door behind him. The room was full of awkward intensity that neither man knew how to break. Sam knew that Deeks was mad at him, but he thought it was more towards the torture and not his character comment. He knew Deeks was mad about that, but he had no idea just how mad Deeks was.

"What do you want Sam?" Deeks asked with anger in his voice.

"Deeks, look I know you're pissed at me and I don't blame you. I questioned your character, and it was my fault that you were tortured. You risked your life to save mine and my wife's. I can never repay you enough for what you did for my family."

"Are you done?" Deeks asked rudely.

"Deeks we have to talk about this. This won't just go away on its own. Deeks we need to talk about this."

"What exactly is it that you think we need to talk about?" Deeks asked rudely again.

"It's my fault for what happened to you. Deeks you were tortured, because you protected my wife. I know we had a little fight a few days before and I was wrong for what I said to you. I'm sorry this happened."

"See that's the problem you actually thought I was going to give Michelle up. That I would put another Agent's life on the line. That I would risk Sidorov disappearing with the nukes and selling them before we had a chance to get him. You actually thought I was that weak that I would risk the fate of the world, because of some pain. That's why I'm pissed off at you Sam. You thought that little of me to think I would risk the world's safety. I'm pissed, because you insulted my character. You act like you're better than me, because you're a navy seal and I'm just some cop from a broken home. You belittle me for three years all, because you were nothing but a judgemental asshole. You could have helped me. When I did something that you didn't think was safe or good enough you could have said something to me. Callen took me aside after our first take down and told me how L.A.P.D has different protocols then NCIS does. He gave me a book so I could read up on NCIS protocols so we are all on the same page. He actually tried to help me, when you were the training agent, but I was never good enough for you. So excuse me if I don't want to hear your bullshit sorry or your bullshit excuses. I don't want to hear it. Get the hell out of my house." Deeks said with a deadly calm anger to his voice.

"Deeks" Sam said gently hoping he would be able to reason with him.

"I said get out!" Deeks yelled.

Sam was shocked that Deeks had yelled. It wasn't often when he lost his temper and Sam knew it took a lot for Deeks to reach that point. Sam knew he shouldn't be pushing Deeks right now so he would respect his wishes and leave. Sam walked out of the apartment and closed the door behind him. Deeks was pissed off that Sam would just show up at his apartment unannounced and acting like he knew what was bothering him. Deeks was pissed and he truly didn't know if he wanted to be back with NCIS and dealing with Sam's shit again. Deeks wasn't foolish enough to think that things would be different. He knew that Sam would never think differently of him. Deeks was pissed and he knew he needed to calm down so he got up and headed out to his balcony. He sat down on the comfy bench that he bought a couple years ago. The fresh air was nice, it was a little cool from being close to the water, but Deeks loved the view. The moonlight always made the water glow.

It was another fifteen minutes before Kensi came back inside with Monty. She wanted to give Deeks and Sam enough time together and she only came in, because she saw that Sam's charger was no longer out front. She let Monty off his leash and then went to see if Deeks went back to bed. She went and saw that he was actually on the balcony so Kensi grabbed a blanket from the couch and headed out with Monty behind her.

"Hey partner." Kensi said as she sat down and put the blanket over them both. She curled her legs up and turned her body slightly so she could put her head on Deeks' shoulder.

"Hey" Deeks said and Kensi could hear that he was upset.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kensi asked with concern.

"Nope."

Kensi looked down to see Monty curled up in the other corner of the balcony.

"You ever want to talk I'll be here for you."

"I know."

Kensi let out a comfortable sigh as she curled up closer into Deeks. She couldn't believe how beautiful the beach looked in the moonlight. Most of the time they were at her place after work. They had never been here at night and Kensi couldn't believe that she had missed this.

"This is beautiful. No wonder you love this apartment so much."

"I've spent a lot of nights just sitting out here. After a bad operation or after a long undercover it's nice to just sit here all day or night. It makes me feel better. It makes me feel at home."

"It's comforting and soothing out here. I can see why this would be your favorite thing to do. I could sit here all night just listening to the waves."

"I was thinking about getting a little fire pit, so when it's cold I can warm the area up."

"That would be cool. It would definitely help keep it warmer."

Deeks moved his arm so he could bring Kensi in closer to him. Kensi curled up to Deeks' chest and they sat outside all night just watching the waves and watching the sunrise. It was going to be a long couple of months, but Kensi wasn't going to give up on Deeks. She was going to be there for him through thick and thin no matter what. Deeks was her partner and the man that she loved. She was not going to let him go through this on his own. No matter how bad it got.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

It had been twelve weeks, twelve long weeks of pure hell for Deeks. He woke up in the hospital three days after the rescue and he felt nothing, but pain for the first month and a half. Everything hurt, but especially his jaw. Having your jaw broken in six places was no light matter. Every time he talked it hurt. Every time he tried to eat it hurt. He couldn't go surfing because of the stiches and because of his wrist. He couldn't stop the nightmares from attacking him every night and to top it off he couldn't avoid the endless questions from the Nate and Kensi. Deeks didn't want to talk about what happened, but he really didn't want to talk about growing up even more. After six weeks of listening to their endless pressure and questions Deeks snapped at them to leave him alone. He couldn't handle his childhood and the last thing he wanted to do was to talk about it. For six weeks all he heard were questions about his childhood and them telling him that he needed to talk about it. He couldn't take it anymore and he finally snapped at Nate, Callen and Kensi when they were in his apartment. They didn't come by for a week and Deeks felt bad that he had snapped at them, but he just couldn't help it. With everything going on the last thing he wanted to do was listen to questions about his childhood. They had found out that he had brain damage and Hetty had explained what happened. Deeks was ashamed and embarrassed that they had found out he was abused growing up, but he took some relief that they didn't know his whole story.

When Nate, Kensi and Callen showed up a week later Deeks had apologised for the outburst and they had told him they understood. They apologised for pushing him so hard and they promised they wouldn't do it again. They just wanted him back so bad that they didn't realise that they were pushing him too hard. Callen had come by to see him fairly often at least 3 times a week. Sam had tried to come by with Callen or with Kensi, but Deeks never spoke to him. He tried to be friendly, but he truly was still hurt and angry at Sam. Sam knew that Deeks wasn't happy with him and still didn't want him around. Sam couldn't just ignore Deeks though, not after what happened and not after what Sam found out about his childhood. Sam had made a silent promise to himself to help Deeks get over his childhood horrors. Sam never realised just how many problems Deeks had internally. When Sam thought back about it Deeks always made fun of himself, he always took what they said to him to heart. He always put himself down and he didn't know how to take a compliment. Sam never thought about it, but now that he was he wanted to help Deeks. He truly was a good man and Sam didn't think he should have to deal with his demons on his own. If Sam could help him overcome some of the things that happened to him, then Sam was willing to go through hell to do it. Sam felt like he owed Deeks his life and his family. If it wasn't for Deeks, Sam would have been dead in that pool. Deeks saved his life and he risked his life to save his and his wife's. Sam owed him the world and he wasn't going to let him down.

Kensi had been the one to push Deeks even when he didn't want to do anything. She had been spending a lot of time in Deeks' apartment, but she also made sure to give him some space. She wasn't going to leave him alone with all of this. She was going to see him through, because she cared and she felt guilty. She knew she had to follow Michelle, but that didn't mean she didn't feel guilty for not having his back. He was her partner and she should have been there with him to protect him. He had always been there for her even when she didn't want him to be. He never took no for an answer and she wasn't going to either with this. She had been there for when the pain was so extreme he could barely move. She had been there for the nightmares. She had been there for when he was depressed. She had been there sitting on the beach with him at three in the morning, because he was too afraid to sleep. She had been there when he had to go to the dentist for his teeth and he had a panic attack. She had been there the whole time to hold his hand and comfort him when he needed it. There had been many nights that they had fallen asleep in his bed curled up in each other's arms. They never spoke about the kiss. They did what they always did and acted like it never happened. Kensi wanted to talk about it, but she didn't know how well Deeks would be able to handle it. She was going to bring it up once he seemed like he was back to his old self.

Over the last twelve weeks Deeks had been slowly starting to come back to his old self, but he was still a long ways away. He still didn't talk much, he rarely smiled a true smile and he didn't tell any jokes. Hetty had made sure once Deeks was awake that he was speaking with Nate and he was talking about it with him regularly, but he refused to talk about it with Kensi. They knew it was going to take more than just three months for Deeks to get over what happened. It was understandable after everything that happened to him. Sam was in therapy with Nate for a good ten weeks before he was cleared by Nate for active duty. Sam had been back to work for two weeks now and he felt better being back to a job that he loved. It had taken them three straight endless days before they finally found the remaining nuclear bombs. Sidorov refused to talk and ever since he came out of surgery he was in one of the highest secured prison in this world. In the end they had won, but it came with a great price.

Now twelve weeks later the three agents were waiting for Deeks to come into Ops. It was going to be his first day back and he was stuck on desk duty for a few more weeks. His right wrist was in a brace; once the cast came off the doctor still wasn't too happy about how it had healed. His ribs were doing much better, his stab wounds had healed nicely and his brain was completely healed from the skull fracture and bruising. Deeks and the team were thrilled when they found out that he did not have any further brain damage done from the torture. He was only slightly sore and his wounds had healed nicely. Nate had cleared him for desk duty and Deeks didn't argue with him. Deeks was the one to admit to Nate that he just wasn't ready for active duty yet. He had also said the same thing to Bates and Bates was more than sympathetic and was giving Deeks all the time he needed. Hetty had informed Bates that Deeks had been tortured. Bates was not happy to hear that one of his best undercovers was in the hospital seriously injured and traumatized. Bates had had many inner debates with himself about terminating the L.A.P.D liaison position. He didn't like that Deeks had been tortured and he had plans of speaking to Deeks when he was ready for active duty about coming back to L.A.P.D full time. It was just after nine thirty in the morning when Deeks walked into the bullpen.

"Hey Deeks welcome back." Sam said.

"If you count desk duty as back." Deeks said as he went over to his desk. He put his bag down and sat down in his chair.

"It counts as back." Callen said seriously so Deeks knew he was more than welcome.

"It's good to have you back partner." Kensi said with a smile.

"How you feeling Deeks?" Sam asked.

"I'm fine."

The three agents looked at each other and you could see the concern on their faces. Deeks was clearly still upset with Sam. Sam had tried to repair the damage, but Deeks just wasn't having any of it. Deeks had tolerated Sam coming around with Callen or with Kensi, but he didn't really talk to him. They all started to work on paperwork and small talk for a good three hours before Deeks' cell phone rang and Deeks didn't recognize the number.

"Hello."

Deeks didn't want to say Detective Deeks, because he didn't know who was on the other end. If it turned out to be someone he was undercover for then there would be a serious problem.

"Yes may I speak with Mr. Martin Deeks please?" The gentle female voice said.

"Speaking"

"I have a collect call from a Mary Deeks. Do you accept the charges?"

Deeks put his hand on his forehead and gently rubbed it in frustration.

"Ya put her through."

The three agents could tell that Deeks was not happy about whoever was on the other end of the phone call. They all did their best to make it seem like they weren't listening to the conversation, but they were failing miserably. Ever since Deeks had been tortured the three of them became very protective of him. Deeks was not the weakest one in the group, but he was the most traumatised one. They didn't want anything to make him worse. They wanted to help Deeks get better not sit around and watch him get worse.

"Martin, are you there?" Came the rush female voice.

"What did you do now?"

Deeks was clearly not impressed by this phone call. It got the attention of all three agents. Deeks had been through hell these past twelve weeks and they didn't want him going through anymore. They could tell by his body language and tone of voice that he wasn't in the mood for this phone call.

"Martin please I need your help. Your father and I are in jail…"

"He's not my father." Deeks said immediately.

"He is your father. He adopted you and took you in. You need to come down to the court house and get us out. I'm your mother you can't just abandon me."

"Did it ever cross your mind that maybe, just maybe, I might have a problem that I would like to call you and tell you about? Did it ever cross your mind that maybe I might need your help?" Deeks snapped.

"Is there something wrong?"

"Nope I'm fine." Deeks said knowing that telling his mother about what happened would be pointless.

"Then why did you even bring that up? You make it sound like I didn't raise you." Mary said getting more annoyed and angry.

"What did you do now?"

The others could tell that Deeks was getting upset, but not in an angry way. They could see the hurt in his eyes and that just increased their curiosity.

"I wasn't doing anything wrong I swear. That asshole detective arrested me, because I wouldn't turn against your father. The court hearing is in two hours Martin, baby you need to come and get us out. You're an attorney you do this all the time."

"I'm not an attorney anymore. I don't know how many times I've told you that I'm a detective now. Have been for eight years."

"So you can still get us out. Call that asshole detective and get us out. He had no right to arrest me or your father."

"You still haven't told me what you did to get arrested."

"I don't know what happened. He had no right to arrest either one of us."

"What detective?" Deeks asked knowing he could contact the detective and get more answers than he could speaking with his mother.

"Detective Walker. He was an asshole to me and your father."

"Stop calling him my father."

"Will you come down here baby and get us out?"

"That depends on what you did. I'll call the detective and see why he arrested you both."

"Thank- you baby I can always count on you. You're such a good son."

Deeks didn't even reply he just hung up and he was clearly not impressed by any of this. He had been through enough and had enough problems he didn't need his mother's to add to his.

"Everything okay partner?" Kensi asked with concern in her voice.

"Fucking perfect." Deeks whispered.

That got everyone's attention. Deeks never swore, especially at work. Deeks dialed his precinct number. Detective Walker worked at the same precinct that he did and had worked with him on a few cases. After a minute the desk clerk answered.

"Los Angeles police department. How may I direct your call?"

"Hey Marcy. Its Deeks, is Walker in?"

"He is I'll pass you through."

"Thanks"

After a few seconds Walker answered the phone.

"Detective Walker."

"Hey Walker."

"Deeks, I was about to call you. I'm assuming you found out that your parents were arrested."

"She just called me. What happened?"

"You near a computer?"

"Ya I'm at my desk."

"I sent you an email with some case files in it. Just a brief overview of them. I was going to call you and see what you thought about them."

"What are they?"

Deeks opened his laptop and started to check his email. There was a message from Walker and he opened it and started to read it. It was brief and just the main points of the operation, but Deeks could see where this was going.

"Last night patrol got a call to this rundown shady bar called Last Stop. When we got there a female was beaten up pretty bad. Jason Deeks was the one who had attacked her. Your mother was there to witness the attack and according to her Jason did nothing wrong. We spoke to the victim at the hospital, she's still in the hospital and her bill is almost ten grand so far. She had to have surgery for some internal bleeding. We spoke to her before they took her into surgery. According to her she was talking to Jason and Mary got upset and started calling her names and getting mad at Jason. Apparently she thought Jason shouldn't have been hitting on the victim back. Jason got upset that Mary was calling him names and then they both went outside. The victim was outside for a smoke and Jason lost it on her and attacked her. Mary was there watching the whole thing and was apparently encouraging Jason. We arrested both of them and Mary refused to talk same as Jason."

"Is she going to be okay?"

"The doctor said she will make a full recovery. Jason was obviously drunk, but your mother was drunk and very high. She had an ounce of heroin on her. She also had outstanding warrants for prostitution and drug possession."

"Okay, what does that have to do with what you sent me?"

"I have been working on this case for just over a year now. There is a new cartel working their way up the food chain. They started off as small time and now they are killing the higher cartels in Mexico and in LA. We have evidence that they have been stealing military grade weapons and selling them overseas to the highest bidder. I'm talking rocket launchers, machine guns, sniper rifles, automatics, grenades, even materials for making bombs. We know it's them, but we have no evidence to arrest them. They are unbelievably tight lipped and they won't betray anyone in the cartel. I can't even get someone to turn on the little fish. Jason has been seen with a few drug runners for the cartel. Before last night I was going to call you this morning and see if NCIS could lend a hand. Now that we have Jason if we can get him to talk we might be able to get some evidence against them."

"You want me to get them out." Deeks stated.

"I don't want to drop the charges against Jason for what he did to that poor woman. The problem is if he stays in jail I won't be able to flip him. There's no guarantee that he'll even talk, but he might talk to you. The choice is yours Deeks."

"Are you pressing charges or is the victim pressing charges?"

"I did. There really was no other choice."

"I can get them out on bail. I could try talking to the victim and see if there is some way to settle this outside of court. If Jason refuses to cooperate then he can just go right back into jail for aggravated assault and affiliation."

"Are you comfortable with doing this Deeks?"

"From what you've told me and what I just read it has to be done. This cartel is too dangerous to leave on the street. Are you going to court?"

"Yes I have to be there."

"Okay, bring all the case files you have on these guys and I'll see you there."

"Do you think NCIS will pick this up?"

"Ya we'll do it and keep you in the loop. You've been doing this for a year now I'm not gonna just cut you out."

"Thanks Deeks. I'll see you at court."

"Yup"

Deeks hung up his phone and could see the other three staring at him. He let out a sigh and he knew he would need to explain.

"Go upstairs to Ops I'll grab Hetty and explain then."

Deeks got up and headed over to Hetty's desk and the other three went upstairs. They knew it was something big for Deeks to accept a case without even consulting them on it. A few minutes later Deeks and Hetty came into Ops.

"Alright last night Mary and Jason Deeks were arrested for assaulting a woman at a bar."

"And who are they to you?" Callen asked.

"Mary is my mother and Jason is my step-father. The victim was taken to the hospital and had to have surgery. She is still in the hospital and her bill is already ten grand from the level of damage that was done to her. Detective Walker arrested them both and both refused to talk. They are both going up for bail in less than two hours. Detective Walker for the past year has been tracking this new cartel called Los ángeles de Satanás, translated it means Satan's Angels. They operate out of Mexico and LA. They started off small, but over the year they have grown and started to kill the cartels that are higher up on the food chain then them. They kill the top dog and anyone who refuses to follow the new leader. Those that decide to live they are forced to join them. You can imagine how fast their numbers increased in just a year. Detective Walker hasn't been able to get any evidence against them for any of their crimes. They are suspected in homicides; drug trafficking, drug making, prostitution and now arms traffickers. They have stolen military grade weapons that vary from grenades to rocket launchers and have been selling them to the highest bidder overseas. Jason has been seen with some of the small drug runners within the cartel. Detective Walker was going to contact NCIS to see if they were willing to help. He's been doing this for a year and he literally has nothing to arrest them on and the death pool is increasing rapidly."

"He wants to flip Jason." Sam stated.

"He can't justifiably drop the charges against Jason, because of the level of the assault. However, if I can get him out on bail and talk to the victim I might be able to get her to settle this outside of court. He wants to see if we can flip Jason into giving us something we can use to arrest them. If nothing else he's hoping for a way into the cartel so he can send in an undercover."

"Why was this never reported? They had to have stolen these weapons from some base or factory. Why were we never informed?" Callen said.

"Mr. Beale, check any records going back this year for any weapons stolen on or off base. Check all of California that might be how they went under our radar." Hetty said.

"On it."

"Also see what you can find out about this cartel." Callen said.

Eric and Nell went to work on trying to gather any information they could find.

"Is Detective Walker meeting you down at the court house?" Callen asked.

"Ya he's gonna bring the case files he has on this cartel."

"Are you okay with this?" Callen asked.

"I'm fine."

"Very well. The four of you head down to the court house and bring everyone down to the boatshed. Mr. Beale and Ms. Jones continue to gather any information you can about this cartel and the stolen weapons. Mr. Deeks I suggest you go to wardrobe and find yourself a suit for court." Hetty said.

Deeks just gave a nod and headed out of the Ops room.

"Are you sure this is a good idea Hetty? He's just getting back after being off for twelve weeks. He's been through enough." Kensi said.

"Deeks is strong he'll get through this." Callen said.

"You will all be there for him. If he starts to show signs of breaking down then take him out of this. I don't want to cause any more damage than what has already been done." Hetty said.

"We'll keep an eye on him." Sam said.

"A lot has happened to him growing up. So don't be surprised if his attitude changes or he's a little short with any of you. This won't be easy for him." Hetty said.

"We'll get him through this." Callen said

They went downstairs and waited for when Deeks would be ready to go. He was up in wardrobe getting ready for court. Kensi had to admit she was a little excited to see Deeks in court. She had always been curious to see how he acted and handled himself as a lawyer and now she was going to get to see him in action. After ten minutes Deeks walked down the stairs and over to the awaiting agents. Kensi whistled at Deeks in the very well fitted suit.

"You clean up nice partner." Kensi said with a smile.

"I hate these things."

Deeks said as he adjusted his suit jacket. It had been a long time since he had to go to court in a suit. There had been a few undercover operations where he had to be a lawyer and wear a suit all day. He hated it, but that was for doing something good, this was going to court to get his mother and step-father out of jail.

"Didn't you used to wear them all the time?" Callen asked trying to lighten the mood.

"And I hated every second of it. At least then it was for something good. I put criminals in jail, not get them out."

"This is doing something good. If they don't cooperate they go right back." Callen said.

"We better get this show on the road. We don't want to miss Deeks in court." Sam said with a smirk.

"I'll have you know I was a very good lawyer."

"That's because you're full of shit." Sam said with a smile as he headed out of the bullpen.

"It's because I'm intelligent thank-you." Deeks said who clearly took what Sam said the wrong way.

"That's not what I meant. I was only joking." Sam said.

"Sure you were." Deeks said with a slight attitude as he headed out of the building.

Callen placed a comforting hand on Sam's shoulder as they headed out into the parking lot and took off in two different cars. The drive down to the courthouse was done in silence in Kensi and Deeks' car. Kensi didn't know what to say and she knew that there was a lot more to this story then Deeks had told her about. The truth was all she really did know was that he shot his father when he was eleven and he was apparently abusive. She didn't know anything about his mother, or his step-father or even if he has any siblings. Kensi never realised just how much she doesn't know about her own partner. About a man that she had basically seen every day for the last three years. A man that she loved. She truly did know barely anything about his childhood or past. She had once said that his past didn't matter and she had meant that. She could still remember Monica giving him a hard time for having to lie to her while undercover. After the first time she had seen Deeks being Max Gentry she had done some of the research. Max Gentry was Deeks' legendary alias that had been responsible for a lot of take downs and even more information for other take downs. Max had been a 'bad boy' but because of him there were a lot of innocent lives saved. She knew Deeks hated being Max and she couldn't blame him. She truly didn't care about his past or the things he had done in it, because she knew the man he was today and he was a good man.

Sam and Callen were in Sam's charger and they were obviously talking about this case.

"Do you think Deeks is ready for this? He's only supposed to be on desk duty." Sam said.

"We'll keep a close eye on him. He's only going to court. I'm not going to let him into the field. He can't shoot a gun with his wrist in a brace. His other injuries are healed, but I don't want to push him he's still in pain."

"Mentally though, this can't be easy for him. We don't know anything about his childhood other than what Hetty told us. That phone conversation didn't sound very happy."

"All we know is that his father was abusive and he shot him in self defense. We don't know anything about his mother or his step-father. This will be a lot for him to handle. We'll keep a close eye on him Sam. I know you're worried about him ever since that day."

"Of course I'm worried about him. I completely misjudged him. He has so many problems with himself and yet I never noticed. I should have noticed that he was hiding behind a mask. I want to protect him in any way and keep him safe. I don't like this at all he should be back at Ops sitting at his desk where he is safe."

"What happened isn't your fault Sam. We all judged him at one point or another. Kensi trusts him with her life and more. That didn't happen over-night it took time. You two don't work together so that trust had to be built somehow. I trust him, because he's always had Kensi's back. For me that's good enough. We will keep him safe in the courthouse and then he will go right back to his desk."

"I know I just can't help, but think that this operation is a terrible idea. We have no idea what his mental state is right now. This could push him over the edge."

"We'll keep an eye on him Sam. If things get too intense we'll get him to leave. I'm not going to put him through any more stress then necessary. We need him to get his parents out of jail and then we can keep Deeks away from them. I'm not sure what happened between them, but my best guess is nothing good."

"From that phone conversation he didn't sound very happy. Though, that could be from whoever he was speaking to was in jail."

"I think there is a lot more to this story then we will be told. For now I think it's best to just keep Deeks away from them, especially Jason."

They pulled up to the courthouse and they parked next to Kensi's car. They got out and headed into the courthouse. Deeks made sure that his gun was kept in the car, not like he could use it even if he wanted to, and the other three had their badges out on display. They went into the main lobby and Deeks looked over at the board to see what courtroom they would be in.

"Deeks"

Deeks turned around to see Detective Walker walking over to him. Walker was a forty-six year old man with dark brown hair, clean shaven and green eyes. He was well built for his age, it was clear that he worked out on a regular bases. He was also wearing a well fitted brown suit and tie. Clearly Walker was not an undercover detective like Deeks.

"Hey Walker."

"You alright? You look a little banged up."

Deeks still had some bruising on his face and his torso. The bruising was very deep into his skin so it was taking longer to disappear and heal than normal bruising.

"Bad Op."

"Ya I gathered that from the brace and the bruising on your face. What happened to you? I didn't know you were on an L.A.P.D Op."

"It wasn't L.A.P.D it was for NCIS. I don't want to talk about it."

"Got it, no problem. We're in courtroom three."

Walker and Deeks walked over to Sam, Callen and Kensi that were just standing a little back while Deeks was speaking to Walker. They didn't know if Walker was the detective they were waiting for or if he was another lawyer.

"Guys this is Detective Walker. This is Agent Callen, Agent Sam Hannah and my partner Agent Kensi Blye. He's the one that has been chasing this cartel for a year now. I said we would do our best to include him."

"Absolutely. We're not looking to kick you off. You've been after these guys for a year we're not about to take that away from you." Sam said.

"I appreciate NCIS helping out on this case. The death pool has been increasing dramatically especially for the past three months. We have nothing to connect any of the crimes to them. No one will speak to us and they won't ever turn against the leader."

"Who is the leader?" Callen asked.

"That would be dependent upon who you ask. Some say it's a man named Jose Escobar. There are also people who claim that a man named Anthony Daniels is in charge of the cartel."

"You can't even get a confirmation on who is in charge?" Deeks asked.

"I told you I had nothing. Everyone is too terrified to talk about them. They're killing major cartels and adding their men to their cartel. No one will give these guys up. If we can just find a way into this cartel we might stand a chance."

"Who would you send in though?" Kensi asked.

"I have no idea. It would depend on the information we get out of Jason. Assuming we can even get him out on bail."

"I'm a prosecutor not a defense attorney you know that." Deeks said.

"I know, but you'll be able to do it."

"I'm gonna have to tear you apart."

"I figured as much. I was the arresting detective on the case. I won't take it personally. You guys ever see him in court?" Walker asked the three agents.

"Nope not yet." Callen said.

"We're looking forward to it." Sam said.

"He's good. The D.A was very happy when she found out that he would be working for them and not for the Defense office. He's never lost a case."

"Really?" Kensi asked.

"The day is not over yet Walker." Deeks said.

"Martin."

They turned to see two men in a brown and a black suit coming towards them. They saw Deeks stand up straighter and hid his emotions from his eyes and face.

"David." Deeks said.

"What are you doing back here?"

"I have a client."

"You're working in court today. Who's your client?"

"Mary and Jason."

"That's our case." The other man said.

"This is my intern. I'm the D.A for the case. The defendants are your parents if I remember correctly."

"My mother. He's not my father."

"I'm surprised Martin you were always a D.A. Now you're working to get the criminals out of jail."

"I'm working to get them out on bail not the charges dropped. The victim will have justice."

"Wait isn't he the man that the head D.A. is always talking about. You've never lost a case and you were the youngest D.A. that L.A has ever had. It's an honor to meet you sir."

"Don't talk to him he's the enemy right now. I won't go easy on you. They both need to be in jail for what they did to that woman."

"Save it for court councillor." Deeks said with a smirk.

The two men walked away from the group and headed towards the courtroom.

"You were the youngest D.A. How old were you when you graduated law school?" Kensi asked.

"I was in my twenties." Deeks vaguely answered.

"That doesn't really narrow it down." Kensi said.

"We need to get in there. The show is about to start." Detective Walker said.

"Who's first?"

"Your mother. Remember she was arrested for the assault, but she also had outstanding warrants for drug possession and prostitution."

"How old are the warrants?"

"The drug possession is five years and the prostitution is three years."

"How is that possible?"

"When they picked her up for prostitution she used a different name. It wasn't until after she was released did they find out her real name."

"Alright"

Deeks headed off towards courtroom three with Walker following behind him. The three agents looked at each other before they followed the two detectives. The three of them knew there was a lot more to Deeks' story then he was letting on. The problem was he didn't appear willing to share. Deeks sat over on the defendant side as they waited for their cases to come up. Deeks stood up once an old looking woman and man came into the room. The Agents knew that these were the ones they were waiting for. The woman, Mary, looked like a drug addict. They could see she had track marks on her arms from the back of the room. She had scraggly blonde hair that was un-brushed and matted. Her clothes were a tight tank top that showed off her cleavage and a tight pair of jeans that were low rise. She was easily in her fifties, but she looked much older. The man looked very mean. He had short salt and pepper hair, with tattoos on both arms. He had some muscles, but nothing compared to Sam's. He was tall and had some weight on him. Neither one looked loving or friendly. The three Agents were starting to understand the bigger picture behind Deeks' past.

Deeks went over to stand next to Mary as the Judge began.

"Mary Deeks you are being represented by Martin Deeks. You have been charged with aggravated assault as well as two counts of outstanding warrants. How do you plead?"

"My client pleads not guilty. If you will your honor I think we can resolve these issues very quickly today." Deeks said in a very serious and authoritative voice.

"Very well. The floor is yours councillor." The judge said.

"Your honor I would like to address the two outstanding warrants first. One was five years ago and the other was three years ago. Both are past the statute of limitation. My client cannot be held responsible for those warrants due to the time frame that the Federal law has stated."

"What were the warrants?" The judge asked.

"The first one was for drug possession five years ago and the second is for prostitution three years ago."

"Your honor Mrs. Deeks had drugs on her last night as well."

"My client was not arrested for drug possession she was arrested for aggravated assault. The L.A.P.D cannot add new charges, because their old one doesn't stick. It goes against my client's rights."

"The two outstanding warrants will be removed. I cannot hold someone accountable past the statute of limitations. Your client is still being held for aggravated assault. How does your client plead to that charge?" The Judge asked.

"My client pleads not guilty. In order for her to be charged with aggravated assault she would have had to assault someone. My client didn't do anything. She never laid a hand on the victim and L.A.P.D can't arrest people who just stand by and watch. Otherwise, there would be fifty other people being charged for this case. The only reason L.A.P.D charged my client is, because she refused to talk about the attack; along with many other customers at that bar last night. L.A.P.D had no right to charge my client with anything."

"Dose the D.A's office have any evidence against Mrs. Deeks?"

"Your honor she was there and we were told by eye witnesses that she had encouraged her husband assaulting the victim." The D.A answered back.

"It's he said she said. My client can't be held accountable based off of rumors and whispers of intoxicated people."

"Is that the only evidence you have against Mrs. Deeks?"

"Yes Maim." The D.A answered.

"Then I have no choice, but to drop the charges against Mrs. Deeks. This will be added into the court record. You are free to go Mrs. Deeks."

"Thank-you your honor." Deeks said.

Mary stood up and the court bailiff took her out of the room where she could be discharged.

"That's one. Jason will be the trick. Let's see if Deeks still has it." Walker whispered to Sam, Kensi and Callen.

"Next case is Mr. Jason Deeks. I am assuming you are also representing him Mr. Deeks?"

"Yes Maim." Deeks said.

Jason stood up and stood next to Deeks.

"Mr. Jason Deeks you are being charged with aggravated assault how do you plead?"

"Not guilty." Jason answered.

"Are you going for bail councillor?"

"We are." Deeks said.

"Proceed."

"The evidence that L.A.P.D has is circumstantial at best. There is no security cameras, no eye witness statements; the victim hasn't even identified her attacker. I move that my client is granted bail, due to the lack of evidence as well as the fact that he is not a flight risk. My client doesn't have the means or funds to leave the city let alone the state. He also has not been arrested in over ten years. I am not pushing to have this case thrown out, out of respect to the victim. However, that does not mean my client deserves to sit in jail while the L.A.P.D get their heads together."

"Your honor my client is in the hospital in the ICU from the beating that the defendant gave to her."

"The L.A.P.D has no physical proof of any of this. There's no DNA, no video, not even an eye witness. The victim has only been spoken to before she went into surgery. She was out of it with pain so any information they gathered from her is irrelevant; all of this is just speculation. I could have this case pushed to dismissal, but out of respect to the victim I am willing to give L.A.P.D the time to get their evidence. However, my client who is still innocent doesn't deserve to sit in jail. Not to mention the legal rights this is in violation of."

"Councillor, do you have any hard evidence you can provide for me right now that would give me cause to keep Mr. Jason Deeks in jail?" The judge asked.

"Not at this time your honor."

"Then I grant the bail and will see you all back here on the trial date." The judge said.

"Thank-you your honor." Deeks said.

Jason was dragged away just like Mary was into another room where they would wait for their discharge papers. Deeks walked out of the courtroom and Detective Walker and the three agents followed him out. They could tell that Deeks wasn't happy about having to get them out, especially his step-father, but he didn't have much choice. They were out in the lobby waiting for Mary and Jason to be discharged when David came up to them. Deeks barely had time to look at him when he was punched across his jaw. Pain immediately filled his jaw and head. His jaw wasn't fully healed yet and it was still causing him pain from the metal plates and his teeth. He could taste blood in his mouth. Kensi came over to him and placed her hand on his back. She knew that his mouth was still causing him a lot of pain and that punch was going to cause him a lot of pain.

"Deeks talk to me are you alright?"

Deeks didn't say anything he just made his way to the bathroom so he could spit out the blood and rinse his mouth out. Kensi went to follow, but Sam went instead. Callen and Walker were busy with David who had just hit Deeks for no reason.

"What the hell David?" Walker asked.

"He got that bastard out on bail when he should be in jail. He knows damn well that he assaulted that woman."

"He only got Jason out on bail, because we need him for a federal case. That's why Deeks got him out on bail. You just punched an injured man for no reason and until Deeks says otherwise you're under arrest." Callen said.

"This is ridiculous." David said.

"No what you did was ridiculous, because you lost in court. It's his first day back and you just punched him in the jaw, that twelve weeks ago was broken." Kensi said.

"I'm sorry alright I over reacted."

"We'll see how Deeks feels about it." Kensi said.

Sam walked into the bathroom to see Deeks spitting out blood into the sink. He turned the tap on so he could rinse out his mouth.

"That's a lot of blood. Are you alright?" The concern was clear in Sam's voice.

Deeks rinsed out his mouth and spit the tinted red water into the sink.

"Ya I'm fine. Jaw is just a little fragile right now."

"What's with all the blood?"

"It's from the pain killers. Main side effect is that they thin my blood and without my spleen, clotting can be a small issue."

"Is the doctor going to give you some medication to help with that?"

"He can once I don't need the pain killers. So until then I just can't get shot or stabbed."

"Well that shouldn't be hard considering you're on desk duty."

"Yup."

"Are you alright with this? You've never talked about your mother and step-father before. They don't look and sound like the best of people to be raised by."

"It doesn't matter what I want. We need to catch this cartel and Jason is the only way to do it. Just don't expect me to be doing the interviews."

"Callen and I will handle Jason. You don't even have to be inside the boatshed if you don't want."

Deeks turned off the water and used some paper towel to dry his hands and face off. He put his hands on the counter and had his head down. Sam could tell that he was thinking

"I know things between us are a little rocky right now. I judged you and I'll never make that mistake again. I trust you Deeks and more importantly I trust you with my family. If you ever want to talk I'm here to listen no matter what time of the day it is."

"I don't talk about it and if I did you would be the last person I go to. We should get back out there I'm sure David is trying not to pee his pants with Callen and Kensi right now."

"Kensi did not look happy when I left them. She's very protective of you." Sam said with sadness in his voice.

"That's because she doesn't want to break in a new partner." Deeks quietly joked.

They made their way out into the lobby and they could see Callen and Walker standing very close to David. Deeks walked up to Kensi and smirked at David.

"You good Deeks?" Callen asked.

"Ya I'm good just had to wash the blood out of my mouth."

"How much blood?" Kensi asked.

"I'm fine Kensi."

"What do you want us to do with idiot over here?" Walker asked.

"Did anyone explain to you what we're exactly doing here David?" Deeks asked.

"They explained. I'm sorry Martin I over reacted and I shouldn't have done that." David said.

"I suggest you get out of here, before one of them changes their minds." Deeks said.

"You don't want to press charges?" Walker asked.

"Too much paperwork." Deeks answered.

"I'm sorry Martin. If you need any help with this investigation just call me. I can help you get warrants if need be." David said.

"Thanks." Deeks said.

David walked away and the others waited around for when Mary and Jason finally came out of the holding room. Kensi put her hand on Deeks' arm and moved her mouth to his ear.

"Are you okay?"

Deeks turned his head so he was by Kensi's ear.

"I'm fine as long as he doesn't talk."

"He's not going to hit you is he?"

"I'm not too sure about that one."

Mary and Jason made their way towards them.

"Callen" Deeks said.

"Ya"

Deeks moved his head indicating for Callen to come over there and Sam followed.

"Just stand there." Deeks said to Callen.

"Is he going to do something?" Callen asked.

"He might. The last time I saw him was six years ago and he shot at me with a shotgun. Thankfully he was too drunk to aim."

"Oh lovely." Sam said sarcastically.

Mary came right over to Deeks with her arms open and a smile on her face. She hugged Deeks tight.

"Martin it's so good to see you. I knew you wouldn't let me down."

Deeks fought to get her arms off from him. He had no interest in getting hugged by his mother.

"Stop, get off me."

Deeks gently pushed her away from him and you could see her getting upset.

"I know I haven't been around recently, but that can change. What happened to you?"

Mary went to reach out and touch Deeks' face, but he moved back so she couldn't touch him.

"Hey don't treat your mother like that." Jason said with anger in his voice.

"It's fine honey. He has every right to be upset. I did call him from jail after all. Thank-you sweetie for getting us out. I owe you one."

"I wouldn't thank me just yet."

"Jason Deeks you are under arrest for affiliation to a drug cartel. You have the right to…" Callen said.

"What the hell is this about?" Jason cut Callen off.

Jason moved away from Callen who was about to cuff him and got right into Deeks' face. Sam wasn't even going to give Jason a chance to do anything. He grabbed his arm and put it behind Jason's back at an awkward angle making Jason groan.

"Do you want to add resisting arrest to your charges? I suggest you shut your mouth and do as you're told." Sam said as he cuffed Jason.

"What the hell is this? I don't know any drug cartels."

"We have pictures to prove otherwise." Walker said.

"Martin what is the meaning of this? How can you just stand there and let your father be arrested?"

"He's not my father."

"You shot your father so it's a good thing I'm not." Jason spat out.

"Keep talking and you'll see how it feels." Callen said.

"Let's go." Sam said

He dragged Jason with him as they made their way outside. They all followed outside and Mary was not going to give this up.

"Martin Andrew Deeks you explain yourself right now." Mary said.

"I don't have to explain anything to you." Deeks stopped so he could face his mother. Sam and Callen were getting Jason into the back of the charger, but they could hear the conversation.

"Don't you dare talk to me like that! I am your mother you will show me respect!" Mary yelled.

"You want respect then get sober. Stop getting arrested for doing drugs and selling yourself out to the highest bidder. Be a damn mother for once in your life. No one can respect a heroin addicted hooker. Now shut the hell up or you'll be in the car with him."

Deeks walked away and towards the car. Everyone could tell that Deeks was pissed off and they knew that they had to keep an eye on him before this got out of hand. There was clearly a lot of hurt feelings and anger on Deeks' end still and they had a feeling they were about to get a glimpse why that was. Kensi turned her attention to Walker who was still standing there by her.

"Why don't I take her in my car and follow you guys." Walker suggested.

"I think that would be a good idea." Kensi said.

"Come on Mrs. Deeks we'll go in my car and give Deeks some time to calm down." Walker said politely.

Mary followed him to his car and got into the passenger seat. The other agents got into their own cars and headed out for the boatshed.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

They pulled into the boatshed and Kensi parked the car. The whole way there the car was silent once again. Kensi didn't know what to say to Deeks. He clearly was upset and angered by his mother and step-father. Kensi couldn't blame him though, from how they acted in the court house Kensi knew that growing up they wouldn't have been easy. Kensi knew that Deeks didn't have the best childhood, but she had a feeling she was about to find out just how bad it was. Kensi always thought she had a horrible childhood, her father was killed in the line of duty and she spent a few months here and there on the streets, but that was her own doing. She could have gone back to her mother, but she was stubborn and refused to go back to her. Kensi was the one to make her life hard and she knew that. Deeks was different though, Deeks didn't make his life hard; his parents did. The two people that are supposed to help you and protect you were the ones that Deeks had to fear. It wasn't supposed to be like that. A child wasn't supposed to have to fear their own parents.

Deeks got out of the car and went over to the wall separating the land from the water. Deeks always found water to be calming for him. It was part of the reason why he loved to surf so much. Kensi got out of her car just as the other two cars pulled up. Kensi went over to Deeks; she knew the others would go inside and give them some time alone. Kensi went and stood next to Deeks, but didn't say anything right away. She stood there and watched as Sam dragged Jason inside the boatshed as Callen and Walker took Mary inside. Walker had two file boxes and Kensi knew that was all the gathered information on this cartel. Callen looked over at Kensi and Kensi gave a nod letting him know that she would be in, in a minute. Once they were alone outside Kensi decided she would speak.

"Deeks, I know this isn't easy for you. Are you going to stay out here?" Kensi asked softly.

"I'm sure you guys will get any information out of him. I'm not really in the mood to listen to his bullshit."

"Okay I'll come back out when we are done. Deeks you know anything that happens in there it's not going to change anything. I don't care about your past. I care about who you are now."

Deeks looked at Kensi as he spoke.

"See if you can still say that after the interviews."

"I know I will. You are a good man Deeks. Nothing they say will ever change that. I know you. I know you are a good man and that is all that matters." Kensi said looking right at Deeks.

"Be careful in there with him. If you are going in there alone keep him cuffed to the table."

"I'll be fine Deeks."

"Kensi I mean it. Keep him cuffed to the table." Deeks said in a serious voice.

"Ok I will. Though, I'm pretty sure Sam wants Jason. He seemed pretty angry with him."

"That's because Jason goes against Sam's seal ways."

"Everything will be fine. We will get Jason to talk then we will go back to Ops and figure this out. I should get in there so we can get started."

"Be safe."

"I'm always safe. I'll come get you when we are done."

Kensi left Deeks there leaning against the wall facing the water. Deeks didn't like Kensi being in there with his mother and step-father. He really didn't want her to know about his past, because it wasn't good. He had done some things growing-up with Ray that he wasn't happy about or proud of. He was different when he was younger, he was angry after having to shoot his own father to keep himself from being killed. He was at peace with it now on some level and he was more level headed. He still didn't want Kensi, the woman he loved, to know about his past at least not this way. Everything between them was different and confusing. After that kiss they just both tried to pretend like it never happened. The problem was Deeks didn't want to pretend like it didn't happen. He was glad that it happened and he wanted to be with Kensi. He just didn't know if she would want to be with him after this.

Kensi entered the boatshed to see that Jason was in the interrogation room and Mary was sitting down on the couch. Sam, Callen and Walker were staring at the video screen. Jason was sitting down and looking like he didn't have a care in the world. This was nothing to him. What he did to that woman was nothing to him. He truly didn't care at all that he was arrested by federal agents or that he almost beat a woman to death less than twenty-four hours ago.

"Where do you want to go from here?" Walker asked.

"Is this all you have on the cartel?" Callen asked pointing to the two file boxes on the table.

"That's all. In one year that is all we have been able to get on them. These guys are good and they make sure everyone is too afraid to talk." Walker said.

"So how do we want to do this?" Kensi asked.

"I'll go first." Sam said with a smirk on his face.

"Try not to hurt him too much." Callen said.

"This is fucking stupid! My husband didn't do anything." Mary said as she stood up from the couch. "Where is that no good son of mine? He's going to fix this shit."

Mary went towards the door and Kensi went over to stop her. Kensi grabbed Mary's arm and dragged her back to the couch as she spoke.

"You are going to sit her and not say a single word. Deeks is busy and when he is free he'll come in. So until I say otherwise sit your ass down and don't speak or you'll be the one arrested next got it?" Kensi said with anger in her voice.

All Mary did was give Kensi a dirty look and Kensi walked away. Kensi didn't know what happened growing up, but she did know if Mary was any kind of mother she would have shot Deeks' father and not leaving it to an eleven year old. Kensi went back over to the others at the table.

"I don't see him being easily intimidated." Kensi said.

"Not this animal. He almost beat a woman to death and he's sitting there like he's waiting for a bus. Jason is stone cold. He doesn't have remorse or regrets. He's already been to prison before for years and inmates were afraid of him. He won't have any fear of going back." Walker said.

"What kind of record?" Callen asked.

"Drug related charges, running a prostitution ring, child abuse and domestic abuse. Jason and Mary met when Deeks was eleven, only three months after his father was shot. Mary was a prostitute and Jason became her pimp. Not even a month after Deeks' real father, Gordon, went to jail she was married to Jason and had him adopt Deeks. Deeks lived in that house for two years with prostitutes and Johns coming in and out all day and night; drugs and dealers there at all hours. Plus Jason was abusive towards Mary and himself. When Deeks was fourteen they kicked him out and he lived on the street until he was eighteen and went to College." Walker whispered so Mary wouldn't know what they were talking about.

"Parents of the year." Sam said sarcastically.

"That's where Deeks' legendary alias, Max Gentry, came from. When Deeks was fourteen and forced to live on the streets he needed to be someone tough. Someone that people wouldn't mess with so he created Max. It stuck with him his whole life. When he went into the L.A.P.D they used that as a way to get information on drug dealers, arm traffickers and human traffickers. Max had a long list of informants. Deeks hates Max though, he hates being him and everything about him. At the time it was just a means to stay alive and survive. He never thought he would have to go back to being that person. Deeks had to do a lot of bad things as Max even when he was fourteen to survive." Walker explained.

"Deeks was homeless?" Kensi couldn't believe that Deeks didn't tell her. He knew about her being homeless and living on the streets here and there for months at a time. Yet he didn't feel the need to tell her that he was also homeless growing up for four years.

"He never told us." Callen said.

"Don't think too much of it. There are only a handful of people that know Deeks' whole story. He doesn't like to talk about it. I only know, because my partner knew Deeks from growing up. There are still a few older officers that refuse to retire that know about Deeks' childhood, because they were there for part of it." Walker said.

"I think our best shot with this guy is to try and get a bottom fish out of him. Maybe you can have an undercover work their way up. It could take a while, but at least you'll have someone on the inside." Sam said getting everyone back on track.

The more he learned about Deeks' past the angrier he was getting. He needed to be able to keep his cool when he goes in to speak to Jason. He didn't want to go in there just wanting to beat the living hell out of him.

"It would take longer, but that might be our only choice. Like I said we don't even have complete confirmation of who is even in charge of this cartel."

"Sam, go in and see what you can get out of Jason. If we don't get anywhere maybe Mary knows something." Callen said.

Sam headed into the interrogation room. Sam was angry at Jason for trying to hit Deeks. Deeks was still hurt from being torture and the last thing he needed was to be punched in the face. Deeks' jaw was still giving him some trouble after being drilled through he didn't need any more pain to go with it. Sam also didn't know what happened to Deeks growing up, but he knew that Jason was part of the nightmares that Deeks had going through his mind. Sam couldn't imagine kicking one of his daughters out onto the street at any age, let alone just fourteen to fend for themselves. Deeks' life was a lot harder than Sam had ever thought; which just made what Sam used to think of Deeks even worse. Sam never gave Deeks a chance even when he proved he could be a good agent Sam still belittled him and road his ass all day long. Sam was a seal and he was different than Deeks, but he never realised just how deep Deeks truly is. There were a lot of demons in Deeks' past that Sam never even considered. Sam judged him and he continued to judge him, because of how he acted and because of his title. Sam knew he had to make it right; the problem was Deeks didn't really want to talk to him. Even during the twelve weeks that Deeks was healing from everything he still refused to talk to Sam for more than five minutes. Sam knew that Deeks was pissed off at him and it would take a long time before they could ever repair what was done to their relationship.

Sam entered the room to see Jason still sitting down like he didn't have a care in the world. Sam figured he would go in as a bad cop. Jason was hard and he had already been through prison before so Sam using that as a threat wouldn't work. Sam didn't sit down he just stood on his side of the table and looked at Jason. This was a tough man, he was cold hearted and he almost beat a woman to death for just the hell of it. Sam couldn't imagine what he had done to Deeks while Deeks lived with him and his mother.

"Did that worthless piece of shit son of mine put you all up to this?" Jason asked with nothing, but hatred in his voice.

"He's not your son and he's not worthless or a piece of shit. That would be you."

"He is my son. I adopted him when he was twelve. I just made sure I kept any guns away from him."

"For two years then you kicked him out. Threw him out on the streets like he was nothing." Sam said with disgust.

"Hey I gave that bitch a choice me or him. She picked me. She was the one to throw him out with the trash. I wasn't about to complain. Why the hell am I here?"

"What do you know about Los ángeles de Satanás?"

"What the fuck is that a new dance?"

"It's a cartel, translated to Satan's Devils. We have pictures of you with some of their runners."

"I don't know any cartels or any runners. I'm an upstanding member of society." Jason said with a smirk.

"Ya real upstanding member you almost beat a woman to death last night. The only reason you aren't in jai right now is, because we know you have information on them. You don't want to talk then you go right back to jail with a whole new list of charges."

"Oooo scary. You want information you're gonna have to make it real interesting for me. I'm use to prison it's not an issue."

"No you're not used to prison, where I'm going to send you isn't going to be anything like the last one. You went to a nice comfy prison last time. This time you don't cooperate then I am going to send you to the worst prison in the United States. Let's see how much you enjoy being in a prison full of serial killers, terrorists and the criminally insane. You'll be someone's bitch by the end of the day."

"Prisons don't scare me." Jason said with more force. "So try again. You want the information make it worth my wild. Bring that fine piece of ass in here and maybe I'll talk to her. I could use an upgrade from my whore of a wife."

"You need to learn how to speak to woman with respect. You don't get to speak to her. You get me, so start talking before I lose my patience."

"You don't scare me. Why don't you go ask my worthless son how I can be? I've done things worse than you ever have or will. You can't threaten me. I want to speak to her and only her. Or is she too afraid to come and have a chat?"

Sam didn't say anything he just left the room. He knew that Jason wasn't going to budge. He had been doing this long enough to know when someone was willing to talk and when someone wasn't. Jason would only speak with Kensi and Sam didn't know how he felt about that. Sam didn't want Kensi in the same room as Jason. There truly was no telling just how he would act with her. Sam walked back to everyone in the room and Sam could tell that they were all upset with what Jason had to say about Deeks. Sam walked over to the table.

"Well that didn't work." Sam said.

"So I'll talk to him." Kensi said.

"Are you sure Kens?" Callen asked.

"I don't think it's a good idea. He just wants to play around." Sam said.

"I'll be fine. If he's going to talk to me then fine. I can handle myself." Kensi said.

"I don't like it. He's too cold and heartless. He just wants to play." Sam said.

"We don't have much of a choice. It's either she goes in or Deeks has to go in. We need the information and it's looking like he's only going to talk to one of them. I really don't recommend sending in Deeks." Walker said.

"Deeks isn't going in there." Callen said.

"I'll go in. I'll get him to talk. We need the information if he's willing to talk to me then I'll do it." Kensi said.

"Go." Callen said.

Kensi grabbed the cuffs that were on the table from when Jason was arrested. She headed into the room.

"I don't like this G." Sam said.

"I know, but we can't have Deeks in there. He can't even handle being in here to hear this. If Kensi can get the information out of him then we should let her." Callen answered.

Kensi walked into the room and went right over to Jason.

"Well, well, well they did send you in. I thought I would be in here all alone." Jason said with a smirk.

Kensi went over to him and slapped the cuffs onto him and around the table leg so he couldn't move his hands. She then stood where Sam was with her arms across her chest.

"What's wrong sweetheart scared of little old me?"

"No I promised Deeks I would cuff you if I came in here with you." Kensi said with a controlled voice.

"Ah I see my worthless son has told you some things about me."

"Nope he never mentions you. That's how little of an impression you left on him."

"Oh I left an impression on him. Twenty scars, bloody noses, over a hundred bruises, welts and lashes on his back. Tell me have you seen him without a shirt?"

"No." Kensi said with seriousness to her voice.

Kensi truly hadn't seen Deeks without a shirt on. Even though she had spent a few nights at Deeks' apartment after what happened, she never saw him without a shirt on. Deeks wasn't comfortable with the scars left from his torture and Kensi could understand that. He was a little self-conscious with his body after what happened and Kensi understood that perfectly well. Deeks had been through a lot and he was still healing from it all. Kensi couldn't help, but be worried about Deeks. He didn't need any more stress right now. Kensi didn't even like that he was back to work, on desk duty or not. She felt that Deeks needed more time to get over what happened. He needed more time to deal with everything.

"That's a shame you haven't seen my work. And here I thought you were fucking my son. Or maybe he doesn't remove his shirt while you're doing it."

"He's my partner. Now unless you actually have something useful to tell me I'm leaving and you are going back to prison."

"Fine, I just figured you would want to know more about him. I'm surprised they gave him a gun. I'd be a little worried about who he is aiming at. Anyone that shoots their own father really shouldn't be trusted with a gun."

"His father tried to kill him. He made the choice to live and not be killed. Anyone would make that same choice. Now talk or I'm leaving." Kensi said with force.

"I may know a few runners within the Satan's Angels cartel. They won't help you though; they won't talk to any cops."

"Who are they?"

"They're runners; they run drugs for the cartel." Jason said in a smart ass tone.

"Their names." Kensi said with an, I'm not messing around voice.

"Booger A.K.A Nathan Walter, Sticky A.K.A Chris Dawson and Scar A.K.A Daniel Phillip."

"How often do you see them?"

"Depends on if they are in the neighborhood or not. When one of my whores needs a fix I call them. They have everything and always gave me a good price and quality. On slow nights we'll go for drinks and they talk about work."

"What do they say?"

"Just how dangerous their boss is. How he killed their old boss and now they have to work for him. How they are making more money with him than before. Shit like that."

"When was the last time you saw them?"

"About a week ago I needed a refill on my order."

"What did they say?"

"Not much just that they were looking to add on to the family. Asked if I was interested. I told them I was too busy running my own business."

"Is that all?"

"They're drug runners for one of the largest cartels that L.A has now. They don't exactly share too much information sweetie. That's all I know."

Kensi didn't say anything she just left the room and headed back out to the table. Mary was up and wandering around, clearly her heroin was wearing off.

"When can I see my husband?" Mary asked slightly too loud.

"Why don't you ask about your son?" Kensi snapped.

She couldn't take it anymore. They were both calling him worthless and acting like he was nothing more than a piece of trash they had to throw away. She hated anyone treating Deeks like shit and these two seemed to be the worst.

"Why the hell should I? He's nothing, but a piece of shit. He'll never be good enough. He's constantly screwing up. He's always been a trouble maker and a mistake. It's because of him that I lost my husband. I lost my soul mate, because of him."

"You're soul mate tried to kill him." Sam said with disgust in his voice.

"He deserved it. He deserved every hit he got. He was a screw up. It just got worse after he shot him. He was sneaking out at night, he wouldn't help me count and weigh the drugs, he wouldn't help me deliver them, yet he could go steal a car with that bastard Ray. He had time to get into fights and get arrested, but he didn't have time to help me. I don't regret anything that happened to him. He deserved everything he got. He was a horrible son and if I failed at one thing it was not letting either of my husbands beat him enough. Maybe then he would have turned out right."

Kensi went to go over to Mary, but Callen grabbed Kensi's arm knowing that she might lose it. Callen was on the edge of losing it and he was always able to stay calm. The problem was recently Deeks was having a really hard time and he didn't need this to go with it.

"Sam put her in the room with Jason so we can work." Callen said.

Callen knew that Sam was upset and pissed off, but he also knew that Sam wouldn't hurt a woman regardless of how much he wanted to. Sam went over to Mary and grabbed her by the arm and brought her into the interrogation room with Jason. He didn't even say anything he just put Mary in the room and then left locking the door behind him.

"Kensi calm down." Callen said.

"They don't even care. They don't care about what they did to him. They don't care how he is now. They just don't care. Deeks was completely on his own his whole life. No wonder he doesn't know what family is and what a team is. He's never been on one or had one." Kensi said with anger in her voice.

"He does now." Callen let out a sigh. He just couldn't believe how bad Deeks' parents were towards him. "That's all the information we are going to get out of Jason. He doesn't know much, but at least we got three names now." Callen said.

"I told you he was more trouble than he was worth." Jason's voice broke out over their conversation. They all turned to the screen.

"Well it's not my fault he never died. God knows Gord tried. Five years old Gord ties him up outside to a tree in a huge thunderstorm. There's lightening and torrential rain. It went on for three days and he still didn't die. He just got sick and that was even worse than before. He kept asking for a hug pathetic child." Mary said with nothing, but anger in her voice.

"You should have let me shoot him when he was twelve it would have solved our problems."

"And then the cops show up and you go to jail like my last husband, because of him. You only had to deal with him for two years I had fourteen. He used to cry all day long as a baby. He would never shut up. Damn home nurse said it was from the heroin, apparently he was addicted. I couldn't even get rid of him when I was pregnant."

"Well you certainly enjoyed him when he was fourteen and I found you naked on top of him." Jason said with disgust.

"Well if you hadn't been so drunk and high all the time I wouldn't have to of turned to him. You and Gord were just a like. Too drunk to get it up. Seemed like the perfect way to satisfy my needs when he was eight. Just had to handcuff him to the bed and made sure he kept his mouth shut. Gord was always good at keeping him afraid to speak. Besides I chose you and kicked his ass out. What more do you want?"

"I wanted to know that my wife had been fucking her son since he was eight. I could have made money off from that."

"Well you should have said something back then."

Sam reached over and turned the mics off.

"I can't hear any more or I'm going to go in there and shot them both in the head." Sam said with nothing, but hatred in his voice.

"His own mother was molesting him?" Kensi said with disbelief and hurt in her voice.

"Ya it's probably best you never mention that to Deeks." Walker said.

"You knew?" Callen asked with anger in his voice.

"Deeks has never admitted to it or denied it. My training officer was called out for an abuse case once. It was Deeks and he was ten at the time. The doctor at the hospital didn't believe his story of being beat up by a gang. He suspected that Deeks was being abused and he thought he was sexually assaulted. Deeks never talked about it and there wasn't any evidence of it. My training officer knew that it was true, but Deeks was so afraid to talk, especially to cops that he couldn't ever charge Gordon or Mary with abuse. Deeks would never talk and CPS never did anything about it, because of the area he lived in. too many kids being abused and none of them talking. They could never get into the house or even talk to Deeks. Deeks doesn't talk about growing up and he won't ever talk about that so don't mention it. All it will do is upset him." Walker explained.

"How does someone like Deeks turn out the way that he did with parents like that? He didn't just have one bad parent he had three." Kensi said.

"Deeks raised himself and he did a good job of it. Deeks has been through a lot and I'm not going to tell you his story. You want to know it; then ask him, but don't expect him to tell you much." Walker said.

"We do have three names now that we can look into." Callen said hoping to get this conversation back on track. He felt that it was wrong for them to be talking about Deeks behind his back. This was Deeks personal childhood and Callen wouldn't want someone talking about his behind his back.

"We have a way in now to." Walker said.

"How?" Kensi asked.

"There is an existing alias that is friends with Scar. They need some new help then I can give them that and with Scar already working there. This alias will be perfect." Walker said.

"Who is the undercover?" Callen asked.

"That will be the problem." Walker said.

"Why?" Sam asked.

"Because the undercover might not be in the condition to go in. He also hates the alias." Walker answered.

"He might not have a choice. If he's the best person for the job he's going to have to go in." Sam said.

"Who is the undercover?" Callen asked.

"Deeks." Walker said.

"No way." Kensi said immediately.

"Max Gentry and Scar go way back. Same with Ray they all knew each other. Scar only knew Deeks as Max never anything different. Max also has the perfect backstory and history for something like this." Walker said.

"It's not happening." Kensi said.

"You did say this person wouldn't have a choice in going in." Walker said.

"Deeks isn't going undercover. He's not even cleared for field duty." Sam said.

"Why isn't he cleared for duty?" Walker asked.

"His wrist is in a brace he can't fire a gun." Callen said.

"He's fired a gun before in a cast; he can do it in a brace. So what's the other reason you don't want to tell me?" Walker asked.

"It's classified. Deeks isn't going in." Callen said.

"He's L.A.P.D so he doesn't take orders from you. It's his decision and my Lieutenant will think the same thing. We have a chance to take this cartel down finally. The death toll is over two thousand, not to mention the millions of dollars of drugs being sold and weapons being sold. So unless Deeks has a really good reason not to go in then I don't see the point in this discussion." Walker said.

"We can also choose to kick L.A.P.D out of our investigation. This involves military weapons which makes this our jurisdiction not L.A.P.D. Deeks isn't going in. He can't go in he's not ready." Callen said.

"Ready after what? He's been on bad Ops before and has never had a problem coming back to work and going on another one. So what happened on this Op that made it so he can't go back to field work?" Walker asked with more authority in his voice.

Walker had known Deeks since he came into the L.A.P.D and he had every right to know why Deeks couldn't be active in the field. He has seen Deeks going through a lot over the years and never had he not returned to active duty.

"You know you can hear you arguing outside. I can't actually hear what you are arguing about, but your voices are loud. When Kensi starts to get loud then something can't be good." Deeks said from the doorway.

They didn't even hear Deeks come into the boatshed, but thankfully he didn't hear what they were saying. Deeks looked around and could tell that his mother wasn't in the room so he went over to the table with the others. He turned to see his mother and step-father arguing in the interrogation room.

"Did you get anything out of him?" Deeks asked.

"How are you feeling?" Walker asked.

"You know me."

"I know you well enough to know that no one really knows you." Walker said back.

"Touché." Deeks said as he looked at the screen again.

"What happened to you on this Op Deeks?" Walker asked.

Deeks looked over at Walker as he spoke. "Why does that matter?"

"It doesn't." Kensi said with anger in her voice.

"I just need to know where your head is at. They said you can't be in the field, because of the brace, but I've known you to be in the field with a cast and still shoot a gun. That means there's something going on with your head." Walker said.

"My head is fine. Ya I've shot a gun with a cast before and I broke my wrist more. I just got the dam cast off I'm not looking to break it again. You're asking me about my head and this last Op. Kensi is pissed and no one will answer my question about what you found out. So how about someone tells me what the hell is going on before I get mad." Deeks said.

"Jason gave us three names of the runners. He also said that they were looking to add to the family." Callen said.

"So who are the runners?" Deeks asked.

"Street names are Booger, Sticky and Scar. Also known as Nathan Walter, Chris Dawson and Daniel Phillip." Walker said.

"And there it is why Kensi is pissed." Deeks said.

"Deeks" Walker started.

"I'm not going under especially as him." Deeks said with force.

"You're dam right you are not going under." Kensi said with even more force as she looked right at Deeks.

"What is she your wife?" Walker asked Deeks.

"She's my partner. She's a little possessive." Deeks said trying to lighten the mood, but it wasn't working.

Thankfully Eric and Nell popped up on the video screen to take the attention off from Deeks for a little bit.

"What do you got?" Sam asked.

"Well this cartel has been very busy in the last year. The death toll so far is over two thousand. You already know about them selling drugs and military weapons, but they aren't just selling the weapons overseas. They have been selling them to local gangs that they are in an alliance with as well." Eric said.

"They also may be involved with human trafficking. They take young girls and boys from Mexico and sell them all over the States. From what we have been able to find they are working almost as if they are a company. They are branching out jobs to other local gangs to do. That's how they have been able to keep their hands clean for so long. They physically haven't done the work. Whoever is in charge of this cartel is smart enough to know how to remain unseen. We can't even find out who is in charge." Nell said.

"He's intelligent, which means he might not have a record. He could just be a business man." Deeks said.

"What just a normal everyday business man?" Walker said.

"Think about it. How many gangs or cartel members have you seen that don't brag about what they have done? How many don't have a record? How many actually have the IQ to keep his own identity a secret? I'm willing to bet that even if you do find a name on him it will be fake and someone else is acting like he's in charge and taking orders from this man. He's operating like it's a business which means he's gone to school for business and probably has others that are legal to supplement his income. He's contracting other gangs to do the dirty work and rewarding them with money, drugs and guns. It's the perfect business transaction. He's killing off the competition and building his employees at the same time. A normal cartel will stick to selling drugs and they might sell small guns here and there. They never branch off to that many different levels. This cartel is running a drug ring, stealing military weapons and selling them everywhere, killing off the other cartels and now human trafficking. Cartel leaders are lazy they don't want to work that many angles, because it's a lot of work and takes a lot of intelligence that cartels don't have." Deeks explained.

"Makes sense. Could be how he has been able to keep people away from him. No one not even the cartel members know his name. Police wouldn't be looking for a business man; they would be too busy trying to find the one with the biggest record. It's a smart move." Sam said.

"Did you find anything about the military weapons?" Kensi asked.

"We were able to trace some back to different bases all over California. They were able to get in without alerting security or any alarms." Nell said.

"So they have someone on the inside to these bases." Walker said.

"Or just a military contact. If you can get into one base you will know how to get into them all. If they have a military contact then they have all the information they need. Including what base has what weapons." Sam said.

"There is one other thing we found. We have been running a trace on all the stolen weapons to see if we can locate them. Some of the higher weapons actually have a microchip in them so they can be GPS. Some we can find if the serial number wasn't scratched off and they were arrested with the weapon. A lot of them are in L.A." Eric said.

"We also found some communications done online between different gang leaders. Guys they are claiming war against L.A.P.D and its set to start today." Nell said.

"Something big is going to happen." Deeks said.

"Ya it's called ten thousand gang members going after L.A.P.D" Walker said.

"No seriously think about it. Say you want to rob a bank completely empty, safe, safety deposit boxes everything. It's going to take a skilled team at least thirty minutes, but the longer you are in there the more cops are going to show. You risk tripping silent alarms, someone calling the police; anything could happen whether it's day or night. So what do you do? You create a distraction something to keep the cops busy so you can get in and get out." Deeks explained.

"The cartel is planning something big." Callen said understanding where Deeks was going.

"When someone declares war against one precinct it's that precinct's problem. Declare war against all of L.A.P.D all of a sudden you have a mass hysteria among all of the precincts. Unless you are in deep cover you get called back. Everyone gets called in doesn't matter what ranking you are or what department you are in. You get called back. You could literally be hours away from making a major drug bust and it gets put on the back burner. It doesn't matter what case you are on it becomes second best. The number of false calls will go up drastically and you don't know if when you get there it will be an ambush or not. So each call at least two cruisers has to go making four cops busy with just one call. The longer this goes on for the more likely that cops will transfer to a different city, cops will be injured and killed and cops will be afraid to go on calls putting innocent people at risk. Everything goes to the extreme and cops are too busy just trying to survive each hour that if a cartel wants to steal something really good they'll be able to." Deeks explained.

"Even people who are on medical leave; if they are healthy enough they get called in. Chief of Police takes control of all precincts and will put together a special tactical squad to hunt down the gang leaders and bringing them in." Walker said.

"It also means that we both get called in if this happens." Deeks said.

"You can't go. Deeks you're not cleared for field duty." Kensi said.

"It won't matter. Everyone gets brought in regardless. If you can move and shot you get brought in." Deeks said.

"So if they are planning a heist then it's something big. I can't see robbing a bank they would have enough money from the drugs and weapon sales." Callen said.

"Which means some base is going to get hit; or an armory maybe." Sam said.

"Eric, make sure all bases are on alert for any break-ins." Callen said.

"On it." Eric said.

The screen went back to the interrogation room with Jason and Mary in it still arguing.

"This is bad. If they strike the whole city is going to go nuts." Deeks said.

"Bases in California have a variety of weapons, from guns to rockets big enough to take out a small city." Sam said.

"But if they were going to go after a base then why the war with L.A.P.D? It has to be something in the city and it has to be big enough for them to need a distraction this big." Kensi said.

"So what do we have in L.A that would be big enough for the cartel? Banks, but like you said they don't need the money. So what kind of weapons do we have in the city?" Walker asked.

"Armories, but it's just guns." Kensi said.

"We're missing something and whatever that is; it's what they are going to go after." Callen said.

The screen changed again and it was Eric and Nell once more.

"Guy we have a problem. This just came on the news." Eric said.

The screen split so Eric and Nell were in a small box in the top right hand corner. On the rest of the screen was breaking news from a helicopter. There was a gun fight out front of a precinct. There was a gang out front taking cover while they shot at the building. The building had smoke coming out of it and the front door was destroyed by what looked like some kind of explosion.

"As you can see there is multiple gang members out front of precinct twenty-nine. We don't know much, but the building does appear to be on fire and officers and prisoners are trapped inside. The gang members have yet to stop fire on the building. Officers have been shot down out front as they tried to make it out to safety. So far there have been no back-up to help the officers trapped inside." The news reporter said.

"That's our precinct." Walker said.

Deeks had his cell phone out and called 9-1-1.

"Who are you calling?" Walker asked.

"9-1-1. We need to go. You got weapons in that car?" Deeks asked.

"I have riffles. I was bringing them back to the station."

"9-1-1 what's your emergency?" The operator asked.

"This is Detective Marty Deeks with the L.A.P.D. Badge number 9546. I need all available units to get to precinct twenty-nine. They are under attack by a local gang. Have ambulance and fire stand by a few blocks away. We need a tactical squad down there as fast as possible. Officers are trapped inside and the building is one fire." Deeks said as they made their way out the door.

"I'll have everyone sent over there right away Detective." The operator said.

Deeks hung up the phone and Kensi, Callen and Sam followed behind them outside.

"Deeks you can't go. Your wrist is in a brace you can't shoot." Kensi said.

"I don't have a choice. I'm not just going to leave them. Give me your keys you suck at driving." Deeks said to Walker.

Walker threw his keys to Deeks and Deeks went to get into the driver seat. Callen pulled out his cell phone to call Eric.

"Callen what do you need?" Eric asked knowing that Callen wanted something.

"Get a tactical squad together and send them over to the precinct. We're going with Deeks and Walker." Callen said as he went over to Sam's charger.

Kensi ran to her car and got in while Callen and Sam got into Sam's charger. They drove off after Deeks and Walker. They actually had to fight to keep up with Deeks. They had no idea that he could drive like this. Usually it was Kensi that drove so they really hadn't seen Deeks drive too much. He could definitely drive; Sam was having a hard time keeping up with him. They stopped half a block away from the precinct and Deeks and Walker got out. They went to the trunk of the car so they could grab the weapons. Callen, Sam and Kensi came up to them.

"What's the plan?" Callen asked.

"We don't have much and we don't have vests. Just up the street is the back of the station. If we can get into the station we can get more supplies and vests. Other officers will be here soon to cover the front." Deeks said.

Walker handed Deeks a raffle and he took one for himself. Kensi handed Deeks his hand gun and he put it in the back of his pants.

"Let's go." Deeks said.

They ran the rest of the way to the precinct. Around the back there were a few gang members there as well to shoot anyone that came out. They took cover and took out the few gang members outside and carefully made their way inside. Once they were inside they couldn't believe it. The place was covered with smoke and ash from the explosion. Thankfully it didn't take the building down. The power was out so it was only the emergency lighting. They were still taking heavy fire and they had to keep cover as they moved throughout the station. As they passed someone that was unconscious they checked for a pulse. So far they hadn't come across anyone dead, just injured. Deeks made his way out towards the armory of the station and he found Bates trying to help out. Deeks crouched by Bates so he could talk to him with the others right around him.

"Deeks when the hell did you get here?" Bates asked.

"We saw it on the news. I called it in, soon half the city should be out front with a tactical squad."

"Get some vests and take some men and go out front to help get them away from the front doors. The armory is fine, go there and get ready then take a team out front."

"You have a lot injured down the hallway, but none dead so far." Deeks said as he started to move on towards the armory.

"Deeks you're in charge of the team take whoever you find." Bates said.

Deeks made his way towards the armory with Walker, Callen, Sam and Kensi behind him. Deeks grabbed officers and detectives as he made his way there and by the time they reached the armory there were twenty of them.

"Grab a vest and put it under your shirt. If they see a vest they will automatically shoot you in the head. If they don't see a vest they will shoot you in the chest. So put it under your shirt. Grab ammo and a riffle if you can shoot one. We are going out front to help draw their fire and help the back-up when it arrives. Hide behind anything you can and make smart shots. Look around and get a good picture of everyone in this room so you don't shot the wrong person. This is Agent Hannah, Blye and Callen; they are with NCIS and have more training than you do. So if they tell you to do something do it. Let's gear up and get out there." Deeks said.

They all grabbed vests including Callen, Sam and Kensi. They had never seen Deeks in charge before and they had to admit they were surprised that he was this good at it. The officers and other detectives were listening to him and following his orders. That surprised them, because they knew that his station didn't like him. They grabbed some of the riffles and lots of ammo. Deeks took the lead and led everyone out back so they could go around the building.

"Alright half of you are coming with me. We are going around to the right. The other half of you go with Agent Callen and go around the left so we can hit them from both sides. Those of you going with Agent Callen you follow his orders." Deeks said.

"My team let's go." Callen said.

Sam went with Callen and half of the officers while Kensi and Walker went with Deeks and the rest of the officers. They went around the right side while Callen's team went around the left side. Deeks knew they needed to pin them down so they couldn't escape. Deeks also knew that pretty soon half the city was going to be out front and helping them. They just needed to help stop the gunfire on the building. They got to the front of the building and everyone took cover as they fired back at the gang members. It was an intense few minutes while they fired back and waited for the back-up to show. Both L.A.P.D and NCIS tactical teams arrived and they were able to add help to getting the gunfire to stop. It was a good thirty minutes after they had arrived did it finally end.

The street was a mess; cars were on fire and destroyed by a hail of bullets. There were dead bodies all throughout the street and people injured. The stations front entrance was destroyed by the explosion and still smoking. The windows were blown out from bullets and the sign was destroyed and smashed on the ground. There was glass everywhere and blood on the ground.

"We need all available ambulances here right away." Deeks told one of the tactical officers with a radio.

The officer radioed it in for all available ambulances to be brought down to the station. Within a few minutes you could already hear the sirens. Deeks ran into the building to see what he could do to help. Officers were injured all over the place and same with prisoners and victims that were making complaints and statements.

"We need to get the injured outside." Bates called out so everyone could hear him.

Deeks, Callen, Sam and Kensi all started to help bring the injured outside so the paramedics could work on them faster. It would also make it easier to prioritize the injured so they were able to get the most injured to the hospital first. The next hour went by in a blur. They were able to get everyone out of the station so it was empty and would be able to be used to assess the damage. The building itself was fine, it was just a little smoky and the front was destroyed. Paramedics were running around trying to help everyone and get everyone fixed up that was injured. Callen, Sam, Kensi and Walker were standing off to the side just watching and trying to be out of the way. Deeks was talking to a few different officers about what to do with the prisoners and the victims that were in reporting a crime.

"Walker" Callen said.

"Ya?"

"I thought fellow officers hate Deeks." Callen said.

"They do." Walker answered.

"Then why are they listening to him?" Callen asked.

"Well Deeks does have a higher ranking then most of them. So for that they have to listen to him. They don't like Deeks, because he's been undercover for IAB and has put some fellow officers in jail. So people believe that you don't turn against your own no matter what. Deeks doesn't believe that. He doesn't believe you should protect and lie for cops that are dirty, especially if it is getting innocent people killed. So a lot of officers don't like him because of that. Some of the newer ones that have heard of Deeks are uncomfortable around him. They think if they do something wrong Deeks will go straight to IAB about them, which isn't true. They listen to him though, because they respect him. He's done a lot to earn that respect with his undercover operations. So day to day activities they will give him a hard time and treat him like crap, but when emergencies like this happen they will listen to him. When they need a leader and someone to help handle a situation they will look to Deeks, because they know he'll get it done." Walker explained.

"So they treat him like garbage until they need him." Kensi said with a slight anger in her voice.

"Pretty much ya." Walker said as Deeks made his way towards them. Walker headed off towards fellow officers that were being treated by paramedics.

"This is nuts." Callen said looking at the mess in front of him.

"It's only going to get worse. You guys didn't have to be here or call in a squad." Deeks said.

"You are a part of this team Deeks. We aren't going to stand around and just watch this happen. We need to put an end to this." Callen said.

"We need to get that cartel taken care of. With them no longer controlling things, the gangs should go back to normal." Sam said.

Hetty came down the street towards the station. She couldn't believe how bad the attack was on the station. Eric and Nell had called her up to Ops to explain the situation to her when everyone had headed over to the station to help. Hetty knew that this was going to get worse as long as the cartel was in control. So she headed over to the station so she could speak to everyone and Bates.

"Hetty what are you doing here?" Deeks asked.

"We still have an operation to sort out. I figured it would be easier to speak to Lieutenant Bates here. We need a plan and we need one fast before the whole city goes crazy." Hetty said.

"I think Bates is inside." Deeks said.

"Let's go find him then." Sam said.

They started to walk towards the entrance as they made their way over there Deeks called out to Walker so he could join them. Deeks wasn't going to keep Walker out of the loop. He had a right to know what the plan was. They all headed inside and started to look for Bates. He was over talking to the fire Chief about the building. Bates looked over to see Hetty and everyone standing there waiting for him so he finished his conversation up real quick. Bates went over to the small group so he could speak to them.

"I think the second floor is still in tacked. Let's go to the stairs and head up. I'm assuming there is a lot you need to explain to me." Bates said.

"We do." Hetty said.

Bates led the way to the stairway so they could go up to the second floor and hopefully find an office that they could talk in. The second floor didn't have any damage at all and the whole building was emptied. They headed down the hallway where the offices were and they went into one of the conference rooms. Once everyone was inside the room Bates closed the door so they would have complete privacy.

"Alright, what the hell is going on?" Bates asked.

"Remember that cartel that I have been working on for a year now?" Walker asked.

"Satan's Angels. What about it?" Bates said.

"We haven't been able to get anything on them, but last night I caught a little break. Jason Deeks was arrested same with Mary Deeks. Jason had been seen with some of the runners for the cartel. I called Deeks this morning and sent him an email giving him a basic description of the case. He agreed to get Jason and Mary out of jail and NCIS agreed to help, because of the military weapons. Jason finally told us three names for the runners Booger, Sticky and Scar."

"Scar as in Max's friend?" Bates asked Deeks.

"Ya" Deeks said.

"Our technical analysts were able to track some of the military weapons that were micro-chipped. It's a new protocol that was put in place so if any weapons were stolen or had gone missing they would easily be found. Not all of the weapons that were stolen had them so we were only able to locate a handful. All of the weapons that we located are in L.A and were given to gangs." Hetty explained.

"Why would a cartel do that?" Bates asked.

"The thing with this cartel is its being run differently. The guy that everyone thinks is in charge is just a front. The cartel is being run like a business, by a business man behind the scenes. The cartel has their hands in drugs, weapon trafficking, homicides and human trafficking now. Their men aren't the only ones doing the dirty work though, he's hiring outside to other gangs to handle some of the things. In return he's giving them weapons, money and drugs." Deeks said.

"So he's operating this cartel as a business. How far does it go? Is it just L.A?" Bates asked.

"Our analysts have been able to track the human trafficking to all over the States and the weapons are going overseas as well. They are taking young children from Mexico." Callen said.

"Our analysts found some online communication between all of the major gangs in L.A. They declared war against the L.A.P.D. This was their first strike." Sam said.

"What does that have to do with this cartel?" Bates asked.

"I think the cartel is up to something huge and they are using this as a distraction. They're going to steal something and need all officers busy. What better way to keep the heat off from you then to start an all out war?" Deeks said.

"If we shut this cartel down we can end this war. The gangs will go back to killing each other and fighting over turf. This cartel is keeping them all in check, because he's giving them work and everything they need. Once the cartel is gone they will have to go back to their old ways." Walker said.

"This is the biggest station in L.A. If they were more intelligent with explosives this whole building could have gone up. There are a thousand officers in this building at any given time, plus the prisoners, victims and eye witnesses. Obviously they are serious about this war. The whole city is in jeopardy." Bates said.

"9-1-1 calls will increase, false calls will increase, officers will transfer out, call in sick, quit; officers will get too scared to go on calls leaving innocent people in danger. None of this is good. I know in a time like this that you call back all officers. I think you need to focus on shutting this cartel down if you want everything to go back to normal Mr. Bates." Hetty said.

"Scar is the way in. Deeks you have to go undercover." Bates said.

"He can't go undercover. He's not cleared for field work." Kensi said.

"I don't have a choice. Look around this is only going to get worse. The only way in right now is through Scar and Max already has a friendship with him." Bates said.

"Deeks isn't going undercover." Sam said.

"Bates I can't. You know why I can't. I'm not ready, especially to be him." Deeks said softly looking at Bates.

"Can someone please tell me what the hell happened to screw him up?" Walker asked annoyed.

"It's none of your business." Kensi said with attitude back at Walker.

"This is my investigation. So I think it is my business when the only person that has the ability to go undercover is refusing to go. That makes it my business." Walker said clearly angry.

"I was tortured. Me and another Agent were tortured three months ago. This is literally my first day back. I'm not going." Deeks said with anger in his voice.

He didn't want to go undercover; he didn't want to be Max Gentry, because he couldn't handle being him. He was still having problems sleeping and being around people. He wasn't okay and he knew that. That was why he didn't fight when he was only going to be on desk duty. He was okay with just working a case from inside the mission. He knew he wasn't ready.

"Deeks listen to me for a minute." Bates said softly.

Deeks looked at Bates and waited for him to continue.

"I know you know what is going to happen and who is already on his way down here. Right now I have control, but once the Chief of Police shows up here he will have all control and say in everything. He will kick NCIS out of here and make this only an L.A.P.D case. He will make you go in or he'll take your badge away from you and you know that. I know you aren't ready I don't blame you. There isn't a person in this room that blames you. I understand you aren't ready. I was more than happy to let you slowly get back into it. Whether that was months or years I was more than willing to wait and leave you over there at NCIS. This situation changes everything and I don't have a choice I have to push you into the deep end and you need to remember how to swim. I have control right now, but only while the Chief of Police is not here. Once he finds out about this he will take control. So an operation already needs to be put into place. You have to go in and you know you do, just like you know you will go, but I'm not saying you go alone."

"I'm not going into a cartel this powerful and dangerous with some rookie or undercover I don't know. They say one thing wrong and we are both dead." Deeks said.

"What about someone at NCIS? We leave this as a joint operation with NCIS at the point. You have better technology and ways to keep track of your agents. You have far more resources than we do. I don't care if this turns out to be the biggest bust in L.A history and NCIS takes the credit. I just want this cartel dealt with and L.A can go back to normal. Once an operation is already established the Chief of Police can't say anything about it. NCIS has every reason to be involved, because of the military weapons. Deeks has the alias to get you in, what if you sent in an agent with him as backup?" Bates said trying to find some sort of solution that would work.

"I'll go. I have the military background. I could be used for information on the bases and weapons." Sam suggested.

"Ya, because us working together always ends so well." Deeks said with anger.

"I'll go with you. You are my partner I will be there with you to back you up." Kensi said.

"Max Gentry doesn't do girlfriends. Scar will know that and automatically think something is up." Bates said.

"Well that leaves Mr. Hanna and Mr. Callen. What do you think Mr. Deeks?" Hetty asked.

"I think there's a reason I'm on desk duty." Deeks said frustrated that he was going to have to do this when he truly didn't want to. Deeks started to pace and they all knew that was a sign that he was upset.

"Deeks" Kensi said gently.

"I don't know if I can do this." Deeks said softly back.

"You can do this Deeks, because you are not doing it alone. The team is here for you and with you. This won't be another L.A.P.D operation. You won't be going in with nothing, but a driver's license. You are going in with an ear piece so we can be in contact at all times. You are going in with Sam or myself. You are going to be in a safe house so your apartment doesn't get burned. You can do this." Callen said in his team leader voice.

"I think Mr. Hanna would be better for this. It's easy to make him an ex-seal that was dishonorable discharged and looking for some payback. He also has the most knowledge of the military on the team. The most important question is though, Mr. Deeks do you trust Mr. Hanna to have your back?" Hetty asked.

They all looked at Deeks to see what he would say. It was no secret that Deeks was still upset with Sam for what he said to him about his character. Deeks had every right to still be upset over it. He had taken a lot of crap from Sam over the last three years all, because Sam thought that Deeks' character wasn't good enough. That he wasn't good enough for the team or for his trust.

"He's the one that doesn't trust me." Deeks said back.

"I trust you Deeks." Sam said.

"Oh that's right not my character. Could have sworn that was the same thing, but I am just a cop." Deeks said back.

"Deeks" Sam started, but Deeks wasn't going to hear any of it.

"We need to do something about Jason and Mary. We need to have them locked up and in solitude while this is happening. We can't risk one of them making a call." Deeks said to Bates.

"Where are they now?" Bates asked.

"In the boatshed." Deeks said back.

"As long as it is alright with you Hetty, I will pick them up and personally bring them to a prison. I'll make sure the warden and his guards all know to keep them in solitude and not to let them make any phone calls until this is over." Bates said.

"That's fine with me." Hetty said.

"When are we doing this?" Walker asked.

"I think tomorrow would be best. We will head back to our center and have Mr. Hanna's alias created and backstopped. We will also improve Mr. Deeks' alias to make up for the time difference. Tomorrow we can start on getting into the cartel." Hetty said.

"Walker, I know this has been your investigation so I will keep you in the loop. From here on out this is mostly an NCIS investigation. I hope you will keep me in the loop." Bates said.

"I will." Hetty said.

"Deeks, I know you are not happy about this. I owe you big for this." Bates said.

"He dies. When this is over Max Gentry dies. I'm not doing it anymore." Deeks said softly.

Bates held his hand out as he spoke. "You have my word." Deeks shook Bates hand to seal the deal.

"Let's head back to Ops we have a lot of work ahead of us." Hetty said.

"Thank-you for your help." Bates said.

"L.A.P.D has been there for us when we needed them. Happy to return the favor." Callen said.

They all followed Hetty down the stairs and out of the building. They had a lot of work ahead of them and they needed to get started. They would be starting an operation in less than twenty-four hours. An operation that would again break-up the partners and put Sam and Deeks together again. Hetty was hoping that they would be able to work through their problems and be able to fix what has always been broken. Hetty knew it was possible if Sam stopped judging Deeks and if Deeks could let go what happened between them and the hurtful words that Sam had said to him. Hetty was hoping that maybe this operation would do the trick.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Sam, Callen, Kensi, Deeks and Hetty arrived back at the mission so they could get to work on this new operation. Kensi was pissed that Deeks was being forced to go undercover when even he himself said he wasn't ready for it. Hetty went to her office so she could speak to Nate about Sam and Deeks. Sam and Callen went upstairs to speak with Eric and Nell about backstopping a new alias. Kensi was about to follow when she saw Deeks going down the hallway to the locker rooms.

"I'll be up in a minute." Kensi said to Sam and Callen before she went after Deeks.

Sam and Callen continued on upstairs, but they would wait for Deeks to come up before they got into the alias. Deeks would have a better understanding and idea for what the alias would need. Sam and Callen went up the stairs and could see Eric and Nell worried about what had just happened.

"Is everyone okay?" Eric asked once he saw Sam and Callen.

"Everyone is fine. A lot of police were injured, but we're all fine." Sam said.

"It's all over the news and we've been monitoring traffic of 9-1-1 calls and the numbers have already doubled throughout the city." Nell said.

"Are police responding?" Callen asked.

"They are, but they are taking longer to respond. They must not be ready just yet for this." Eric said.

"They just found out that all of the local gangs are declaring war against them. It's going to be crazy and disorganized for a few hours while everyone gets called in and situated." Sam said.

"Monitor the calls and see which ones are ambushes as which ones are real. See if any of the same numbers come up and we can pass it along. Maybe we can help keep a few officers from being killed." Callen said.

"We already are." Nell said.

"What is this going to do for Deeks?" Eric asked.

"The cartel is controlling all of this. Bates doesn't have much of a choice he is putting Deeks undercover as Max Gentry. Max is friends with Scar, one of the runners and he can get into the cartel easily enough." Callen said.

"But Deeks isn't cleared for field duty." Nell said.

"Bates doesn't have a choice. The Chief of police was already on his way and he would have made Deeks go and kicked us off. So Bates is letting us run the show so we can keep an eye on Deeks. I'm also going under with him." Sam said.

"And Deeks is okay with that?" Nell asked.

"Not in the least. He doesn't want to go under and he feels like he isn't ready to go undercover as Max, but he knows he doesn't have a choice. Kensi is talking to him right now. When he gets up here then we can work on Sam's alias. I'm not sure what Deeks is thinking about it." Callen said.

"He's safer with us at least then L.A.P.D" Eric said.

"You need to talk to him before you go under tomorrow." Callen said to Sam.

"I know. I will tonight." Sam said.

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Hetty made her way over to her desk. She didn't see Nate anywhere so when she sat down she called his office phone. When he answered she asked him to come down to speak to her. Hetty really did need to know what Nate thought of not only Deeks going undercover, but with Sam going with him. Hetty knew there was still anger on Deeks' end towards Sam. She was worried that Deeks wouldn't be able to let that go for this operation. If anyone in the cartel thinks that they aren't who they say they are then they will be killed. Hetty didn't want a repeat of three months ago. She wanted them to be safe and be able to work together. Callen and Kensi worked well together. Callen and Deeks worked well together. Kensi and Sam worked well together. The only ones that couldn't seem to work with each other were Sam and Deeks. Hetty needed that to be fixed so she wouldn't have to worry about sending them undercover together. Sam was perfect to send in with Deeks on this operation. Sam had the most military background and training. He would be able to provide any information that the leader of this cartel wanted. He also looked like he was ex-military, where Callen didn't. If this operation was going to happen it had to be Deeks and Sam undercover together. Hetty was hoping that Nate might have an idea to help them get passed all of this.

Nate walked over to Hetty's desk to see what she wanted.

"You called Hetty." Nate said.

"Have you heard about this cartel and war between L.A.P.D and local gangs?" Hetty asked.

"Nell filled me in. She was worried about Marty and him being called in for it." Nate answered.

"Unfortunately Mr. Deeks has to go undercover as Max Gentry for this cartel. This cartel is behind all of this chaos and until they are shut down many lives will be killed. Lieutenant Bates has allowed NCIS to take the lead on this case. So Mr. Deeks and Mr. Hanna will be going undercover tomorrow together to put an end to this cartel. I'm curious as to what you think about that."

"I think it's reckless and dangerous. I understand that this cartel needs to be taken care of, but I don't agree to Marty going undercover, especially with Sam right now."

"What concerns do you have for Mr. Deeks being undercover?"

"Hetty you can't be serious. Physically he's not even healed. His right wrist is still in a brace and firing a gun could potentially injure it further. He still has the metal plates in his mouth. He's still on pain medication that is thinning his blood and until he is off the pain medication he can't be on the proper medication he needs to help his blood clot. By being in the field and undercover as Max Gentry he's at a greater risk of being stabbed or shot. If that happened he could bleed out before he even got to the hospital. His jaw is like glass and still very painful, he's still covered in bruises. That's just the physical problems. Mentally and emotionally he's a complete wreck. He still has flashbacks, not as often or severe, but they are still there. He has anxiety attacks when he's surrounded by people he doesn't know. He still gets nightmares and is only sleeping a few days a week. He doesn't go out during busy hours at stores, he waits until they are almost closed to get groceries. Combine all of that with his anger and problems with Sam. Hetty I stand by my original decision that Marty is not ready for field work of any kind." Nate said with authority in his voice.

"I understand that Mr. Deeks is not in the best mindset. Like I said though, he doesn't have a choice. Mr. Deeks is part of L.A.P.D and if he doesn't go undercover with us then the Chief of Police will force him to go undercover for them. Mr. Deeks will be undercover all alone and without any backup. This was the only compromise that we could come up with. I don't like this anymore than you do or Mr. Deeks does, but it's the only way to keep him safe. I need you to speak to Mr. Hanna and see what is going on with their relationship. Mr. Hanna needs to figure out how to make it right and by tomorrow. I know they won't have a perfect relationship within the next twenty-four hours, but I need them to at least start to work together."

"I'll speak to Sam, but I'm not clearing Marty for this operation. Marty was the one to tell me he wasn't ready for anything more than desk duty. I stand by my decision. If you put him in the field then it will be against my recommendations."

"If the situation was different I would completely agree with you. However, I will not let Mr. Deeks be put undercover for L.A.P.D all alone. Once this operation is complete he will be going right back to desk duty until he has your clearance. While this operation is going on I will need your help with Mr. Deeks and Mr. Hanna. They both will be placed in safe houses and you will still be able to visit them."

"I'll do this, but only because of Marty. Someone needs to put him first before everyone else. I'll do this for him." Nate said.

"Thank-you Mr. Getz. I know you are upset about this and if the situation was different I would not let Mr. Deeks go undercover. You know how serious this situation is. Until this cartel is shut down the whole city will be in chaos. I don't like this anymore than you do. I just want them both back home and safe."

"This is a bad idea, but I'll speak with Sam and get him to start to repair the damage he has done. I'll be keeping a close eye on Marty."

"I know you will. Let's go upstairs so you can hear the operation and the plan. We don't have much time to set it up." Hetty said as she got up.

Nate followed Hetty upstairs to the Ops room. He was not happy at all that Deeks was going undercover especially as Max Gentry and even more so with Sam. Nate trusted Sam and he knew that Sam would keep Deeks safe and do his job. That wasn't Nate's problem. His problem was that Deeks was not Sam's biggest fan right now. Deeks was very hurt by what Sam has said and done in the past three years and now he wasn't going to hide it anymore. Deeks was upset and hurt and he was not ready for any of this. Nate was very worried about how Deeks would handle everything and if he would even be able to complete this operation. All it would take was just one flashback and they could be made. They went upstairs and saw that Deeks and Kensi were not up there yet.

"Where are Miss. Blye and Mr. Deeks?" Hetty asked.

"They aren't here yet. Kensi went to speak to Deeks." Callen said.

"We're just waiting for Deeks so we can figure out an alias." Sam said.

"Well while we wait let's catch Mr. Getz up to speed then shall we." Hetty said.

Callen began to explain what they knew so far about the cartel while they waited for Deeks and Kensi to come up to join them.

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Deeks needed a minute alone so he went into the locker room so he could try and get his head on straight before he went up to Ops. He couldn't believe that he was being forced to go undercover as Max Gentry. He wasn't ready for this and he knew he wasn't ready for this. Deeks was trying to best to catch his breath and to try and stop the panic attack that he could feel coming up. Deeks was standing and had his hands on the lockers with his head down trying to catch his breath. He just needed to focus and he would be able to stop the panic attack. He was fine in the moment, but now that the adrenaline had worn off everything was hitting him. Deeks heard the locker room door open and he knew that it would be Kensi. He heard it close and then footsteps. He looked up and saw that Kensi was standing beside him. She had worry etched all over her face.

"Deeks?"

"Talk about something." Deeks said with a soft voice.

Kensi had seen Deeks have a few panic attacks over the last twelve weeks. Talking always seemed to help him get over the panic attack and even stop it before it truly began.

"I was thinking about getting a puppy. I thought it might be nice for Monty to have a friend he could play with and teach all of his bad habits to. But puppies are a lot of work and time. What do I do with a puppy while I'm here at work? I don't want Monty to be jealous that I have a puppy. I don't want him to think I don't love him as much as I do. I'm not really a pet person ya know? Even growing up I never had a pet. I had fish, but they always died. Same with plants. I cannot keep a plant alive to save my soul." Kensi said lightly trying to get Deeks' mind to focus on something else.

"You'd have to clean your apartment if you got a puppy." Deeks said.

"Oh see then I'm definitely not getting a puppy. I couldn't stand living in a completely clean house. I don't know how you do it. Every time I'm at your place I just want to throw things around to mess it up."

Deeks let out a small chuckle as he pushed himself away from the locker and started to pace around slightly.

"That's because you are a hoarder. It's an actual psychological issue. You should talk to Nate about that."

"Ya you should talk to Nate about your OCD." Kensi joked back.

"I'm not OCD, I'm clean. Okay I'm a little OCD, but that's better than being a hoarder."

"I'm not a hoarder." Kensi said with a smile.

"First step to decluttering your life is to declutter your home."

"My life isn't cluttered. Why are you so picky about your house being clean anyways?" Kensi asked. She actually was curious as to why Deeks was such a clean freak.

Deeks let out a deep breath and then sat down on the bench with one leg on each side looking at Kensi. Kensi sat down the same way facing Deeks.

"Growing up the house was always dirty. I would clean it, but there really was no point within two hours it was a mess all over again. I would always hide in my room and I would clean, because that's the only form of power I had. I could clean my room and keep it any way I want it, it was mine. It was the only control in my life that I had and it always stuck with me. So now twenty-two years later the only constant control in my life is cleaning. So my house and my desks are always clean. I guess that makes me a little OCD, but it's just one of those things from growing up that stuck with me over the years. What about you? Why are you so messy?"

"Kinda the same reason as yours. Except for me growing up with a military father the house was like a museum. This place was so clean you could eat off the floor. To me it always felt cold and lonely. It was a house, but it looked like no one lived there. It's how my father was and when I started to live on my own I cleaned when I wanted to. I wanted it to feel like a home that someone lived there. I have boxes of things from my dad. Things from growing up that I should go through and get rid of, but it's a part of him and I can't help, but think that if I throw it away it's like I'm throwing part of him away. So that's why I hold on to things and why my house is messy."

"Makes sense to me."

"You feeling better?" Kensi asked with concern in her voice.

"Ya I'm fine now. Adrenaline wore off I guess. I know I've done this before. I've done it many, many times before, but right now it just seems like there's so much to do to get ready for this op."

"You haven't gone undercover in a while Deeks. You've gone for a day here and there, but a full undercover operation it's been almost three years. It's a lot to get back into especially as an alias that you hate."

"I don't know if I can do this Kens." Deeks said softly.

"You can do this Deeks. I know you can. You won't be alone. I can't be there with you, but I can come and see you at night. You won't be alone in this Deeks. I'll be here for whenever you need me. Tell me about Max." Kensi said softly back.

"I told you he's just a guy."

"A guy that you created while you were living on the streets. Why didn't you ever tell me Deeks? You knew I lived on the streets, kinda seemed like the perfect time to bring it up."

"My past isn't good. I don't talk about it and I don't need people judging me from it."

"I don't care about your past. I know it was horrible. I met your mother and step-father I know they are horrible people. I know the man that you are today and your past doesn't change that, but it would still be nice to know about it. You know about mine."

"Your past is a lot better than mine."

"I know. I care about you Deeks. Your past truly doesn't mean anything to me or my opinion of you. But I want to know everything about you. Just like you want to know everything about me."

"I'm sure Walker told you a few things."

"Just that you were homeless for four years, but your mother brought that up anyways. Along with a few other things. Walker said if we wanted to know your story to ask you. So I'm asking."

"What things did my mother say?" Deeks asked slightly panicked.

"She didn't say it to us she was arguing with Jason in the room. She said that you were born addicted to heroin. That your father tied you up outside when you were five for three days in a storm to kill you, but it just made you sick. That's all we heard. Sam turned the microphones off so we wouldn't have to listen to it anymore." Kensi said gently making sure to leave out the part about the molestation.

Deeks just gave a distant nod and Kensi knew his mind was trying to process what he had just heard. Kensi knew that Deeks liked to have his private life kept private. There had been a few times when Deeks had told her something, but it was never from growing up. It was usually something to do with L.A.P.D and the operations that he had been on.

"I was terrified of thunderstorms. When I was five one night it was a really bad storm and I was so scared. I went into my parents' room and that was the dumbest mistake I could have made. Dad was drunk, beyond drunk and mom was high as a kite. He said I needed to be taught a lesson so he tied me up outside and they forgot about me for three days while they drank and did heroin. The worst part was the school didn't even notice I wasn't there for three days. The school in my neighborhood was terrible the teachers didn't care. They saw kids all the time with bruises and broken bones and they never even thought twice about it or asked what happened."

"That's horrible. Deeks I'm sorry all of that happened to you. I'm sorry you didn't have a good life growing up. I couldn't imagine going to school and my teachers not even caring."

"It still happens today that's why I'm part of this charity."

"You're a part of a charity? Since when?"

"About eight years now. It's a great charity. They have fundraisers so they can spread information to teachers and students about child abuse. Some kids are being abused and they don't even know it. They grew up with it and thought it was normal. So they help get the information out there to students and teachers. They also built a house just for kids that are being abused. They can go there for a night or longer to get away from it and get help. Some kids will get help and admit to the abuse, but most won't. So this building at least gives them a safe place to be for the night when they need to get away. I like to help out whenever I can."

"That sounds like a great charity. What's it called?"

"Homebase Hope. It is a great charity after this operation is over I should go and see them."

"I'll go with you." Kensi said with a smile.

"I usually bring Monty to the building the kids go crazy over him."

"He's a great dog. Ugly, but great." Kensi joked.

"He's not ugly, he's scruffy. It builds character. One day that dog will save your life."

"Well he's already helped us find a bomb so I believe you. Do you have any siblings?"

"One younger sister. She's in University out in New York. She's doing great."

"What did she go for?"

"Marketing communications management. It's supposed to be the best in NYU so she got student loans and scholarships and she went. I couldn't be more proud of her."

"Is she going to come back after she graduates?"

"She didn't know about leaving when she got accepted. She didn't want to leave me behind. I told her to live her life. To leave and to never look back. I didn't have contact with mom unless she was in jail. My sister, mom called her a lot and would show up at her work begging for money. She just couldn't get a break. She better not come back here and I tell her that every time she calls and feels guilty about leaving. She didn't have it the way I did growing up. They never hit her, but she was still around it; the yelling, the prostitutes and drugs. It didn't screw her up though; it made her want to be out of there faster. She graduated high school when she was sixteen just so she could move out. She went to College here first and lived in the dorms then when she turned eighteen she decided to switch to University. Even when I was kicked out I still went to the house every morning to walk her to school and walk her back home. I did what I could to take care of her and I couldn't be happier that she's out of this city."

"Have you ever visited her?"

"Not yet. She graduates in two years. I promised I would be there for that. I should go sometime this year to see her. I've never been to New York, but I'm not going during winter. I hear snow is cold." Deeks lightly joked.

"You've seriously never been around snow?"

"Never seen it in person. I've always been in L.A. The only time I fly is with you guys."

"Oh we are going on a trip this winter and you are going to see snow." Kensi said with a smile.

"I don't like snow. I don't like the cold."

"Ya you are so going with me somewhere." Kensi smiled.

"The only place we should be going is upstairs. I'm sure they are waiting for us." Deeks said trying to change the subject.

"Oh we are so talking about this later." Kensi said as Deeks got up so he could leave the locker room. Before he left Kensi grabbed his arm gently so she could say one last thing while they were alone. "You can do this. You can text me and call me as much as you want Deeks. I'm here for you no matter what happens."

"I know you are. You're the only thing getting me through all of this." Deeks said back.

"I'll always be here for you."

Kensi gave Deeks a hug and Deeks held her close to him. They had yet to talk or do anything about the kiss, but Deeks didn't care. He knew that she was waiting for him to get better before they had that discussion and Deeks was fine with that. He knew he couldn't handle much more right now, so he was more than happy to wait until they were both ready. After a few minutes Deeks let go.

"We should get up there."

Kensi gave a nod and they left the safety of the locker room and headed upstairs to Ops. When they got upstairs they saw that everyone, including Nate, was there and waiting for them.

"Sorry." Deeks said as him and Kensi went over to join the rest of them.

"You good Deeks?" Callen asked with concern in his voice.

"Ya" Deeks said, but they all knew that wasn't true.

"We just finished updating Mr. Getz on everything that happened and on what we know." Hetty said.

"Nell and I have been monitoring 9-1-1 calls to see what ones are ambushes and to see if the same number comes up. We can pass them along to L.A.P.D to help them out." Eric said.

"Good. Thanks" Deeks said.

"We need to create a new alias for Mr. Hanna, but first I think we should update Mr. Deeks' alias. That won't take as long to sort out." Hetty said.

"Well Max Gentry made that one day appearance with Monica for Granger. Other than that he's been gone for over a year." Eric said.

"We also need to come up with a reason why Max might be a little off. Because I can't guarantee that he won't be a little off." Deeks admitted.

"We also need a reason why Sam and Deeks would be so close." Kensi said.

"Max showed up four months ago, so what about prison? Sam could have been your cellmate. Something could have happened in prison to you and Sam was protective of you. That would explain why the two of you are close and why Max might be having some problems." Callen suggested.

"I could make it so that Max was attacked by a group of inmates and it put you into the hospital for a while. When you went to Waltz club that could be the first night you were released." Eric suggested.

"The attack would have to be pretty big to make it believable." Sam said.

"I can make the incident report say whatever I want." Eric said.

"I think that's our best shot right now. Sam could have been in jail for something and we were in the same cell block." Deeks said.

"Okay, so what were you in jail for?" Eric asked Deeks as he turned to his computer to get working on the documents.

"It has to be something good for the cartel leader to want Max to move up in the company." Deeks said.

"Does Max have previous charges?" Kensi asked.

"Assaults, drug trafficking, possession of illegal chemicals, auto thief, and breaking and entering. Every time I had to go undercover for a different case they just added on the right charges." Deeks said.

"What about some kind of heist? This cartel is planning on stealing something big. It's not too hard to believe that you stepped up from B&E's." Callen said.

"Heist where though? He got caught." Sam said.

"Do a weapons charge and suspected in bank robbery. Max knows a lot of people. So I'm not usually there for the heist, but I can run it and organize it. This guy is hiring out jobs if I can get him to believe I know the right people for this job it might be what we need to shut them down. If I can find out what this job is then we can use NCIS agents to act like they are a criminal team and then we can take them all down." Deeks said.

"So Max just runs the show and finds the right people for the job." Kensi said.

"That could work. That way you've never been caught for running and organizing heists, but you still went to jail. Weapon charge can get you fourteen months." Callen said.

"Okay so we know what to do for Deeks. Now what are we doing for Sam?" Nell asked.

They would need a couple hours to get everything set up for both Deeks and Sam. Nell and Eric needed all the information that they could get so tomorrow Sam and Deeks would be ready to go in.

"Sam met Deeks in jail, but he should be in there longer than Deeks. Deeks was out four months ago. I think Sam should be out just this week." Callen said.

"He's also ex-military so we should do something with that. Maybe he was caught giving out military information or stealing military weapons. Something that will get this leader interested in Sam." Kensi said.

"Why was Sam kicked out of the military?" Deeks asked.

"What about weapon trafficking? Sam could have been a floater around bases. It would explain his knowledge of the bases and where the weapons are. He could have been stealing the weapons and selling them on the streets. He was discharged, but the charges were never proven. The police picked him up right in the middle of a sell. That would get him at least two years with good behaviour." Nate suggested.

"I like that. In the military I was an arms specialist so that would explain all the knowledge of military weapons and why I would bounce around." Sam said.

"Okay we can work with that." Eric said.

"Deeks' alias won't take long to complete, but Sam's will take us a few hours to get set up." Nell said.

"That's fine, take your time. We need this to be perfect." Hetty said.

"When are we going in?" Deeks asked.

"Are you able to contact Daniel Phillip Mr. Deeks?" Hetty asked.

"Phone call, no, but I know where he'll probably be."

"Could you see him tonight?" Callen asked.

"He's usually at this one bar. I could go by tonight and see if he's there." Deeks said.

"I can go with you so we can get the ball rolling." Sam said.

"Do we have anything up to date on Scar?" Deeks asked and completely ignored Sam.

"We do." Nell said as she pulled up the file on Scar and put it on the big screen, including a picture of him.

"Did he get the nickname before or after that scar?" Sam asked.

Scar definitely looked rough. He had brown hair that in the picture was unkempt, dead looking brown eyes and down the left half of his face was a long scar.

"After." Deeks said.

"How did he get the scar?" Kensi asked.

"From me." Deeks said.

"Are you willing to tell the story?" Callen asked Deeks.

"Well as you guys now know I was living on the street at fourteen. I had been there for three months. Ray had been with me that night, because his dad was drunk and getting violent so he left for the night. After I shot my dad the police took the gun so Ray had given me a pocket knife to keep with me just in case. We had been hiding down an alley just waiting until morning when Ray's dad left to go to work so we could go there. Scar came down the alley and started talking about how we were in his territory. He was a part of some local gang. Ray and I didn't want any trouble so we went to leave, but Scar had a different idea. A fight broke out and Ray is older and was bigger than me so he pushed me out of the way. Scar was bigger than Ray and he got into some trouble so I jumped in. At one point I pulled out the knife thinking it would scare him away, it didn't. We started to fight and we ended up on the ground. At one point I swung my arm out to try and get him off from me and I cut him by accident at the same time. That scared him away. Ray and I were freaking out, because we didn't know if the gang would come looking for us. Sure enough the next day Scar shows up with half of his gang."

"Looking for payback." Callen said.

"No actually, they wanted us to join them. Apparently no one on the street fights Scar, because they are too afraid. The leader of the gang, Street Devils, wanted Ray and I to join. We were cautious, but we joined. You lived longer on the street with friends and it was better to be on top then a victim so we joined. Obviously Ray continued on with the gang and other ones after that. I turned eighteen graduated high school and went to law school on a crap load of student loans. I passed the bar and the first thing I did was fight to have my juvi record sealed. Scar apparently just kept bouncing around from gang to gang." Deeks finished.

"And that is exactly what he did. He was with the Street Devils for a good ten years before they got taken over by the Bloods. Scar has been bouncing from then on with different gangs. He's new to Satan's Angels. He has been there for about six months now. He's been in and out of jail his whole life mostly for the usual gang crimes, drugs, assaults and theft." Nell said.

"So we see Scar tonight and get him talking. See if we can get into the cartel and set up a time to meet them." Sam said.

"What about safe houses?" Callen asked.

"Mr. Hanna will be in a safe house in case something happens, than you both can go there. Mr. Deeks, I know Max Gentry's attitude and reputation is a partier so you will be in a different apartment. We will have the apartment wired with cameras and microphones that can be turned off if need be. If you have a party and invite people from the cartel then we can hear everything and see who is there. You will have a remote to be able to turn the mics and cameras off of course. That way you are not being watched twenty-four seven." Hetty said.

"I will also be coming by to see you Marty as this operation goes on. I don't agree with any of this and I am not going to just hope you are alright. You will be seeing me at least once a week until this is over. Once this operation is over you are going right back to desk duty until I clear you for field duty." Nate said.

"Fine by me." Deeks said.

"Now Mr. Beale and Miss Jones will be working on your aliases. I will give you both a key to your new places. I suggest you get some things together so you can take them over and get it ready for tomorrow." Hetty said.

"Sam your alias will be ready by the end of the day so you can read it before you go tonight." Eric said.

"Thanks. When are we going tonight Deeks?"

"Around eleven. Any later and he'll be too drunk to remember anything." Deeks said and he was clearly not happy about Sam going with him.

"What bar?" Callen asked this time.

"Dirty Fifty. It's down on Nixon Ave. Have you ever been a criminal before?" Deeks asked with a slight rudeness to his voice.

"Deeks." Kensi said in a soft warning for him to play nice.

"It's a legitimate question." Deeks said back.

"No I haven't been undercover as a criminal other than in jail." Sam said.

"Then do your research and look the part. Or you'll get us made before we even walk through the door. I suggest you drive down there so you can see what the area is like, because I guarantee you've never been anywhere near that area."

"You do know that when we go undercover you have to act like you like me." Sam said.

"No I don't. Max doesn't like anyone. Especially judgemental jerks so it works out nicely actually." Deeks said.

"How long is this going to go on for Deeks? It's been three months." Sam said slightly annoyed.

"I guess those navy seals only know how to give people crap and not take it." Deeks said back.

"Mr. Deeks while you are waiting for your alias to be updated why don't you go to the new apartment. The key and the remote control for the cameras and microphones are in the cabinet with all the other safe houses. It's tag number five. Get your things together and bring them over. Once you are done you can come back and get your updated alias for tonight." Hetty said.

Deeks didn't say anything he just left the room. Kensi went to go after him when Nate spoke.

"Let him go Kensi. He needs sometime to breathe." Nate said gently to Kensi.

"He's not usually like this." Kensi said in Deeks' defence.

"I know Miss Blye. Mr. Deeks has been through a lot today already and it is only half over." Hetty said.

"How long is he going to keep this up? I get his point I treated him like crap, but it's been three months already. He needs to let this go." Sam said.

"He can't let it go Sam, because there is no point he's trying to make. He's genuinely upset and hurt by what you have done and said to him over the last three years. He's not going to stop until you fix what you have done wrong." Nate said with a slight anger to his voice.

"I've tried to apologise to him. He won't listen to me. He's being unreasonable."

"He won't listen to you, because he has no interest in listening to lies and B.S. Until you figure out why you treated Marty the way that you have and you tell him the truth. This relationship will only get worse. Marty will do his job, because he doesn't know how not to. Once this operation is over though, you'll be right back in the same spot. He's only going to want to hear the truth from you. So you need to figure out what that is and then you can start to fix this." Nate said.

"Maybe Sam shouldn't be going in with Deeks. I could go in instead. Deeks trusts me and we've worked together before without any problems." Callen said.

"We can do the backstopping, but when we are finished we need a picture. So you guys have to decide who is going in by then." Eric said.

"Mr. Hanna fits best for this. Mr. Deeks will be professional and get the job done. Mr. Getz is right. If you do not try and fix this relationship Mr. Hanna then this team is going to fall apart. Mr. Deeks is not an agent he could leave and go back to L.A.P.D whenever he wants. Whether you accept Mr. Deeks as an agent or as a member of this team he is and has been for three years now. This team has never functioned better since Mr. Deeks has been here. I would hate to have to pick one over the other Mr. Hanna. So fix this before I am left with no choice, but to choose one of you." Hetty said.

"You would actually consider picking Deeks over me? He's not even an agent." Sam said with shock and anger in his voice.

"Deeks is a great cop and has done this job without all of our training. God and you wonder why he's so mad at you. Even after everything he just did for your family you still think he's not good enough or at your level." Kensi said with anger in her voice.

"Deeks is a great cop, but that doesn't mean he's able to be a great agent. He doesn't have the training for it." Sam said.

"And you would be a terrible cop. Deeks doesn't need training in a building to make him good at the job. He has life training that makes him great at his job. Deeks is right you are full of yourself. You think because you were a navy seal that you're entitled and better than him. You're supposed to be the training agent; if you thought for the last three years that Deeks didn't have the training maybe you should have done your job and trained him." Kensi said.

"He never expressed or showed any interest in training." Sam said in his defence.

"He did to me. Deeks and I have spent many Saturday afternoons together." Callen said.

"Doing what?" Sam asked.

"Training; hand to hand, different weapons, take downs and raiding protocols. We've been back at the training house working on clearing protocols and working on his skills." Callen said.

"I didn't know that." Kensi said.

"Why didn't he come to me?" Sam asked.

"Seriously?" Kensi said rudely.

"Sam, you haven't been very welcoming of Marty. Why would he go to you for help or training when you treat him like trash?" Nate said.

"Deeks was thinking about signing the NCIS papers that Hetty gave him two years ago. He wanted to make sure he was ready for it. It didn't matter that he had already been doing this job he didn't think he was good enough. So Saturday afternoons we would get together and I would help him. I was hoping the training would build up his confidence." Callen said.

"Is he still going to sign the papers?" Kensi asked.

"I don't know. I haven't asked him after what happened." Callen said.

"Deeks actually has a better record than you do Sam." Eric said gently.

Eric and Nell had kept quiet this whole time. They were a part of the team, but they did something else. They weren't there every day with them downstairs and interacting with each other. They were their own partners with each other. This was a conversation for the four of them and not for Eric and Nell, but Eric thought he would at least let everyone know all of the facts.

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked.

"Well you've been a seal and helped with the C.I.A from time to time, but Deeks' record is actually more impressive. Especially when you consider that Deeks is only thirty-four and has been a cop for only eight years. Deeks graduate the academy as a detective and was placed in the undercover unit right away. He has a record of over a thousand arrests in just eight years. He's been undercover as a lot of different people and he's never been made. The only time he was, was because someone within the precinct ratted him out. He's been solely responsible for shutting down human trafficking rings, drug lords and major gangs. Deeks can literally go undercover as anything and he makes it believable. You can only be so many different people, because that's all you know how to do. You have the better title, but Deeks has the better record, especially when you consider that we do a lot of undercover work and Deeks could do any of them." Eric said carefully.

"I think Mr. Hanna you need to think very long and hard about why you treat Mr. Deeks the way that you have. You are a good agent, but so is Mr. Deeks. I suggest you go and get some things together for the safe house and scout the area of the bar. Mr. Deeks is on point for this operation and you are to follow his lead and direction. Do I make myself clear Mr. Hanna?" Hetty said with a very serious voice.

"Yes maim." Sam said.

"I'll come with you. I want to scout the area in case we have to have surveillance at some point in this operation." Callen said.

"I'll be back to get my alias in a couple of hours." Sam said to Eric and Nell.

"We'll be ready." Nell said.

"Go to the cabinet and take the key with tag number eight. The address is on the back." Hetty said.

Sam gave a nod as him and Callen left the Ops room and headed outside to go and check out the bar and get some things for the safe house. The room in Ops had a lingering tension left in the room. Kensi was angry at Sam for what he said about Deeks. Deeks wasn't just her partner; he was the man she loved. She wasn't going to tolerate anyone speaking about Deeks like that. Deeks had proven himself many times, especially in the last three months he didn't deserve this. He deserved respect, especially from Sam. At first Kensi thought that Deeks was being a little hard on Sam, but now she completely understood. Sam hadn't changed what he thought of Deeks even after what he did for his family.

"Them going undercover is a bad idea Hetty." Kensi said.

"They will both be professional. It's after the operation that concerns me." Hetty said.

"Why does Sam have such a problem with Deeks?" Nell asked.

"That's something only Sam knows and until he admits it to himself he can't start to repair the damage." Nate said.

"Are you really going to have to pick between the two of them?" Eric asked.

"I hope not Mr. Beale, I hope not. For now all we can do is prepare for this operation. So work on the aliases Mr. Beale and Miss. Jones so they can go in tonight to speak with Mr. Phillip." Hetty said.

"We'll get them done." Nell said.

"What do you need me to do?" Kensi asked.

"Wait for your partner to get back and make sure he is alright." Hetty said.

Kensi gave a nod and she headed downstairs to go to the gym. She knew that Deeks would be a little while before he got back. She could understand that he needed sometime alone to get his emotions under control and his head in the game. Kensi figured she would blow off some steam while she waited for Deeks.

Hetty and Nate went downstairs as well so Hetty could work on getting this operation completely organized. Nate wanted to speak to Hetty about what happened upstairs. Nate knew that Sam and Deeks' relationship was getting worse and unless one of them opened up the relationship was going to explode. Nate knew that the team would work if they all would just get along. Sam was good for Callen and Deeks was good for Kensi. When they got along they worked well together and the team hadn't been more successful. Deeks made the team work, he brought something special to the table and that was the ability to keep the tension light. Deeks could tell when they were all nervous or tense he was able to tell a horrible joke and instantly lighten the mood. Deeks made them a family and Nate didn't want to see that be destroyed. Hetty sat down at her desk and Nate leaned against the wall in front of her.

"They are getting worse. It seems like Mr. Hanna hasn't changed at all." Hetty said.

"Sam is stubborn, he doesn't want to admit to himself why he really has been treating Marty the way that he has. Marty is sick of it and he's finally standing up for himself with Sam. Only Sam can make this better, but he has to want to."

"This is getting out of hand." Hetty said as she shook her head slightly.

"You have another problem. If Marty leaves you could lose Kensi. She won't tolerate another partner, especially if it is because you picked Sam over Marty."

"I don't want to have to pick or break up this team. They work very well together. I just need this relationship fixed. Mr. Callen trusts Mr. Hanna in a way he's never trusted a partner before. I don't want to break any of them a part."

"It's up to Sam to fix this. Marty is not about to just let this go and go back to being treated like he is less than everyone else on the team. Sam has to make the first move to fix this and unfortunately until he does the relationship will only get more toxic and eventually will be completely destroyed beyond repair." Nate said.

"That's what I am afraid of Mr. Getz. Keep an eye on Mr. Deeks for me while he is undercover."

"I will."

Hetty looked down to do some work and Nate took that as his time to walk away. He was going to speak to Kensi, but he knew that she needed time to herself to calm down and work through it. Nate was worried that Sam wouldn't man up and fight to have a relationship with Deeks. He was worried that Sam would let this go until it exploded and Deeks just left to go back to L.A.P.D. If that happened Nate couldn't say if Kensi would stay as well or not. Kensi had grown very attached to Deeks and they worked very well together. For Kensi to have another partner and to start all over again; Nate didn't know if she would do that here. She would blame Sam for Deeks leaving and once again creating a disastrous relationship with Sam. The future of this team did rest in Sam's hands and Nate didn't know if Sam would man up and admit to Deeks why he really did treat him that way or not. Nate went into his office to get some paperwork done while he waited for Deeks to come back.

Sam and Callen were in Sam's charger and heading down to Sam's house so he could grab a bag and explain to Michelle that he was going undercover. He knew she wouldn't be too happy, but he wasn't going to let Deeks go undercover alone in this. Despite what people were thinking right now Sam did care about Deeks and he did want to fix the relationship. The problem was Deeks was being completely different than he usually is. He was being stubborn and angry, which for Deeks doesn't happen. Deeks forgives and forgets. He's happy and tells horribly stupid jokes at the wrong time. Deeks wasn't an angry and stubborn person so for Sam to try and speak to him about this was getting to be unbelievably difficult. Sam pulled into his driveway and Callen got out of the car with him. Callen had wanted to see Michelle and make sure she was doing okay. He also knew she would need some reassurance that Sam would be okay on this operation. Sam opened the door and called out to his wife.

"Michelle"

Michelle came around the corner from the kitchen.

"Hey baby, Callen what are you guys doing here?" Michelle asked.

"I need to grab a few things. I'm going on an operation tomorrow."

"Operation where?" Michelle asked with a slight anger to her voice.

"Baby, sit down and I'll explain everything." Sam said gently.

Michelle gave Sam a look as she sat down on the couch and waited for when Sam would tell her what was going on. Callen and Sam both sat down, Sam on the couch next to his wife and Callen in the chair.

"There is this cartel called Satan's Angels and they are stealing military weapons and selling them overseas and to local gangs. They are also in a drug ring and a human trafficking ring. In the last year they have killed over two thousand people from other cartels. They attack a bigger cartel kill the leader and any men that won't follow them. Those that choose to live are being forced to join them. The cartel is planning something big, because they gave some of the weapons to local gangs and now they have declared war against the L.A.P.D. We went down to station twenty-nine, which is Deeks' station, to help them when they were attacked just a few hours ago."

"I saw it on the news. Every news station is going crazy with reports of this war." Michelle said.

"We were able to end the attack on the station and we explained all of this to Lieutenant Bates, Deeks' lieutenant. We got three names of drug runners for this cartel and an old alias of Deeks' knows one of the runners. His lieutenant is making Deeks go undercover for them. Bates doesn't have a choice, because once the Chief of Police found out that Deeks had a way into the cartel he would have been forced to go and NCIS would have been kicked out. So NCIS is taking over this investigation and keeping L.A.P.D in the loop. This way we can keep a better eye on Deeks and he won't be going in alone. He's going undercover and I'm going with him as a friend he met in prison."

"For how long?"

"I don't know. I'm here to grab some things to take over to a safe house. Tonight Deeks and I are going to speak to his connection in the cartel to see if we can even get in. Then starting tomorrow I'll be at the safe house. Hopefully this won't take long."

"Why are you going in? The two of you aren't getting along, how is that safe for either of you?" Michelle asked.

"Both Sam and Deeks are professional. They will get the job done and back each other up." Callen said.

"I'm going to speak to Deeks before we go in and try to clear the air." Sam said.

"I thought he wasn't even cleared for field duty." Michelle said.

"He isn't and Nate won't clear him. Hetty is going against Nate's recommendation. She doesn't have a choice though. It's either he goes in with us or he goes in alone with L.A.P.D. At least with us we can make sure he is safe and has back up." Sam said.

"Deeks is also going to be in an apartment that NCIS owns. It's covered with microphones and cameras so he'll be monitored and protected if something happens." Callen said.

"When are you leaving tonight?"

"We'll be at the bar around eleven. I'll go earlier and speak with Deeks at his apartment. Hopefully we can put an end to this between us." Sam said.

"You better mister. That guy has been through enough he shouldn't have to fight at work." Michelle said.

"I'll do my best baby. I need to get a bag together and I have to scout out the area of the bar. I'm going undercover as a criminal so I need to do some recon."

"Well that's a first. You've never been a common criminal before. Think you can handle it?" Michelle asked.

"I'll be fine. I'll do a little recon and see what kind of criminal I'll be. Hopefully this operation won't take long and I will make sure I keep in touch like I always do." Sam said.

"You better mister. Go get your things so you can be ready and set up. I have to get some things done before I pick the girls up. Will you be here for dinner?"

"Yes maim I will make sure I am here for dinner."

"You better be my parents are coming."

"I know, I remember. I promise I will be here right after work."

"Mmhm. Get going then." Michelle said.

Sam kissed Michelle on the cheek before he got up to go and grab some things for the safe house. He would bring clothes and a back-up gun. He looked in his closet and grabbed some clothes that would work for a criminal Sam thought. He could also grab some from Ops to bring with him as well later. Once Sam had everything him and Callen got back into his car so they could drive down to the bar. Deeks was right about one thing; Sam had never been in this area before so he didn't know what to expect.

"Are you really going to try and work things out with Deeks? Or were you just saying that for Michelle's sake?" Callen asked after a few minutes.

"I'm going to speak to Deeks tonight at his place before we go to the bar." Sam said.

"Are you going to tell him the truth?" Callen asked carefully.

"What do you mean?"

"Well do you really just not like Deeks or is it the timing of when he joined the team?"

"And what timing would that be?" Sam asked annoyed.

"Dom had been missing for two months. Deeks comes into the picture, is in Dom's desk; has Dom's partner. Dom was still missing when Deeks came in and took his place. Are you sure that has nothing to do with how you treated Deeks?" Callen asked.

"I don't know. I'll figure it out alright?" Sam said annoyed.

Callen didn't say anything else on the topic. He knew that Sam would do the right thing in the end; he was just hoping it wouldn't be too late by then. Deeks was very upset and hurt by Sam and the way he had treated him in the last three years. Deeks had been through a lot in his life and in the past three months; Callen didn't want Deeks to be going through anymore hurt. Out of everyone on the team Deeks was the last person that could handle being tortured. He wasn't trained to compartmentalize something like this. It's not Deeks' fault that he can't handle being tortured. Being tortured isn't some common thing that you go through every day. Callen couldn't blame Deeks for not being able to handle torture. Callen had been through a lot and seen a lot with the C.I.A and even he would have had trouble with what happened to Deeks if he went through it. The main problem now was getting Sam and Deeks to get along.

"He looks up to you, you know. Like an older brother. He wants your respect more than anything. It's part of the reason why he asked me for help on Saturdays. He wanted to be good enough for you." Callen said.

Sam let out a sigh as he thought about what Callen said. Sam really didn't know why he was so hard on Deeks. The problem was he needed to figure it out or he risked losing out on a potentially great friendship. They pulled up to the bar and Sam parked the car on the side of the street so they could get a good look of the area. They weren't going to get out of the car, because Sam didn't want to risk being seen by anyone. The area was rundown. The building had almost all of the windows boarded up. There was graffiti all over the outside. There were homeless people all along the streets, along with prostitutes and drug dealers. There were parents walking down the street with young children beside them and Sam couldn't help, but think that this is no place for a child to grow up.

"Well this is new for you." Callen said.

"It's going to take me all night to figure out this alias. I've been an ex-military before, but that wasn't as a common criminal. It was for terrorist and military groups. I've never gone undercover like this before."

"You're gonna have to listen to Deeks. He'll be able to give you some pointers for your alias. Deeks has been doing what we do for three years and now you get to try and do what he does best."

"Look at the children. They are walking by homeless people and drug dealers like it's nothing. These children are just doomed before they even get the chance." Sam said sadly.

"Surveillance here will be a little tricky, but I can make it work. Let's drive up a few blocks."

Sam put the car in drive and started to drive up the street. The street only got worse the further up you got. The houses became more rundown and the worst part was people were actually living in them. To think that people live like this was heartbreaking for Sam. He grew up in a totally different world compared to this. Sam couldn't imagine his daughters being in this area.

"Stop right here." Callen said.

Sam stopped his car, but he wasn't sure why Callen wanted them to stop right here. They were in front of old houses that looked like they should be condemned. They were in horrible shape and Sam would have been surprised if they even had electricity.

"Why are we stopped here?" Sam asked.

"See that white house right there between the two brown houses?" Callen asked as he pointed across the street.

"Ya, what about it?"

"That is the house that Deeks grew up in."

"That house?" Sam asked surprised.

"He lived there until he was fourteen, even after he shot his father his mother didn't move out. I didn't know he had a step-father." Callen said.

Sam looked at the house. It was the worst one on the block. Sam couldn't believe that Deeks came from a place like this. When Sam first met Deeks he thought he was nothing, but a joke. He was never serious and he was always so carefree. Deeks didn't worry about anything and he would make jokes at the wrong time and they were horrible jokes. Sam never thought that there could have been more underneath what Deeks shows. In the last twelve hours Sam had learned so much about Deeks that he never thought he would.

"How do you know that?" Sam asked.

"Because Deeks talks to me. We understand each other. I grew up in the foster system and he grew up in hell. Deeks just handled it differently than I did."

"How did I get him so wrong? I've always been good at reading people and yet with Deeks I got it all wrong. How is that possible?"

"Because Deeks is a great undercover detective and he can be anyone in a second. Deeks has done this his whole life hiding who he is. Even though, we understand each other Deeks never told me about growing up or that he had a step-father. I knew he was abused I could tell, but I didn't know it was that bad."

"I figured something happened for him to shoot his father, but I didn't think the abuse was that bad. I just thought his father was a drunk. I had no idea his life was this bad."

"There's a lot to Deeks that we don't know. You could know though, if you tried."

"I know and I will. I'm going to try and make this right I really am."

"I know you will." Callen said.

Sam looked at the house one more time before he put his car into drive and headed to the safe house. He knew he needed to get back to Ops so he could get his alias and try to make it believable. If he had to ask Deeks for help then he would. He wasn't going to put their operation at risk and Deeks truly was great at undercover work.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX

Deeks walked back into Ops just a little after three in the afternoon. He had spent the last few hours just getting some things over to the apartment and getting to know the place. He had to make it look like he was living there so he wanted to know where everything in the apartment was and what was in the area. Deeks was one of the best undercover detectives that L.A had and he didn't get that way by being lazy or doing things half assed. Deeks walked into Ops and he immediately went over to Hetty's desk so he could apologise for his earlier actions. He knew he wasn't professional and he knew it was uncalled for. Deeks knew he had to let it go with Sam and just go back to how he used to be by ignoring it and acting like it doesn't bother him. The problem he was having was, he just didn't know if he could do that anymore. After everything he did to protect Sam's wife and this country Deeks felt like that should have been enough to earn Sam's respect.

Hetty was sitting at her desk and looked up once she heard someone coming towards her. She saw that it was Deeks and she gave him a small smile. Deeks came right up to the desk before he spoke.

"I'm sorry about earlier. I was unprofessional and it won't happen again."

"It's understandable that you were upset. Mr. Hanna was in the wrong for what he said and when he said it. I am worried though, that you won't be able to keep yourself together while you are undercover Mr. Deeks."

"I'll be fine Hetty. I've been on operations before after a rough one. I can keep it together for this."

"Mr. Getz will be speaking with you once a week to check in on you. He's very upset about all of this."

"I'll continue to speak with him. To be honest I look forward to talking with Nate each week. Talking with him is really easy, like talking to an old friend that you've grown up with. There's nothing you can tell him that makes him think differently."

"Good. Miss. Blye is in the gym." Hetty said with a smile.

"Thanks." Deeks said with a small smile.

Deeks headed towards the gym so he could speak and apologize to Kensi for what happened in the Ops. Kensi had been on him recently to get over what happened between him and Sam. Deeks knew she would be upset with him for what he said and the way he acted towards Sam. Deeks walked into the gym to see Kensi at the punching bag and he was sure she was imagining his head on the bag. Deeks pulled out Kensi's favorite chocolate bar as he headed towards the bag. When he got there he smiled and held up the chocolate bar.

"I come in peace."

Kensi stopped what she was doing and smiled at Deeks.

"I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at Sam. You were right and I was wrong. You shouldn't forgive him." Kensi said with a heavy breath.

"I can't just be mad at him forever. I need to forget it and just move on. The problem is I don't know how to do that with this. I used to be able to ignore it and blow it off, but now I just can't seem to. I don't know maybe it would be better for me to go back to L.A.P.D after this." Deeks said and Kensi could hear the confusion in his voice.

"You better not, because then I will be pissed at you. Deeks you have every right to be here just as much as Sam does. I don't care what you yell out when we raid a house. You are an Agent and you're a damn good one. You are the one putting in the effort and time to get better and to grow. You are the one that has more than earned the respect of the team. And it's Sam that doesn't deserve your respect not the other way around. He thinks what you do for L.A.P.D is so easy, but he's about to find out just how hard it is to be an undercover."

"Sam's gone undercover before."

"Ya, but not as some criminal. He's gone for terrorist cells and that's only for a few hours here and there. He hasn't been under for long term in a very long time. He's never done what you do. He's about to find out just how much work you do for an alias."

"Speaking of aliases I have to go and see if Eric and Nell are done with mine."

"Okay I'm gonna shower then I'll see you out there?"

"Ya I'm not going anywhere yet. I want to see Sam's alias and see what he has. We're supposed to be friends so I should know the alias."

"Alright I'll see you out there in fifteen."

Kensi said as she grabbed the chocolate bar from Deeks and headed into the locker room to shower. Deeks headed out of the gym and up to Ops to see what Eric and Nell had.

"Hey guys."

"Hey Deeks. You alright?" Nell asked.

"I'm good. Sorry about before." Deeks said as he leaned his back against the table.

"Don't even worry about it. By the time Sam left he had us all mad." Eric said.

"Well that makes me feel better. Is my alias ready?"

"Both of them are ready. We pushed so you guys can have all the time you need to be ready for tonight." Nell said.

"Thanks. Can you print two copies of each?"

"Sure" Eric said as he turned to his computer.

"Why two?" Nell asked.

"We're supposed to know each other. I need to know Sam's as well as I know mine and he needs to do the same. Something really simple could be what gets us both made."

"Thinking like that is why you are one of the best Deeks." Eric said as he went over to the printer.

"Thanks Eric"

"Kensi was pretty mad. Has she calmed down?" Nell asked.

"She's fine I gave her a chocolate bar. She's in the shower right now."

"Alright here are both aliases for you. We didn't change anything in your history, we just added to the last fourteen months to complete the timeline." Eric said.

"Thanks guys. I'll read through them. Thanks." Deeks said as he grabbed the files and headed out of Ops.

"Do you think everything will be okay?" Eric asked Nell as he sat down.

"I hope so. They are both professional so they will get the job done. I don't know about personally though." Nell said.

"Deeks is better than Sam is thinking." Eric said.

"I know. Hopefully he figures that out soon. I'd hate to lose either one of them." Nell said.

"Ya" Eric said as he turned his attention back to his computer.

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It was just after four when Sam and Callen walked into the mission. Deeks was sitting at his desk reading a file that Sam figured was his updated alias. Kensi was sitting on her desk looking at Deeks. Kensi and Deeks looked up at Sam and Callen when they heard someone walking towards them.

"Hey Callen." Kensi said.

"Hey Kens. That your alias Deeks?" Callen asked as he made his way to his desk.

"Ya. Sam yours is upstairs." Deeks said, but he didn't take his eyes off the file.

"Thanks." Sam said.

Sam headed upstairs to get the alias and then he was going to go to wardrobe to see about some clothes for this operation. He needed to be quick he had to be home by six o'clock for dinner and he also had to read this alias and get it down right. They had to be over at the bar at eleven and that didn't leave him much time to get everything ready. It was another thirty minutes when Sam came down into the bullpen dressed in what he thought he would wear tonight at the bar.

"What do you think G?" Sam asked his partner.

Deeks looked up to see what Sam was talking about and he saw the clothes he was wearing. Sam was wearing designer jeans, a nice shirt with a thick gold necklace around his neck and a designer watch.

"Looks nice." Callen said.

"No." Deeks said looking at Sam.

"What's wrong with it?" Sam asked.

"Did you even read your alias? You're supposed to be a criminal who just got out of jail. Not a gangster or a pimp." Deeks said,

"So how am I supposed to look?" Sam asked.

"Casual, ridiculously casual. No big gold chains or designer clothing. You just got out of jail and you're broke. That's why you need in with me. You need to read your alias and mine and know them completely. You have to become this alias. Where do you live?"

"Down on west fifth."

"Wrong. It's no one's business where you live and that's what you tell them. Where are you from? Do you have an accent? Are your parents dead? You have to be this person, because simple questions like that can get us killed."

"I'm from New York, but I don't have an accent, because I moved around a lot. My parents are dead and my father was in the military he died in the line of duty."

"Any coffee shops in your area?"

"I don't know maybe. I don't drink coffee."

"You're just never going to drink coffee while this operation is going on? Even when you are alone?"

"There's some little mom and pop coffee shops just a few blocks from me."

"Think everything through, because when you are asked you can't think about the answer. You need to know the answers like you know yourself. Any hesitation can get you made and get us killed. It's like working with a rookie." Deeks said slightly annoyed.

"I'll be fine. I'll read the alias tonight and make sure I know the person. Are we meeting at the bar?"

"Ya. What are you driving?"

"My charger."

"The charger that is registered in your name?"

"I'll get a car from Hetty and have Eric change the registration. What are you driving?"

"The mustang that I drove last time."

"How did you get the mustang?"

"I stole it."

"You have an answer for everything don't you."

"Yup and you need to."

"I'll get it done. I gotta get heading home. If I'm late for that dinner Michelle is going to kill me." Sam said to Callen.

"Have fun with the in-laws." Callen said with a smile.

"Ya. I'll meet you at the bar Deeks?"

"Yup"

"See ya guys." Sam said as he headed back up to wardrobe to change and then he would see Hetty so speak to her about a car.

Sam knew he needed to know this alias and become it. He had done this before, but he had never done it for this long. NCIS going undercover, you go for a few hours a day and then go back to Ops and work the case. For Deeks he didn't do that. He would go undercover for six months straight. He would have to be that person all day long and he couldn't mess up or it would mean his life. Deeks was a pro when it came to long term undercover work and Sam was more than happy to let Deeks take the lead on this. Deeks knew what he was doing better than Sam and Sam was fine with that. Deeks had the way into this cartel and Sam was just there to keep him safe.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX

It was nine o'clock at night and Sam was sitting outside of Deeks' apartment in the car that he got from Hetty. It was an old charger that Sam could say was his fathers that he restored and had it in storage while he was in jail. It would be fast so if they needed to get away in a hurry they would be able to in this car. Sam knew they were supposed to meet at the bar at eleven, but Sam wanted to speak with Deeks before they went to the bar. Sam had spent the night reading his and Deeks' alias. Michelle was slightly annoyed, but she understood that Sam needed to know the alias for tonight.

Now he was sitting out front of Deeks' apartment trying to figure out what to tell him. He knew that Deeks was mad and upset with him and Sam could understand that. Sam had been thinking about this all day and night since their little confrontation in the Ops center. Sam never even thought that Deeks would be comparable to him. Sam never thought Deeks took this seriously and to find out that he had been working with Callen on Saturdays was unbelievable to Sam. He didn't think Deeks wanted to learn and if he had come to him he would have taught him. Sam would have trained Deeks if he had showed any interest in learning. Sam knew that it wasn't Deeks' fault for why Sam didn't like him. Sam knew that it was all the timing of when Deeks showed up that made him not like him. Sam knew it wasn't Deeks' fault for any of this and Sam knew he had to let this go. He had to let go what he thought of Deeks, because he was wrong. Deeks was completely different than Sam had thought he was and Sam knew he needed to let it go and move on. Sam needed to start over with Deeks and try to build an actual relationship with him. Sam was going to do his best to fix this, because he didn't want to lose Deeks. Even if at times he was annoying Deeks made the team better, he made the family better and Sam didn't want to lose him. Sam got out of his car and headed up the stairs to Deeks' apartment. As he got to the door he could hear crashing followed by glass breaking. Sam knocked on the door, but when no one came to it he tried the handle to find it unlocked. Sam went in slowly, he walked in and he didn't see Deeks in the living room.

"Deeks" Sam called out.

Sam didn't get a response so he moved further into the apartment shutting the door behind him. He went into the kitchen and saw Deeks frozen on the spot. His hands were on the counter and they were gripping it so hard his knuckles were white. He was breathing heavy and shaking slightly. Sam had seen this before from being in the military, Deeks was having a panic attack.

"Deeks" Sam said gently.

That was when Sam heard it a drill was being used in the next apartment. That's when Sam understood why Deeks was having a panic attack. He remembered Kensi telling him that the sound of a drill sent Deeks into a tailspin. It would bring the memories forward giving him a flashback and a panic attack all at the same time. The drill made Deeks worse and Sam did the only thing he knew to do. He wrapped his arms around Deeks tight and held on even when Deeks fought against him. Sam knew that this would help to get Deeks out of the flashback and get the panic attack under control. Sam had seen this many times before after being in a war zone.

"Deeks breathe. Just listen to my voice. Calm down you are not in that room. Just breathe Deeks."

Deeks was still fighting against Sam's tight grip. The sound of the drill had stopped again and Sam was hoping that would be enough to calm Deeks' panic attack down.

"Deeks calm down its okay. You need to breathe through this." Sam said gently again.

Deeks listened to Sam's voice and did his best to calm his breathing down. Deeks couldn't believe that he was having a panic attack with Sam right there. The only people who have seen him have a panic attack were Kensi and Nate and that was only because they were around for it. After a few minutes Deeks was able to get his breathing back under control so he pushed away from Sam's grip so he could go out on his balcony. Sam let go of Deeks and followed him through his apartment and then outside on the balcony. Deeks put his hands down on the railing and looked out at the beach. It was the only thing that had been able to keep him calm and level headed. The beach had been his therapy these past twelve weeks and Deeks knew he would never move out of this apartment. Sam stood off to the side and just looked at Deeks. Sam had never seen Deeks have a panic attack and he didn't even know he still had them. Deeks was nowhere near ready for this, but he was pushing through once again, because it was what was right. In that moment Sam realized just how proud of Deeks he was.

"I'm proud of you." Sam said softly, but in the quiet of the night it sounded like he had just yelled it for the whole beach to hear.

Deeks looked up and over at Sam. "What?"

"I'm proud of you. You aren't ready for this, but you are pushing yourself through this, because it's what is right. Deeks I'm sorry for the last three years and for this afternoon."

"I'm not in the mood to hear your lies." Deeks said as he pushed off the balcony railing and headed back inside.

Sam followed behind Deeks more determined than ever to speak to Deeks and get him to understand.

"I'm not lying Deeks. We need to talk about this. Just listen to me."

"I'm not going to stand here and listen to your lies or excuses as to why you treated me like trash for three years. Let's just face it Sam we are never going to get along."

"At least listen to the truth. I'm not here to tell you lies or excuses I'm here to explain and tell you the truth. If you still don't want to try and work this out then fine, but at least you'll be doing it with the truth. Just hear me out."

"Fine. Talk." Deeks said annoyed, but he knew Sam wouldn't drop this until he agreed to listen to him.

"It's not you. You are good enough Deeks. It's truly not you. I would have treated anyone else the exact same way as you. You came in at the wrong time for me; that's all. I know I shouldn't have treated you the way that I did. I can't apologise enough for the way that I have treated you in the past and today. I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want you to feel like you can't come to me for help or for training. When you showed up Dom had been missing for two months. We didn't know if he was alive or where he was. Dom was Kensi's partner, but he was mine to train. He was fresh out of the academy and completely new. I worked with him every weekend to build up his skills. I took him under my wing and when he needed me I wasn't there for him. I kept thinking if I had just trained him more, if I had pushed him more maybe he wouldn't have been taken. Maybe he would have noticed something was wrong. Maybe he would have gotten away. Then you show up and you take his desk and you take his partner and I was mad, because to me he was still alive and that was his place for whenever he came back. Then when we do find him he dies saving my life. So when I say it's not you I mean it. I would have hated anyone that took his place. It's not fair to you and I should have put it behind me long ago. I'm sorry Deeks. I misjudged you and worse I didn't take the time to get to know you before I judged you. I want to start over. I want to know the real you Deeks."

"We're too different. You come from a loving happy life and I come from a world where that type of life is only in the books you read. I tell jokes and try to make the best out of life, because I know how cruel this world really is. We're too different."

"I grew up in a good home. My parents never fought in front of me. My father was in the Navy and same with my grandfather. For me being in the Navy was an honor. I didn't grow up where there were prostitutes and drug dealers all over the street. I didn't have to fear my parents. We came from different worlds, but that doesn't mean we're too different to be friends. To get along. Deeks I have seen some horrible things from being in the Navy. I've been in war zones and I've almost died many times. I've seen horrible things that I wish I could forget. I can help you get passed what happened. I want to help you be able to move on from it and not just what happened three months ago, but with growing up. Deeks you shot you father. I could tell you right now I would never have had the courage to do that; even today I couldn't do that. You had more courage at eleven than I do now. Deeks let me help you with this. Let's start over and actually get to know each other."

"Why? Why do you care so much if we become friends or not?" Deeks said losing all fight in his voice.

"Because I was wrong. Because you are a great cop and I was wrong to judge you. I owe you my family Deeks. I can't tell you how many other Agents would have given in, but you didn't. Whether you did that for Michelle or for this country, you took the pain and you didn't give in like others would have. I want to help you get over all of this. I want to try and be friends. So can we at least just try and put the past behind us and start over?"

"I wasn't trying to take anyone's place. I didn't even know about Dom until Kensi called me to tell me what happened when he died. I wasn't trying to take his place Sam."

"I know you weren't and I'm sorry. I should have gotten passed it especially once you proved you had the skills for the team. I should have done with you what I did with Dom. I should have taken you under my wing and taught you what I know. Being in the military you got used to losing people. You knew every day when you woke up that that person beside you or across from you might not be there tomorrow, you might not be there. Being with NCIS and this team you don't realise that, that can still happen. I should have taught you everything I know to help you survive and if you let me I would really like to. You are good enough for this job; you're good enough for me. I would really like to train you and show you everything I know. So one day if you ever want to move up to an Agent or to something higher than that you'll have not only the ability to, but the confidence to do it. Let me help you Deeks."

Deeks was quiet for a few minutes while he thought everything that Sam said over. He wanted to start over with Sam. He wanted to trust Sam and believe that what he said was the truth. He wanted to believe that Sam would stop treating him like garbage, but after three years it was hard to believe. Deeks didn't doubt that Sam understood how he felt and had seen it before. Deeks knew that Sam was in the military and had been overseas in warzones. Deeks just didn't want to get burned or hurt again. He did know that he couldn't keep being angry, it was draining him.

"I don't know if I can do this." Deeks said softly.

"Deeks you can do this. Tonight we are just going to meet with Scar. All you have to do is get us in. I can move up the chain of command and you can just be a runner. If that's all you can handle then that's okay. You just need to get me in and I can do the rest. I need to know something important though, what triggers these panic attacks?"

"Drills obviously. Large crowds which doesn't make sense to me. We were alone so why crowds bother me so much doesn't make sense."

"That's common with PTSD of all kinds. It's hard to see who is in a crowd and that makes the anxiety increase. Is that all that triggers it?"

"Sometimes it just happens out of nowhere, like earlier."

"This isn't the first one today?" Sam said with concern.

"When we got back from the fire fight; in the locker room. Kensi helped put a stop to it though."

"The adrenaline wore off from the fight. How did Kensi stop it?"

"Talking usually helps, takes my mind off from it. It only works when it's just coming on though."

"So what do you do when you are home alone and you have a panic attack?"

"I try and breathe through it. I go out on the balcony. The beach helps calm me down, it always has since I was a kid. The beach was the only safe place I had to go. I used to sneak out when I was young and sleep on the beach when my parents were fighting or drunk. There's just something about the waves that calms me down, it always has."

"A lot of people find comfort in the beach. The sound of the waves is very calming and soothing for people. You especially though, you surf, the beach has been like home to you. It makes perfect sense for it to be able to calm you down. Are you getting flashbacks?"

"Sometimes; not as much as I used to. The sound of a drill is the only thing to bring the flashbacks on now. I'm working on it."

"I know you haven't been sleeping well, I can tell by looking at you. I know this sounds a little cliché, but it will get better. You've come a long way in just three months and in three months from now you'll be even farther than you are now. It's just going to take time and there are ways to work through the panic attacks and nightmares. Talking is key. I know it's hard to talk about it, but it really will be the best thing to do to get over this."

"I talk to Nate. Did you get a different car from Hetty?" Deeks asked hoping he could change the subject.

"I did. It's an older charger that belonged to my dad. It's in good shape so if we need a quick get-away then we can. Are we going in separate cars?"

"Ya, it'll look weird if we go together."

"What's Scar's story? Is there anything special that wasn't in the report earlier?"

"Not really. He's just a thug. He's tried being a bigger fish, but it doesn't work. He's not smart at all. He has street smarts, because he grew up on the streets, but he's really stupid. He's been in and out of jail since I've known him. He's the type to brag about stealing things and how he got away with it. But he leaves out the fact that for every time he got away with stealing something, there's ten other times where he was caught. He's really easy to manipulate though, if he thinks you're smart he'll do what you say."

"Well that will come in handy."

"Go in tonight and just be tough and quiet. Remember you're supposed to be protective of me from what happened in prison. Be tough, talk when they ask you questions and just be protective. We have one shot at selling your alias and that's tonight. I'm already in by knowing Scar. It's you that we have to get in and that's the easy part. The hard part is staying in."

"We can do this. I've been working on the alias all night and I'm confident in it. Have you heard from Bates?"

"He called me earlier to let me know that Mary and Jason are being held in county. The Warden knows that they cannot have contact with any prisoners or phone calls until he gives the clear. The news is going crazy with stories of this war. The Chief of Police has assigned a special squad to handle the gangs, but it won't work. He can't give the orders to assassinate anyone so they will just fight and get arrested. The head guys will make bail and be back on the street within twenty-four hours of their arrest. Even when the cartel is taken down it's going to take a long time before this mess is cleaned up"

"All we can do is what is in our power to do. Tonight we just focus on meeting Scar and then tomorrow we can go from there."

"Ya. I should get ready and then we can go."

"Ok"

Deeks headed to his bedroom so he could get dressed as Max Gentry. Deeks didn't know how tonight was going to go over and he was nervous as hell about it. He knew Sam would be there with him, but still that didn't ease any of his fears. He didn't like to be in crowds and he knew that the Dirty Fifty usually was filled with people; drunk criminals. Deeks really didn't want to do this and he knew he didn't have a choice. He hated not having a choice, but there really wasn't anything he could do about it. Deeks didn't know if he could handle this, but he was going to have to push through until he was alone. Deeks got dressed and headed out into the living room. Sam looked at Deeks and gave him a friendly smile. Sam could see that Deeks wasn't ready for this or had the confidence that he usually has. Sam had to admit he hated seeing Deeks like this and he just wanted to make him feel better. Sam could feel his protectiveness kicking into high gear with Deeks. Deeks was able to handle himself, but after what happened to him he was having a lot of problems. On the surface to those that don't know him would think he's fine, but the team knew better. They could see the difference in Deeks and they all just wanted him to go back to normal. Deeks always had a light in his eyes and the team had come to need that as their operations went on. Deeks wasn't innocent, but to them he was that light that they needed to get through the day. When they were in a bad place Deeks was able to tell some stupid joke and make them feel better. Deeks was in-tuned to them and he knew when they needed a joke or when they needed a silent comfort. He could read people better than Sam had ever been able to read someone. Deeks didn't tend to show it, but he was very intelligent and Sam knew there was a lot more to Deeks then they were ever showed.

"You can do this Deeks. If you feel overwhelmed just let me know and we can handle it. Remember you went through something horrible in prison so Max isn't perfectly fine right now anyways. We can go outside get some fresh air and then go back in and get the job done. You can do this Deeks and I am going to be right there beside you."

Deeks let out a deep breath before he spoke.

"Ok. Let's get this over with."

Sam gave a nod and they headed out of Deeks' apartment and into their own cars. Deeks still had the black mustang that Max was last seen in and Sam had the older charger. Deeks took off first and Sam followed behind him. He grabbed his phone and called Callen once he put it on speaker.

"Hey Sam. How's it going?"

"We are on our way now to the bar. This is a bad idea G; he's not ready for this."

"I know, but we don't have a choice. Deeks has the only way into the cartel. Did you at least speak to him?"

"Ya we cleared the air. I think we are finally on the right path to starting over. I walked in and he was having a panic attack G. He's got PTSD; he has panic attacks from being in crowds and from the sound of a drill. He still gets nightmares and flashbacks. He's nowhere near ready for this. This is a bad idea G; this could make him worse than he already is."

"I didn't know he was still having panic attacks. How often does he get them?"

"He had one earlier today in the locker room after the precinct attack. He's had two today and we are on our way to a bar where it will be crowded with drunk criminals. He doesn't believe he can do this. He doesn't think he can handle it. I told him that he just had to get me in and then I can move up in the cartel and he can stay as a little fish in this. He just needs to get me in tonight."

"We'll keep an eye on him and if he starts to show signs of getting worse then we will pull him. I'm not risking his sanity and safety for this. I know it's important, but I'm not putting an operation over anyone on this team again. I'm not making that mistake twice. Keep an eye on him tonight and make sure he is okay. If he starts to show signs of a panic attack then just remove him from the bar and try to calm him down."

"I know. I'm just glad that we can hopefully finally start over. I want to help him so badly G, he needs it."

"Deeks will be okay, because we won't let him not be anything but okay. It's going to take time. You know yourself how hard it is to overcome PTSD you've seen it before. He needs your help now more than ever Sam."

"I know and I'll be there for him through all of this. I'm not going to make the same mistake again. I was wrong and hopefully our talk will be the start to fixing this. Now I have to show him I meant what I said."

"You can do this Sam. You know you made the mistake in judging Deeks and I know you'll make that right. Just give him time, he'll come around."

"I'll call you later and let you know how it went."

"I'm sure it will be fine just focus on your alias and let Deeks take the lead."

"I know, I will. I'll talk to you later G."

"Be safe."

Sam hung up his cell phone and just focused on driving behind Deeks. They were almost there and he needed to focus on his alias. It still wasn't perfect; tonight he would work on it more after he got back home. Sam was more used to going with the flow; he didn't tend to think an alias through before he went in. Usually he had an idea and he just winged it, but this time he can't. This time was different. Sam knew he had to think his alias through, because he had to be this person that was created. This was different for Sam, but he wasn't going to let Deeks down. Sam was man enough to admit that this was Deeks' specialty. This is what made Deeks so damn good and got Hetty interested in him. Deeks had survived longer than most undercover detectives and that wasn't because he was lucky. Deeks was great and talented and Sam knew he had to start looking at Deeks as an equal, especially after what he did for his family.

They pulled up to the bar and Sam parked along the street behind Deeks. Sam got out and walked up to Deeks who was getting out of the car. Sam could tell that Deeks was already having problems and he was hoping they could just get through this.

"Remember to breathe and I'm right here beside you. You can do this Deeks."

"Ya, okay let's go."

Deeks took a second to get his mind into the right place. He had to be Max Gentry and not Marty Deeks. He just had to do this for a little while and then he could go back home and be himself again. Deeks started to head towards the entrance of the bar with Sam beside him. As they got closer to the entrance they could hear the music coming out from how loud it was. Sam didn't know how well Deeks would do in the bar. Sam knew that Deeks didn't like crowds, but he didn't know how well loud music and drunk people would go over either. Sam had his gun on him, but Deeks didn't have his. With the panic attacks Deeks was a little worried about walking around with a gun just in case. If he was just sitting in Ops then he wasn't worried, but out on the street with people had Deeks a little worried. Sam opened the door and went in first. His alias was protective of Deeks and Sam was very much protective of Deeks right now. The bar was full of people that were older and definitely rougher looking. These weren't high end society people, they were the lowest of the lows and it showed. The bar was dirty, the customers were criminals and prostitutes. The music was loud and some old rock song. Sam knew that Deeks was going to have some problems so he was hoping they could make this quick. Deeks started to walk towards Scar and Sam followed very closely behind him.

Scar was sitting down at a table with three other men that looked just as rough as he did. Sam could already tell everyone at the table were already drunk. Deeks walked up to the table and Scar smiled when he saw Deeks. Sam was ready for anything to happen and he wasn't going to let Deeks get hurt. Sam could see Deeks slipping into Max Gentry very easily and Sam was starting to feel a little hopeful that Deeks would be able to handle this just long enough for them to get in.

"Hey you son of a bitch. Where the hell have you been?" Scar said who was clearly drunk.

"In jail." Deeks said as he sat down in a chair at the table.

"Who's this?" Scar asked with a deadly tone to his voice.

"He's with me." Deeks said back in his cool tone that Max had.

"And who the fuck are you?" One of the men at the table asked Deeks, that Deeks didn't recognize.

"Relax he's an old friend. I've known Max since he was fourteen. You're friend gonna stand there all night or is he gonna sit down?" Scar said.

Sam sat down in the chair right next to Deeks, but he kept his face expressionless and hard. Sam had to be tough and he had to be tougher than anyone here at the table. That was one of the things Sam was good at doing. He was good at making people see that he was the top dog and no one was gonna overpower him. He had a lot of muscles on him and tattoos so it wasn't something hard for him to sell.

"What's your name?" Scar asked Sam.

"Why the hell should I tell you my name. I don't know who the hell you are." Sam said with a slight attitude to his voice.

Scar smirked at Sam and Sam figured that he had answered that question right.

"I think I'm starting to like you. The name's Scar, this is Twitch, Rabbit and James."  
Scar said pointing to each man. James was the only one that had spoken out of the three so far.

"Rabbit? That's the best nickname you could come up with seriously?" Deeks said with a slight laugh to his voice.

"We call him Rabbit cuz he's fast and likes to fuck a lot. We call him Twitch cuz he's always twitching for his next fix." Scar explained.

"No nickname for you James." Deeks said.

"I don't need a stupid nickname Max." James said rudely to Deeks and Sam knew that this guy was one to watch out for.

"Well don't that make two of us." Deeks said back as he looked at James.

"Well come on now big boy. You know our names what's yours?" Scar said to Sam.

"Ranger." Sam answered.

"That's your name? Damn your parents must have hated you." Twitch said and you could tell her was higher than a kite.

"Lucy in the sky." Deeks said with a smirk.

"I told you he's a little drug head." Scar said with a laugh. "How the fuck did you get the name Ranger?" Scar asked Sam.

"Nickname I got in prison. I used to be in the military." Sam said.

"Military man in prison, let me guess drugs?" James said.

"Weapons. I got sick of Uncle Sam screwing me over. So I would steal weapons off from bases and sell them. Some bitch ratted me out during a sale did two years."

"Only two years? Scar asked.

"I got out on good behavior." Sam said with a smirk.

"Muscles like that I would get out to. Try being a skinny white guy in jail. You never get out on good behaviour." Rabbit said.

"What the fuck did you do to get in jail Max? You barely ever get caught." Scar said.

"Weapons possession. Did a year been out for four months."

"Four months and you're just coming to see me now. I'm insulted Max. Where did you meet your friend here?" Scar asked.

Deeks knew that Scar would be asking a lot of questions and Deeks was prepared for that.

"He was in my cell block. An old rival gang was in the same cell block as me. Four months ago all ten of them jumped me. Ranger jumped in to help me out. I spent the last week of my stay in the infirmary. We became friends and he just got out a few days ago." Deeks said.

"You saved my boy?" Scar asked Sam.

"I had seen him around and I could tell something was going to go down. So I followed and jumped in. Ten against one isn't fair odds to me."

"So after a week now you are friends?" James said skeptically.

"We knew each other in prison. We were in the same cell block dumbass. We've had conversations in the past and he spent the week with me in the infirmary making sure I was alright." Deeks said.

"I can see your wrist is messed and the bruising. Is that from what happened?" Twitch asked.

"Ya, stabbed nine times and had my jaw broken in six places. If Ranger hadn't showed I would have been dead." Deeks said with darkness to his voice.

"That's brutal man." Rabbit said.

"I've known Max since he was fourteen; he's like a little brother to me. You saved his life so that makes you a friend of mine. He's made a lot of enemies over the years thanks for looking out for him." Scar said to Sam.

"He's like a brother to me now two. I'd die to protect him." Sam said as he looked at Deeks and Deeks could actually see that Sam was telling the truth.

"Let's get some drinks then. I got two boys out of jail it's time to celebrate." Scar said.

Scar waived a waitress over and took their order. Once Sam and Deeks had their drinks Deeks kept the conversation light. He didn't want to just dive right into the conversation about the cartel and Deeks didn't know if the other three knew about it. Scar was a smoker so Deeks figured he would get him outside. The bar was getting busier the closer it got to the later hours and Deeks was starting to feel anxious. Deeks was just sipping on his beer, because he was driving and he didn't want to get drunk. Sam was doing the same. Twitch had pulled out a small baggie with white powder in it and started to divide some up into lines.

"Who wants another hit?" Twitch asked.

"I'll do one." James said.

"Same." Scar said.

"Hit me." Rabbit said.

"Ranger, Max?" Twitch asked.

"I'm good." Sam said.

"Max you seem like the type to powder your nose." James said.

"I don't do that shit. No point in selling if you're just gonna snort the product away." Deeks said.

"You sell?" Twitch asked.

"Used to." Deeks said back.

"Max does a little bit of everything. That's why he's good to have around. He can do anything and if he can't he can find someone that can." Scar said.

The four of them did their lines and they had a few more beers. Sam and Deeks only had two and they could tell that James was watching them like a hawk. The bar was getting busier and the music was getting louder. Deeks was moving around more in his seat and Sam knew he was reaching his limit. It was almost one in the morning and Sam was worried that they wouldn't be able to get in tonight. Deeks had yet to bring it up so that told Sam that he didn't know these two guys.

"You don't drink much eh." James said to Deeks.

"I'm driving." Deeks said back.

"He never drinks much. His daddy was a mean drunk." Scar said.

"You telling everyone my personal shit Scar." Deeks said with a dark tone.

"Sorry man; didn't mean anything by it. I'm gonna go for a smoke come with me I got something I want to talk to you about." Scar said as he got up.

Deeks looked at Sam and Sam knew that this was it.

"I'll be right back." Deeks said to Sam.

Sam just gave a nod and kept his eyes on Deeks as he left the bar with Scar. Sam saw Deeks and Scar standing in front of one of the small windows out front. He wouldn't be able to hear what they were saying, but he could at least see Deeks.

Deeks leaned against the window sill and Scar lit up a smoke. Deeks hated smoking, but he had gotten used to the smell from being undercover so much over the years.

"You working?" Scar asked once he had a puff of his cigarette.

"Here and there. Nothing solid yet. I've been healing these past four months. I haven't been out much."

"You don't seem too okay with everything."

"I'll be fine in time."

"Ranger a good guy?"

"He is. I know he's ex-military, but he's solid. He understands the chain of command and what loyalty means."

"I'm working for this cartel that's new to L.A. They're looking for members. Its small stuff like running drugs, but if you and your boy want in it pays good." Scar whispered.

"You know I don't like small time shit." Deeks said hoping to get more information out of Scar.

"I know, but it's a start. I like just running, but the boss is looking for more guys to move on up. H's always got something crazy planned and he could use your connections on the street to help get the right guys for the job. Your boy there must know a lot about military bases and weapons. I know the boss would like that."

"I don't know man. I don't know if Ranger would go for that. Let me talk to him about it and get back to you." Deeks said coolly.

"Well tomorrow some of the higher guys are having a party. So if you want to move up the chain then you should come."

"Where is it?"

"The boss rented out Overtime for us all."

"Down on Jackson?" Deeks asked.

"Ya that place. It's real nice and the boss is even paying for all the drinks."

"Nice boss."

"He's great to work for. The cartel is huge and he is loaded. The runners keep half of the profits they make that day from selling the drugs. He keeps us happy. It's a good job and you and your boy would be good. Think about it man."

"Ya I will and I'll talk to Ranger about it and see what he thinks. I'm not sure it's his thing, but I'll ask."

"He like making money? I've made three grand this month already just from running drugs for a few hours a day. You can't beat that. But maybe you want to be on the straight and narrow now. You could go flip burgers I suppose." Scar laughed at his own joke.

"I ain't flipping no burgers. This life is the only one I know and I'm damn good at it. What's the cartel's name?"

"Some Spanish name. It means Satan's Angels I know that. Even if you don't want in at least come to the party and get drunk for free." Scar said with a smile.

"I'll probably come and see you. I'll think about joining. I want to meet some of them first and then I'll decide."

"You never do anything without thinking it all through Maxie." Scar said with a smirk.

"That's why you always end up in jail and I rarely get caught. Even when I do they can never get me for anything serious." Deeks smirked back.

"Ya, ya, ya, let's get back inside."

"I'm gonna head home. I'll speak to Ranger before I go."

"You used to be a partier. What happened to you?"

"I almost died four months ago. I'm still in pain from it. I got these metal plates in my mouth still for a few more weeks until they can come out. I'm on pain meds two so I'm tired a lot of the time now." Deeks said honestly.

"That sucks man. Go rest up then. I'll see you tomorrow at the party."

"Definitely."

Deeks and Scar walked back inside. Scar sat back down, but Deeks didn't.

"I'm gonna head out. You good?" Deeks asked Sam.

"Ya I was gonna head out to." Sam said as he got up.

"Leaving so soon?" James asked.

"Been a long day." Deeks said.

"You need anything you got my number." Scar said.

"Thanks man. I'll be fine."

"Hope to see you again Ranger." Scar said to Sam.

"I'm sure we will."

Scar held his hand out and Sam shook it. Deeks and Sam left the bar and as they were walking towards the cars Deeks whispered.

"Just follow me."

Sam headed to his car and they both took off down the street. Deeks drove for a few minutes and went down a few different blocks. Once he was certain no one was following him, besides Sam, he pulled over down an alley. Sam pulled up behind him and got out of the car. He went into the passenger side of Deeks' car and sat down. Sam looked at Deeks and could see him shaking slightly. Deeks closed his eyes and took a few deep breathes to calm down.

"You okay?" Sam asked with worry in his voice.

"Ya I'm good. That wasn't so bad."

"No problems came up. How was it for you to be in the bar with the people and loud music?"

"It was hard, but it wasn't too bad. It's different when I'm with someone I know in a crowd then when I'm alone."

"That makes sense. If you are with someone you know and trust, than you don't have to worry as much. You know that person has your back. When you are alone it's just you if something happens. It will get better Deeks with time."

"I know. There's a party tomorrow night at Overtime. It's a middle class bar. Apparently the boss of the cartel rented it for the night and is paying for the drinks. A lot of lower fish are going to be there, but higher fish will be there as well. Scar invited us to come and to join the cartel. Apparently the boss is looking for higher fish with valuable skills. I told him I would talk to you about it and come see him tomorrow. I never said I would join, just that I wanted to meet some of the higher fish first before I decide."

"What did you say about me?"

"I told him I didn't know if that was your thing. I said I would speak to you about it and see. He likes you because he thinks you kept me safe in prison for Scar that's enough."

"You two seem close."

"It's weird. Growing up I had Ray and he always knew my real name and who I was. We grew up together. Even when he took a different path than me he never told anyone I was a lawyer and he never told anyone I was a cop. Even when I would go undercover as Max he played along. He's my brother. With Scar it's weird, because he knows Max and he looks at Max like a little brother. He's protective of Max and knows him. So it's weird, because we are close, but he's not close to me he's close to Max. It's confusing and it gets hard at times to remember that he doesn't know me and if he did he would hate me, because I'm a cop. All he will ever know is this made up person."

"I couldn't imagine having to be two people like you. I've been undercover, but that's only for a little while. With Max you keep having to go back to him all the time. That can't be easy."

"It's not. I made Max up when I was younger to protect myself on the streets. I never expected for that person to keep following me. I know we might have to arrest Scar in all of this, but that doesn't make it easier. He did protect me growing up on the street. He taught me how to fight. He taught me how to read people and how to survive. Between him and Ray they taught me everything I needed to know. This one time I was fifteen and I stole a car and picked Scar up. We got pulled over by the cops and I pulled down an alley. He told me to get out and run. I thought he was coming with me, but he didn't. He moved over to the driver side and took the hit. He was gone for six months and when I finally saw him he said that's what older brothers do. He's a criminal, but he's not all bad."

"Criminals have morals just like everyone else. It's the same thing in prison why the child molester gets attacked. Criminals are people and they won't stand for certain things. He genuinely seems to care about you, even if he doesn't know the real you."

"Ya" Deeks let out a sigh. "Did Twitch, Rabbit or James say anything to you when I was out with Scar?"

"Not much. Twitch was pretty high to even think of how to speak. James is interesting. He asks a lot of questions and he doesn't seem to believe any of the answers."

"The bar has cameras we should see if Eric and Nell can find out more about him. He could be a scout for the cartel."

"You think whoever is in charge has scouts working for him?"

"It's possible. The boss would stand out so he sends in someone that would blend in. Someone that can ask questions and someone that you can open up to, especially drunk and high. You want to know who is working for you and what people are saying there wouldn't be a better way to do it."

"We should go in tomorrow and talk about all of this. We can have them try and find out who he is."

"We should get going. I'm sure Michelle is wondering where you are."

"Are you okay to drive?"

"I only had two beers."

"That's not what I meant."

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" Sam asked with concern.

"I'm fine Sam. I'll see you tomorrow."

Sam gave a nod and got out of the car and headed back into his. Deeks pulled out his cell phone and called the one person he needed more than ever. After two rings she picked up.

"Deeks?"

"Hey, sorry did I wake you?"

"No I was waiting for your call. How did it go?"

"It was fine. Sam and I are in if we want. There's a party tomorrow night that we got invited to. So it's a start, but we're in for now."

"Good. Was Sam okay with you or was he an ass?"

"He's fine. We talked before we left and we worked it out I think. He told me why he was this way with me and I think we can start over. He wants to and so do I. I don't want to be mad all the time. It would be nice to be friends with him. It would make working together easier."

"Good. I'm glad you two are working it out. Are you home?"

"Not yet. You want to come over?" Deeks asked softly.

"I'll be ready in ten."

"I'll be there soon then."

"Bye"

Deeks hung up his phone and then started to drive towards Kensi's apartment. She was always able to make him feel better. He really did love her and he knew she loved him. Deeks was just hoping that one day they would be able to act upon that love and be in a relationship. All Deeks had to do was get his head on straight first. Deeks drove to Kensi's apartment and when he pulled up she was waiting out front for him. She was in sweat pants and a tank top; clearly she was lying in bed waiting for his call. He pulled up and she ran over to the car and got into the passenger side.

"Hey partner." Kensi smiled.

"Hey Fern." Deeks smiled back as he put the car into drive and started to drive towards his apartment. Tomorrow he would be at the NCIS apartment, but for tonight he would be home.

"So it went well tonight?"

"Ya it was fine."

"How were you with the bar and the people?"

"It was alright. Sam was right beside me so that helped. It got a little harder closer to the end when the bar was full. It was weird seeing Scar again after so long."

"Well you knew him from growing up. I would imagine that would be awkward and hard, because you're a cop now."

"It is hard. I know he might end up being arrested, but that doesn't make it any easier. We were friends and he's still a friend of Max. He's a criminal, but he's always been really great with Max, with me. I don't know I sound like a crazy person."

"No you sound like a person that at a young age was forced to be two different people. Deeks, you created Max to survive on the street. Of course it's confusing for you. For four years you were that person, than you went back to being you and then back to being him over and over again for operations. How could that not be confusing? You're living two lives with two different personalities, jobs and friends. It makes sense that for you as Marty Deeks you don't like what Scar stands for and is doing. Just like it makes sense that for you as Max you understand Scar and see him completely differently than everyone else. This would be confusing for anyone."

"I'm just tired of it, ya know? Constantly being different people and doing things I would never do, but I don't have a choice if I don't want to get made I have to do it. Before you guys I thoughts that's all I'll ever be good at and I was happy with it. I was happy to be different people and live the life. I didn't have to worry about anyone missing me if I died. I didn't have to worry about a relationship and trying to explain to someone that I would have to leave for months on end with no contact. Now I turn down operations. I'm happy to just be me and live my own life and not someone that was produced in a file. I don't know if I'm going to sign the papers, but after this operation I think I'm done being an undercover. The danger of it all just doesn't excite me anymore. I've seen a lot of horrible things and I've had to do a lot of horrible things. I can't really do it anymore."

"No one can blame you for that Deeks. You've gone undercover for months in places that most people would never go. You're arrest record is amazing, you should be proud of what you have done. Regardless of those papers you're a better agent then most of the ones we have now. Deeks there are a lot of agents working with cops in a police station, but you are the only cop working for an agency. That right there speaks louder than any title. If you can't do it anymore than you can't do it anymore and I don't think there is a single person that would be disappointed with you. You have been able to bring down cartels and gangs that most people wouldn't have survived the operation. You should be really proud Deeks."

"Thanks."

Deeks didn't know what to say to that. He was still having a hard time talking about his emotions and feelings. With Kensi it was a little easier, but that didn't make it easy all the time. He was just glad that for tonight he could have Kensi by his side before this operation started up fully. Deeks pulled up to his apartment and he parked on the side of the road like he always does. They got out of the car and headed upstairs. When Deeks opened the door Monty came right towards them. Kensi petted Monty and Deeks grabbed the leash to take him out real quick.

"I'm just gonna take him real quick. I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Ok"

Deeks left Kensi in the apartment alone for the few minutes while he was gone with Monty. Kensi noticed that the apartment was very clean so Deeks' OCD had been in overdrive tonight. Kensi had seen it before over the last three months. When Deeks was getting more stressed out he would clean and keep everything in specific places. Kensi knew that if she moved something just slightly in the house Deeks would notice it and have to move it back. Kensi knew this came from him growing up so she wasn't going to mess with him. She could understand that this came from his childhood and it was a way to help him cope growing up. She wished she knew more about him and what he had gone through, but that was a conversation she could have with him later on. She was sure during this operation that she would have many questions for Deeks. Deeks came back in with Monty who was already off his leash. Deeks had been the one to train Monty and he was very well behaved. Deeks locked the door as Kensi spoke.

"Come on you need sleep." Kensi said as she grabbed Deeks' hand and lead him into the bedroom.

Them sharing a bed had been pretty common in the past three months. Kensi found that she needed to feel Deeks beside her and Deeks had found that he needed to hold Kensi at night. They both slept better when they were together and they both never said anything. The next morning wasn't awkward at all; they just got up and would go about their morning routines. They would get up, have breakfast and they would go for a surf. It was like they were living together only they weren't. Once in the bedroom Deeks grabbed a t-shirt and sweat pants and headed into the bathroom to get changed. Kensi didn't say anything she just crawled under the covers and waited for when Deeks would come back. Sure enough five minutes later Deeks was back in the bedroom all set for bed. He crawled under the covers next to Kensi and she instantly curled into his chest and he wrapped his arms around her. Deeks could already feel himself calming down and able to breathe again. Deeks knew that if he was going to survive this operation mentally he would need Kensi there.

"I think you should have an alias just in case. If you come by one night and someone else is there or someone shows in the morning. It might be good to have one just in case someone goes snooping around."

"That sounds like a good idea, because you are not getting rid of me that easily. I know Max isn't one for girlfriends, but we could just be sleeping with each other. That way I could be there for a party you have or just at night."

"We can talk to Hetty about it tomorrow."

"You need to sleep Deeks. Just close your eyes and relax. I'm right here."

Deeks held Kensi closer and he started to stroke her hair. He could feel her start to fall asleep so he closed his eyes and just enjoyed the feeling while it lasted. He knew tomorrow they would be working for the party tomorrow night and Deeks had to be ready for it. He had to make sure Sam would be ready for it. For tonight though, he would just enjoy having the woman he loves sleeping wrapped up in his arms.


End file.
